I'm sooooooo done unpacking. Ok, not literally, but spiritually, I'm done. I have spent all week busting my butt trying to get all this shit put away, plus working two of the days, it's been hectic. I'm not done by a long shot. I still have a ways to go and every time I think I'm almost done.... more boxes appear! It's like some wicked kind of magic.

I had opened all the boxes and realized that the box with all John's work uniforms was missing. I panicked. I know there is nothing left at the other house except for the left over garage sale stuff, so it's not there. I think I rechecked each box about 4 times... nothing. After some careful thinking I came to the conclusion that someone must have accidental placed that box in the attic. Now, understand that I had just PACKED the attic. Oh joy. So yesterday I pulled everything out of the attic on a mad hunt. TA DAAAA, found them, thank God. I also realized that the attic is ginormous! So I was able to put it all back in a much more organized fashion. OH, and after I had gotten a flashlight so I could see all the way to the back, I saw that the owners had left a big plasma tv in there... PAYDIRT!! WOO HOO, how cool is that?!!? Not so cool as it turns out. I crawl back there only to realize that the screen is all smashed up. Darnit! Oh well. Anyway, the attic is all neatly put together. Now I just have to find room for the rest of this crap.

I've already found 4 large boxes of stuff to purge for garage sale. That's good right?? Not to mention all the stuff I got rid of pre-move. I don't know how I became such a pack rat. I like "things"! Then when I'm done getting everything out of boxes, a lot of it has to be reorganized. My kitchen is just not working for me. I have to adjust a lot of stuff. My goal is to have the house in order and presentable to the public by next weekend.

I still have such a long to do list. Finish Calli's kindergarten registration which includes getting a physical for her, and a birth certificate since hers is not where it's supposed to be. Sign the kids up for the rec program so Nick can play football. Sign them up for the reading program (which sign ups are tomorrow - someone remind me). Figure out all our bills, set up the filing cabinet and get on a schedule. And get Nick's social security forms filled out. Now I know you don't care about any of this, but I'm writing it down for me not you, so you can ignore this paragraph. LOL There's so much more... I think I need to sit and write it all out.

Holy STRESS BATMAN. Speaking of stress. John's blood pressure has been through the roof and they have put him on some meds, including xanax. Oh Yeah Baby!! Bought damn time. Hopefully it'll calm him a little bit.

Damn, totally forgot what I was just about to say... arg, it's probably cause I'm so damn tired. A very crazy week, and then at Shell's till 3:30 or so and going to sleep about 4:30 and getting woken up at 7:30. (all times are AM) LOL I don't work well on 3 hours of sleep. I need at least 8. So I'm wiped. I really wanted to take a nap today, but it just didn't happen.

Today was father's day. I got up and made John a big breakfast. In the afternoon, we went to pick up our new friends. Now I know I've said no more animals, but .... but,.... but.... as new members to mom's bird club, we were told about a couple that had 2 yellow hooded amazons that needed a home. They were no longer home enough to care for them and wanted to find something better. We went to see them and packed them up. LOL They are BIG talkers. Holy crow. They sing, they making kissing noises, say hello, night night (when they want their cover on to go to sleep) they say "I can talk, can you fly?" HA wise asses. They have a 40 phrase vocabulary right now that we hope to expand on. We were originally only going to take one, but they are said to be siblings and had been together since birth. I feared the separation would kill them (totally possible in big birds). So, we thought we'd try it out with the two and see how it goes, if it doesn't work, we'll find a home for one of them. They are very sweet and handelable. Even being as scared as they were with the move, we were able to hold them. Very cool. We need to work on their names though. I'm being told that at 6 years old, it's to late to change them, but Trinidad & Tobago... No thank you. I told John maybe we'll just shorten them to Trinny and Tobby or something.

Ok, fingers are cramping. I will really try to post more often. Cause, ya know, my boring life is just so captivating! HA!

I can't believe I am saying this, but in approximately 2 1/2 weeks we will be moving BACK TO ROCKAWAY!!

We finally found a house to rent. Single family, on a dead end street, fenced in yard and semi affordable. I will most likely have to get a job or get the Mary Kay in gear to cover it, but I think we'll be fine. Now the craziness begins.

I have to change/cancel/connect all the utilities, register Calli for kindergarten, transfer Nick's school, change of address, renter's insurance, football registration..... Not to mention trying to get this house all packed up. UG!

We had a full weekend and of course today I woke up, couldn't eat cause I had to get blood work done (surgery follow up), go do that, go to the bank to get the security deposit and drop that off to Rich. By the time I was done, I had a RAGING headache. Wahhh. So I came home and ate something and took a nap for an hour. I still feel like doodie though. So no packing got done today. Tomorrow I'll start. Of course I have to find more boxes though, otherwise our entire house will be packed in small Mary Kay boxes that I got from clearing out Margaret's storage room.

We're helping our friends Lea and Tom move this weekend and then our niece's birthday party is on Sunday, so that will blow some time. The following weekend is the town wide garage sale... which works out since I was planning one for this weekend and then realized we wont be home for most of it. So I'll try to get everything packed and then whatever is left will be sold. Then the following weekend is move in. EEEKKKK!! (Allison, garage saleing with you is still on, I may just have to shorten my attendance time though, otherwise John will kill the children or sell them!)

I'm really happy, I just don't think it's sunk in yet that we're really moving. I can't wait till it's done and I can get the kids settled. Not to mention being only 2 minutes from Shell! How cool is that?!?!

Everyone else is good. Well, they are now at least. My niece called me last week and told me they had an accident. She tripped over the dog while carrying the baby and fell. The baby hit his head and got a knot so they took him to the hospital. Unfortunately, it turned out that he had fractured his skull. Poor baby! They sent him to the bigger hospital and kept him over-night running tests and so forth. But all was well. They sent him home the next evening with just "watch him" instructions and to come back in six weeks to check the fracture. Of course Cassy was a mess, it being her first baby and him only being a month old. I tried to calm her, but it's hard when you're 1,500 miles away. Luckily it wasn't worse than it was and he's doing fine now. But we were worried there for a while. Love and prayers for little Madden.

Otherwise.... hmmm, oh, jeeze, I'm reading My Sister's Keeper. Not a good choice if you're a mom. I swear I keep checking my kids for bruises and every time they cough or something, I'm picturing chemo or something horrible. I love to read. Anyone who knows me knows I'm addicted really. But I always seem to get so engrossed in a book that I can actually FEEL it. I swear that when I read The Stand by Stephen King, I had a cold through the ENTIRE BOOK! I'm such a dork. This current book is really good. I, unfortunately, skipped to the end like I always do and got a shock that I wasn't expecting. I usually don't mind these surprises, but for some reason, this one hit me kinda hard and I'm not liking the fact that I'm getting closer and closer to that end. I don't want it to end that way, but such is life.

Coffee break, please hold..... Aaaahhhhh, yum

It's freezing in my house. Of course we have no heat, so when the air dips outside, it plummets inside. It's about 55 in here now. Arg. I can't wait to move!!!

So, if anyone is around and available to help me pack for the next 2 weeks, feel free to stop buy, and if anyone is available the weekend of the 13/14 of June, come grab a box!! Lunch will be served to all who help. Nothing like my usual meals, sad to say, but I'm sure pizza and beer can be arranged.

That's it for now, I'm going to go bundle up in a blankey.

I hate the sun!

Ok, so I don't really hate the sun, I just wish it would wait to rise until say, 9 AM. You see, when the sun is up and bright at 6:30 in the morning, it goes right into my daughter's room and wakes the sleeping demon - I mean princess. So then she is up when I'm trying to get Nick out the door. Mayhem ensues. Plus, when she gets up that early, she gets really cranky in the afternoon and naps have seem to eluded her lately unless we're driving in the car. Not to mention that there's also times that I'm just really tired in the morning and want to go back to sleep! Damn kids.

This week seems to be "catch up with old friends" week. Monday I had lunch with my friend Yesi which was fun. She walked into the restaurant looked toward me and then kept looking around trying to find me! LOL It was really good to see her. Yesterday, I spent a few hours with my dear friend Donna. I love that chick! She's the best. She's one of those friends that can always make you laugh until you cry even when you're desperately depressed. She's a good one to keep around. Who else wants to visit me???

So, I'm out of books! ARG. Now, I know most of you are saying, so what? But let me tell you something. I need my books! I usually have at least 3 books running at a time. I've read everything in my house. My cousin is supposed to give me some, but I haven't gotten them yet. I have my e-book, but I didn't really want to spend the money to order any for it right now. I'll have to go on and see if there's any good deals to be had so I have something to read. I actually want to check out Michael J. Fox's new book. I saw the special they did based on it, but I'd love to read it. It's all about how even though life has given him a very tart glass of lemonade, he's still the eternal optimist. A big saying in the Mary Kay world is "What you think about, you bring about". I do believe that. I need to start thinking about living in a big house and paying hardly anything for rent!

So, that's what I'm off to do, find a good book to read. Have a great day people.

Here's some pics from Easter at my mom's house. She has crazy deer that come right up to the house to eat and hang out. I thought I'd show how close they really get.

Update:
The house buying thing isn't going to work out. Although it was a great idea, financially it was a no go. We would have been able to afford it, but the upfront costs would have wiped out our friends and that's just not an option. So we're back to looking for something to rent. We found something we want, in an area we want, but they turned us down because our credit was too low. Damn credit!!! So we're still on the hunt.

I went to a tricky tray last week with the girls. It was lots of fun and my luck held out. I was the only one of us who won anything (sorry girls!). I made out really well. Actually, the kids made out really well. I didn't win anything for myself! I got a bunch of Thomas trains, which when I went online and added it up came up to over $160 worth! I also got a basket of stuff for Calli which included cheerleading gear, a puzzle, a snow cone maker and some arts and crafts stuff. I also won a a puppet theater and a couple of puppets. Calli loves that. It has a fake clock on the top and she keeps moving the hands and says, "The next show is in 5 minutes!" She then makes everyone sit and watch her shows. LOL They only last about a min, but are very cute.

Saturday, they had the NJ Pet Expo at the fair grounds and Mom's bird club was there so we went to see. She had to do a little speech and had brought her Cockatoo with her. I ended up holding him most of the time. He's the only one of her birds that I can hold and not fear that he'll take my face off. LOL I found out later that some chick was taking pics of me with him for the paper. Check out the Daily Record folks, I may be in there! I looked in yesterday's paper, but didn't see it. After the expo, we took Mom out to Pub 517 (it's the sister restaurant to Pub 199 for you locals) for a Mother's Day dinner. It's in a much prettier setting but has the same food and same prices. Mom and I had lobster and steamers! YUM!!! Not that I could eat it all. I ended up eating about a dozen steamers and a claw of the lobster. LOL I took the other claw home and gave Mom the tail. It was Good Eats!

Mother's Day Sunday, I woke up to John basically throwing a plate at me that had a scrambled egg on it and a piece of toast. He was all pissy and said the kids were driving him nuts. He wasn't feeling good and that's all I was getting. I said, what about all the other stuff I bought? The bacon? The croissants? The hashbrowns? The cinnamon rolls? Nope, he didn't feel like cooking all that. So eat what I had and like it. I was so upset! I started crying, said, "I can't believe you! I had to go out and buy this stuff myself and you can't even cook it for me on Mother's Day?" WTF........

Then I REALLY woke up!!! It was all a bad dream LOLOLOLOL John walked in with a silver platter! Holding all the yummy things I had purchased and a steaming cup of coffee. He set me all up and then went back down with the kids to give me time to eat in peace. Then a little later he and the kids joined me in bed and we watched a movie together. It was very nice! Later in the day, we all got dolled up and went to a play at the local playhouse. The were doing the Never Ending Story. It was so good. The kids really enjoyed it. I had a great time. We stopped at the movie store to rent The Neverending Story so the kids could see it, but they only made it through about a half hour before they were passing out. We'll finish it tonight.

All in all, it was a great day.

Today I have an unemployment meeting (joy) and then I'm meeting an old co-worker/friend for lunch. She hasn't seen me post-surgery, so this should be fun! LOL I love the shocked look on peoples faces when they see me. Oh, I took some pics of me and the kids yesterday when we were all dressed up. John had to run to get his phone fixed, so I took the kids out on the front porch for a photo shoot. And the sweetest thing..... A women actually pulled over on the road and asked if I would like her to take a picture of all of us together. How sweet is that!?! The chick has some serious good karma! I didn't take her up on it (I didn't want her to have to waste her time and I was just taking some silly pics), but still!!! Too nice. I'll put them on here as soon as I can. The dress I'm wearing in the pictures, I found in my closet. It's a size 20, but it's the only dress I had and thank God it was a tie back. There is so much material in the back, it looks pleated!! LOL Plus I had to pin the cleavage together. Hey, it worked in a pinch! I really have to go buy a little black dress for just in case moments like these. BTW, if anyone fits in a 20 and would like the dress I'm wearing, let me know, it's yours! It's really comfy and pretty.

Ok, that's it for now, must go shower.

I was reminded last night that I have been seriously shirking my blogging duties, so I thought I'd send out an update. It's been soooo crazy here, I can't even tell you.

So, I was supposed to spend last weekend in Florida, house hunting. I didn't go. About a week before I was to leave, Shelly (my best friend) came over to spend some quality time. (That "impending move" sadness) We were even working out having her come down with me. As the kids ran around the house playing, we talked. Then she asked why we didn't just rent in NJ. I explained that it was too expensive. We looked at some listings on the internet and somehow the conversation got turned to buying a house, which we obviously can't do since our credit is so screwed and the bank is about to take this one away. So out of the blue, she says, what if we buy a house and you can rent from us..... WHAT??? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? Tim would never go for that. She said, Hell, it's worth a shot. She called him and explained and do you know, he said yes. Just like that, Sure, why not. SHOCK!!! I can't even tell you how I felt. How nice it was too have friends who love you that much.

So we started scouring the internet looking for something cheap enough. We enlisted Rich to do his realtor duties and get us into some houses. We did a few days worth of drive bys. The first one we went into wasn't horrible, but it needed a ton of work, not to mention the underground oil tank that looked like it had liquid in it (not a good thing).

The second one... whoooo boy. It was a decent house, and a really nice piece of property. Not in the best area, but beggars can't be choosers. So anyway, we go to the house, knock on the door and someone answers.... no one speaks english, ok, no big deal. We walk in to see/hear a SCREAMING little naked boy (ok, so he had on undies, but the little speedo type so naked is a good call) He was running through the house, screaming and throwing cars across the floor, at windows and I may have ducked once. Then the smell hit us smack in the face. They had just cooked dinner which was some sort of .... uh.... ??food?? I'm not sure. It was a big mass of brown liquidy stuff on a plate with some beans floating in it. I don't know, but it smelled awful. We go into the bedroom to find a bed, into another bedroom to find 2 more beds. Then upstairs to find a lot more beds, 1 guy, 3 women and 4 kids. Ok. It wasn't to bad, needed work, but it was alright. We thought we'd go look in the basement to check plumbing and so forth. The only access is from bilco doors on the outside. Rich opens the doors, walks down the stairs, opens the main door and SURPRISE!! There's people down there. There were like 4 more beds and 3 or 4 more guys down there. IMMIGRATION!!!!! Holy cow. If that wasn't bad enough, someone was upstairs taking a shower and ALL the water was pouring directly down into the basement into a make-shift bucket that was overflowing onto the floor. NICE! This property had a small garage that we couldn't get in, a two car garage that was packed with crap including a large construction machine thingy and then a shed in the back that was stacked almost to the ceiling with garbage, like actual garbage. YUCK

It's so much fun looking at houses. Cause no matter how bad you think your house is, there's always one worse!

We now have our eye on a place in Dover. It's vacant (THANK GOD!), it's old and needs some work but not nearly as bad as the other two. Aunt Irene, it's like our old Dover house with the walk up attic made into bedrooms and then the actual attic off one of them. It's got a fenced in yard and is on a much nicer street. So, right now we're waiting for the mortgage chick to get back to Shell on all the financing stuff. Cross your fingers everyone. Cause if we don't find something soon.... we'll be knocking on your door with suitcases in hand. HA LOL (Sooooo not kidding!)

We had someone come look at our house on Friday, he then came back on Sunday and the realtor told me he really liked it and would probably be putting in an offer this week. Still no word on that. Ho hum, I'm really hoping this house sells instead of foreclosing. That would make it a lot easier for us to get out of the hole.

On some really happy news.... I am a GREAT AUNT!! Cassy had her baby on Saturday, April 25th at 12:19am. She was lucky to have our genetics. She had barely any labor pains and went only an hour and a half from the time it started with her water breaking to pushing him out. No drugs, to ripping or tearing. The doctor didn't even make it, he was delivered by the nurses. Madden James was 6lbs, 9oz and 19in long. YAYAY

Isn't he cute!! I can't tell who he looks like. I think he's a daddy's boy at this point. But he's so tiny, we'll have to wait until he gets some meat on his bones to really tell. Sooooo cute.

So that's where we're at right now. Still up in the air, but STAYING IN NEW JERSEY!! Woo HOOooo!! Cross all your fingers and toes, say a prayer to God or Ala or whomever, do a fire dance, I don't care, just send us some good vibes people!!

I just made the best Beef Barley Soup EVER!! And of course it was a total accident like most of my food.

I made a pot roast for dinner. Did the normal deal with that, floured and seasoned the meat, shoved some garlic into it, seared it with oil, added water half way up and threw a lid on it. Oh, I threw in a couple beef bouillon cubes in it too. An hour or so later, I tasted the broth and it was very bland so I added salt, pepper and some garlic salt. A while later I added chopped onion, fresh tomatoes and carrots. Let it finish cooking. When it was done there was a ton of liquid left so I went to make gravy with it. Added some flour but as it was thickening, I was thinking of soup. So I didn't let it get to thick.

When dinner was over, I took all the left over meat, chopped it up, threw in all the left over carrots, added a half a bag of barley and some more water. I then turned the stove back up and walked away. Uhmmmm and forgot about it. OOOPPSSS. Hee hee hee. When the kids came in for the meds/vitamins at bed time, I walked into the kitchen and said, OH CRAP!! I ran over to it and discovered that unstirred barley burns to the bottom of the pan. Ooops again. So I dumped it into another pot and scrapped the unburnt layer off the bottom of the pan and put it in the other. I stirred and tasted and WAAPOW!! IT WAS AWESOME! HA, gotta love oopses. I'll have to make sure to burn it every time I make it now. Hee hee, or maybe just figure out how to make it taste like that without burning it. Oh man, that's so much harder.

Picked up the kids from my inlaws today (they slept over last night) and took them to the park. I ran home and got the bat and ball and we played that for a while. I climbed through all the playground and even went down the slide (it was nice to fit on it). We had a good day.

Last night while the kids were at grandma and grandpa's, John and I went with the gang to a tricky tray. It was lots of fun. We won a bunch of games and a basket of italian food, pasta, sauces, dipping oil. Yummo!

(Sorry, jumping around on times here)

On the way to drop the kids off, we were chatting in the car and I can't remember what exactly was said (mommy brain) but my dear, sweet daughter ... Something was said about "10 years ago" and Calli says "10 years ago? That's when the dinosaurs were here, isn't it Mamma?" Oh my lord in heaven, Yes honey, I used to ride the dinosaurs to work every day. Those damn things crapped everywhere and were so loud. Not to mention that you had to keep them from eating you on the way. Oh boy, I'm old!

Can you imagine what it will be like when our kids have kids? I mean, so much has changed in just my life time. Our kids don't know what a black and white tv is, or what it's like to GET UP to change the 13 channels you had to choose from. They don't know what a rotary dial telephone is or how to go a day without a cell! They don't know what it's like to have no choice but to go outside and play cause there sure as hell wasn't anything to do in the house. They will never know the joy of sitting in the "way back" of the station wagon that has the roll down rear hatch window. (Thank God Mom never had an accident with us back there.) They wont know that computers were for rich people and even if you did have one, it was only really used for book keeping or typing letters since DOS didn't offer up easy game play. No internet, no cell phones, no IPods, no game systems. Just pure, unadulterated sunshine, air, a bike, or a bat and ball. Sometimes I think how nice it would be to go back to that, and then I reach from my cell to call and tell someone. HA I don't think so! Time marches on. What will this world look like in another 20 years. I can't even imagine.

Wow, I really rambled on there. hmmm interesting.

Shockingly, I'm actually feeling a little better about the move. I spent Monday on the phone with folks from the FL board of education. I got the right people this time and got to hear the things I needed to hear.

They are well prepared for all of Nick's needs. They will evaluate his IEP as soon as I get it to them and work on placement. They said that if the school district I am in does not have the services he requires, I can put him in any of the other public schools I want. Most of the public schools offer special programs for kids like Nick. If that is also not appropriate, they have Charter schools that he can go too which are even more specialized. If neither of these systems will work for him, then he can go to a specialized school as a last resort (that's the one you have to get scholarships for). Both women I spoke with were very well informed.

By some miracle, the weekend that I will be down there house hunting is the same weekend that they are having an Autism Festival. In going to this, I will be able to meet most of the teachers, the doctors in the area, the psychiatrist, the therapist, the people who run summer programs, basically everyone that I will need for his care, treatment and education will be at this event. How perfect is that!! It made me relax sooooo much, I can't even tell you. It was like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. It took me 6 + months and a nervous breakdown when I had to find him all that the first time. The thought of having to do that again was daunting.

Although I'm still not 100% happy about this move, I'm at least not panicking that it will be a devastating decision for Nick. I think that was my biggest fear. He's doing so well in this school and finally had all his treatment in place, I was terrified to change that. But it looks like it will be ok. PHHHeeewwwww.

So now my only distress is to leave my friends and family. I can't tell you how much it hurts. I can't imagine not being able to go over to Shell's for no reason (which I plan to do today hee hee) or do game night, work out with Lea every morning, or have my mom stop over after work, or go to her house for the day so the kids can race around the yard and feed the deer. But, the phones work. I plan to be a telephone nuisance.

Trust me, I have gone over and over it in my head. I have tried my damndest to figure out how we could stay, but it's just not an option. I would have to get a full time job, which wouldn't be a big deal except for the fact that Calli starts Kindergarten in Sept. so I would have to be allowed an 1 1/2 for lunch to pick her up and drop her off. Not to mention that Nick can not go to an after school program so I would have to be home by 3:30. No one will hire me to work from 8:30 - 2:30 with an hour and a half lunch and still pay me over $45,000 a year. It just wont happen. So the decision is made. And although it wont make everyone happy, it's the only option there is.

So be happy for me. Encourage me. Tell me all the great things about living in FL. Send me happy vibes about all of it cause if everyone keeps telling me that we can't go cause they'll miss us, I'm going to cry for the next 2 months straight!! HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY!!!

I will never peal a potato again!! Check this out!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4W0qIPJmoo

At first I thought my gloom and doom feelings were to be paid attention too. Like something was going to happen. Then I thought, Oh you know what, I'm PMSing, which usually gives me that gloom and doom feeling. Then I find out from other family members that I'm not alone. My one cousin saw the spirit of one of our Great Aunt's (who has not passed yet, by the way), my sister has been having dreams of our old home town and a lot of fighting and general bad feelings, my other cousin in CA has even been feeling off and that something is about to happen. So far, my Godmother's long time boyfriend (loooonnnngggg time) passed away suddenly. That's one. It comes in threes around here. I hate the waiting. Although I don't want anything bad to happen, when I know it's going too, I just want to get it over with. Arg.

I haven't been getting a lot of sleep lately. I realized that even with all John's bitching about the lack of his sleep, he's still getting almost twice as much as I am. I'm always tired during the day and then at night, I'm wide awake. I can't seem to fall asleep. I'm usually up till around 1am and then I have to get up with Nick at 6:30. 5 1/2 hours sleep just doesn't do it for me. I've tried taking sleeping pills, but I'm so sensitive to medicine that, yes it knocks me out, but then I can't get up! Yesterday, I was just sooooo tired. After dinner, I took a nice, extremely hot bath. John was so sweet. He came in with candles and turned down all the lights for me. Awww. He even gave me a back rub. I don't know if it was the bath, the massage or the complete lack of sleep, but by 10 pm I was out! YAY me! And I got up this morning and didn't feel like I had to go back to sleep or fall over. Those extra few hours did me good. Now if only I could figure out how to do that every night without having to take baths and get massages (not that I minded!)

Oh, last night we had a super yummy dessert! I had run to the store for ketchup (meatloaf night) and I saw that they had strawberries on sale and they looked good. They also had those little sponge cake rounds things that they always have with berries to make like strawberry shortcake. I looked at the label and saw that there was a TON of sugar in those so was about to change my mind when I saw sugar free ones!! YAY I also found sugar free (calorie free, fat free, everything free) chocolate dipping sauce. I know that sounds like it would be gross, but it's made by the company that makes some of my favorite salad dressings which are also free of everything so I thought I would try it. And I grabbed some spray cool whip (which has less than 1 gram of sugar in it). So I sliced up the strawberries and sprinkled a little of a new sweetener I found (viu or something... just like splenda but doesn't have the funky after taste). After dinner I took my little cakes, scooped some chocolate sauce in the center, topped it with the berries and the whipped cream and VIOLA!! A completely yummy dessert with only about 5 grams of sugar (natural berry sugars). The kids skipped the berries. Calli likes strawberries, but didn't want to mix them with the other stuff and Nick doesn't like them at all. So they just had the cake, chocolate and cream. It was sooooo yummy I can't even tell you. Which only proves that I'm PMSing because all I can think about is eating! And that sucks cause I can hardly eat anything! WAH!

5 More pounds until I hit the 100 pound weight loss mark! Sooner or later. I need to start working out more. We had to take off most of last week because the kids were home sick and of course I can't seem to get my ass in gear to do it by myself. Damn elliptical broke! Anyway, I hope to find a cheap gym to join once we move.

Ok, off to dress my kid so we can go do the aforementioned work out. Tah.

Ok, totally crazy morning. I had a dream last night that I was hanging out with my old ex-friend (strange) that we were in Rockaway (my old home town) and watching some kind of dancing parade at my old school. Then we walked back to my old house and we were drinking beer (strange, I don't drink beer). When I woke up, my head was pounding like I had a hangover. WTF!

My head was pounding so bad I thought I would take a hot shower. As I was in the shower, I just had this feeling of impending doom. When I got out, I looked in the mirror and my face had exploded with my rosacea. That usually only happens when I'm severely stressed. I went out and smoked a ciggy and all these thoughts started racing through my head. Like, I had to call my sister to tell her that our Aunt died. Then it switched to my Mom died and I had to plan her funeral. That people were calling about the house and I was just telling them I couldn't deal with that right now because my mother had just passed away. I was thinking about how I was going to tell my sisters, how I was going to put it all together. I then started yelling at myself to stop thinking like that (I believe in that whole think about, bring about thing). But that sense of something horrible about to happen wont leave me. I just kept thinking, you need to call Mom right now.

I did call her and she's fine, but in my family, when people feel that something bad is going to happen, we go on red alert because we're usually right. I'm only about 50/50 on my feelings unless it's a cop up ahead on the road, then I'm always right, but the rest of the women in my family are usually dead on. So the word is being spread to see if anyone else is feeling it. My sister Joanne is usually the first one to feel it, but it's too early to call her right now. I'm hoping this is one of my off feelings cause this one is bad, very bad. I don't like it.

Ok, off that subject. On to my sick house. Nick was sick with fevers and a cough the beginning of the week. Then John got a cold. Mostly congestion, but of course he's dying! LOL MEN! Now Calli's got a cough and she said this morning that she has a tummy ache and a headache. Nick still has a nasty cough, but no more fevers. John's still dying. Oh lord. I pray I don't get it. My house would fall down if I was sick. God forbid MOM gets sick! Although, I have to say, I kinda like it when the kids are sick. They're so calm and snuggly. LOL I know. I'm a horrible mother, but all you mom's out there are thinking the same thing, don't deny it!

My house is cold this morning. We're almost out of wood. Probably only have a day or so left, but I really don't want to have to pay for another cord. I don't think we're going to need it and I don't want to waste the money. Of course, you know what's going to happen. We don't get anymore and then the temp drops to nothing for the next month and we freeze. Arg. At least we haven't run out this year. One of our neighbors has been getting it for us, and cheap to boot!

Ok, well, I guess I should go do something with my disaster of a house. My poor daughter hasn't had any jammas in a week or so cause she only has a couple that fit and they're all in the laundry that I've been desperately avoiding. Maybe if she didn't change pj's 15 times a day, she would have them to wear at night!

Casino Night was lots of fun as usual. They had a ton of great food and double the prizes as last year. But there was also double the people so I didn't really get a lot of play time in. It was nearly impossible to find an open seat! The rest of the gang played craps all night, but I'm not really good at that game. We did a little texas hold'um and black jack. Unfortunately, we didn't win anything. Shell and Tim and Allison cleaned up though!! Allison won a month of gymnastics at the place where Calli goes (the same prize I won last year) and she was sweet enough to give it to me! Very awesome! Shelly won a godiva basket, tickets to a kids play place, dinner at the Mohegan Sun and a casino night (TOTALLY COOL! - they bring in the tables and a croupier and everything for you). They last two were from the big ticket prizes. They were very lucky. Of course I would have liked to win some stuff, but that's ok. It was still a fun night.

We went to a birthday party for one of my mom's co-workers kids on Saturday night. It was a little weird. First, we didn't know anyone there. Then, they asked that all the kids get dressed up. Like formal dress. And the party didn't start until after 6pm, kinda late. They had a ton of food which was all good and some of it was really spicy. The father is Jamaican so there was a lot of that kind of food. They also had a live Jamaican band, who by the way, were outstanding. They sang everything, not just reggae and let me tell you, you would have thought they were playing cd's. Yeah, that good! By 10pm, we left. It was just getting too late and we were all tired.

Yesterday was an easier day. We cleaned for a showing that lasted all of 2 minutes. John fixed my car, brakes and something with the cat converter that was all busted up. I took the kids to go see the Oscar Mayer Wiener Mobile! The kids played outside for a little while until Nick came in saying he was tired. 20 min later I go upstairs to find him passed out in his bed. Wow, I thought, Mom must have really worn him out. When he woke up later, he was running a high fever and had a very painful cough. Oh boy, not worn out, sick. Great! This morning I got up and checked his temp again and it was back up, so I sent him back to bed and called him out of school. Right now he's just laying on the couch looking miserable. Poor kid. We'll see if I can get his fever down. I don't really want to take him to the dr. just so they can tell me he has a cold. That's so annoying.

Oh well, let's just cross our fingers that no one else gets it. Ta For Now

Need your help

My dearest friend Michelle makes these wonderful cakes (as you know!). She would love to start a business doing it but is having trouble with the pricing issue. Below is a link to her Facebook photo album with pictures of some of her cakes. If you could please go on there and set a price for each cake so we can kind of average out and get a better idea of what she should charge. Please BE HONEST! Don't worry about her feelings or any of that. She wants your honest opinion of how much you think a cake like that should cost. And don't let other people's prices bias you either. State you're own opinion. Don't worry about the first few cakes. Those are from when she was just learning hee hee hee, BOY has she improved! Pretty much just look at the ones I posted prices too. Happy pricing and thanks for your help!!

She said she opened this up to the public, so the link should work. Please let me know if it doesn't.

http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/album.php?aid=16152&id=1055700268

You know you're a paranoid mother when....

Last night, Calli, John and I were sitting on the couch. We were just playing and talking and I notice a very ugly looking mole on Calli's neck just below her jaw line. I touch it and feel that it's very raised and realize that it wasn't there a day or two ago. I immediately got very concerned and planned to call the dr. first thing in the morning. John looked at it and agreed that it was unusual. After a minute or two he called her over to look at it again. Then said to me, what did she have for lunch? I said, pb&j. He then proceeds to scrape off the "mole". Seems it was just a bit of jelly. hee hee, oops. I guess maybe it's better to jump to a conclusion concerning your kids health then to not notice at all.... right???

Speaking of Calli, the child NEVER STOPS TALKING! Mom said I was like that too and now I wonder how the hell that woman is sane at all. My God! It's just non-stop. She can talk about anything, and if she doesn't have a subject, she starts making up stories. It amazes me what she comes up with. Lately, I've just been sitting there watching her talk and watching the faces she makes (which are hysterical). She has such an imagination. I really have to try to get some of it on tape.

She's so unlike Nick. Nicky never really had an imagination. He never made up stories or played games like that. I'm sure it's an Aspie thing, but it could also be a boy thing. I feel like I've lost touch with him lately. He comes home from school and vanishes to his room. He doesn't really talk to me anymore. Even on the weekends, it's like he's lost in his own little world upstairs building legos, which he's amazing at. He comes down all proud of himself for what he's made. It's great, but I feel like I've lost him a little bit. I don't know how to interact with my kids. I don't know what to do with them "together" that would be fun for me too. I don't remember being one of those "imagination" kids like Calli. So when she wants to play like that, I actually don't know what to do. Weird.

So if anyone out there has activities that I can do with the kids that we can all enjoy and doesn't cost anything, fire away. I'm hoping that when we're in a warmer climate we can be outside playing sports and stuff. (HA!! Did you hear that? ME wanting to play sports!)

We went to the park on Sunday and that was fun. Nick brought his scooter and while John took Calli into the play area, Nick and I did a lap around the entire park. I had to run most of the way to keep up with him, and I didn't die. It was really nice. Before we left, we all went around again. John was so out of breath and I was fine. Hee hee, I told him, from now on whenever he wants a snack or to eat garbage, to remember that walk.

Weight update, I'm down to 167 - that's 90 pounds folks. My work out buddy injured her back so we haven't been able to work out (starting again today). And of course I can't seem to get myself to move without her. Although, I've been helping my friend Margaret clear up and organize her Mary Kay stock room and that was a little bit of a work out. Standing for hours and lots of bending. I felt muscles I didn't know I had! Hopefully I can get myself back on track now.

Ok, off to my workout. ttfn

Just incase you were wondering why I'm moving.... Here's an email my mom sent that's floating around about the joys of living in NJ.

Living in Northern New Jersey

Aug. 12 - Moved into our new home in Northern New Jersey . It is so beautiful here.. The hills and river valleys are so picturesque.. I have a beautiful old oak tree in my front yard. Can hardly wait to see the change in the seasons. This is truly God's Country.

Oct. 14 – New Jersey is such a gorgeous place to live, one of the real special places on Earth; I guess that’s why they call it the Ga rden State . The leaves are turning a multitude of different colors. I love all of the shades of reds, oranges and yellows, they are so bright... I want to walk through all of the beautiful hills and spot some white tail deer. They are so graceful; certainly they must be the most peaceful creatures on Earth. This must be paradise.

Nov. 11 - Deer season opens this week. I can't imagine why anyone would want to shoot these elegant animals. They are the very symbol of peace and tranquility here in New Jersey . I hope it snows soon. I love it here!

Dec. 2 - It snowed last night.. I woke to the usual wonderful sight: everything covered in a beautiful blanket of white. The oak tree is magnificent. It looks like a postcard. We went out and swept the snow from the steps and driveway..The air is so crisp, clean and refreshing. We had a snowball fight. I won, and the snowplow came down the street. He must have gotten too close to the driveway because we had to go out and shovel the end of the driveway again. What a beautiful place. Nature in harmony. I love it here!

Dec.. 12 - More snow last night. I love it! The plow did his cute little trick again. What a rascal. A winter wonderland. I love it here!

Dec. 19 - More snow - couldn't get out of the driveway to get to work in time. I'm exhausted from all of the shoveling. And that snowplow!

Dec. 21 - More of that white sh*t coming down. I've got blisters on my hands and a kink in my back. I think that the snowplow driver waits around the corner until I'm done shoveling the driveway. A$$hole.

Dec. 25 - White Christmas? More freakin' snow. If I ever get my hands on the sonofabitch who drives that snowplow, I swear I'll castrate him. And why don't they use more salt on these roads to melt this crap??

Dec. 28 - It hasn't stopped snowing since Christmas. I have been inside since then, except of course when that SOB "Snowplow Harry" comes by. Can't go anywhere, cars are buried up to the windows. Weather man says to expect another 10 inches. Do you have any idea how many shovelfuls 10 inches is ??

Jan. 1 - Happy New Year? The way it's coming down it won't melt until the 4th of July! The snowplow got stuck down the road and the sh*thead actually had the balls to come and ask to borrow a shovel! I told him I'd broken six already this season.

Jan. 4 - Finally got out of the house.. We went to the store to get some food and a goddamn deer ran out in front of my car and I hit the b*stard. It did $3,000 in damage to the car. Those beasts ought to be killed. The hunters should have a longer season if you ask me.

Jan. 27 - Warmed up a little and rained today. The rain turned the snow into ice and the weight of it broke the main limb of the oak tree in the front yard and it went through the roof. I should have cut that old piece of sh*t into fireplace wood when I had the chance.

May 10 - Took my car to the local garage. Would you believe the whole underside of the car is rusted away from all of that damn salt they dump on the road? Car looks like a bashed up, heap of rusted cow sh*t.

May 23 - Sold the car, the house, and moved to Florida . I can't imagine why anyone in their freakin' mind would ever want to live in the God forsaken State of New Jersey .

Ya know, I have my moments when this move seems like a really bad idea. Where the thought of leaving family and friends and my house is heatbreaking. I had that moment 2 nights ago. Lying in bed, crying. And then.... something happens to remind me why we're leaving. The next morning I woke up, got in the shower, washed my hair, put in conditioner and POOF, no more water. That's right folks, the pipes froze AGAIN!! 2 days without water this time. It finally came back yesterday afternoon. Although I still have my doubts, things like this dull them quite a bit.

It's Friday! If you haven't signed up for Casino Night, today is the LAST DAY to do it. Please come, it'll be loads of fun, I promise!!

I have a lot of catch up to do. Since we didn't have water, I have a ton of dishes and laundry that need to be done. Yippeee!

So after all that snow last weekend... this weekend it's supposed to be in the 60's! WTF? I don't get it.

What else??? I don't know. I can't think straight today, I'm so tired! Off to run some errands.

The speech was no big deal people. It's just kind of a visual for the people attending. When you're really fat, it's hard to picture yourself as thin. So seeing people come in who have had the surgery and seeing their before pictures, really helps them decide. It was really like a 15 min thing with a couple other post op people. You didn't miss anything, I promise. LOL Well, you missed me showing off my ass.

I booked my flight this morning. YAYAY!! I feel better knowing that's done.

Below are some pics from today. Damn winter.

And you wonder why we're moving south???

9 inches and counting (notice me with the ruler)

Feeling yucky today. I was feeling kinda off yesterday, but put it down to PMS. Today I woke up with a headache (never a good start) and then everything I ate made me pukey. I'm sure it's PMS plus lack of following the rules. Not enough protein, not enough vitamins, not enough fluids, all that jazz. I took my vitamins and drank a shake today, plus I drank a bunch of water and arizona tea (diet of course). Now I just have to make sure I do it every day. I really need to get my ass in gear.

I went for my check up with the surgeon on Monday and he was pretty pleased with me (except for the vitamins and protein). He invited me to speak at their seminar. So Wednesday I did just that. I went to the seminar that I went to before my surgery where they tell you everything about it. I stood up there and told them what I'd done in the last 6 months. (the good and the bad) I brought my before pictures too. I even showed off my ass!! LOL, hell, it's a lot smaller than it was. Afterwards, people came up to me and thanked me and asked some questions. It was nice. Kind of an ego booster but also helps them too.

I'm booking my flight from FL for the end of April. Of course when I wanted to go is the weekend after Easter and the prices were doubled!! Damn Thieves! Then I was thinking the weekend before Easter, but since I'm driving John's car down, leaving it there and flying back, that would leave me without a car for over a month.... I don't think so! So, it'll be the weekend of the 26th. I'll leave here Wednesday afternoon, get there Thursday some time and leave probably Monday (cheaper to fly than Sunday). That will give me plenty of time to get the lay of the land, see a ton of houses and hopefully secure one.

As for our house. We've dropped the price to $250,000 in hopes of a nibble. We've figured out that we're not going to make anything at this point, so we're going to submit any offer we get. Which we haven't as of yet. Either way, we're leaving in early May. I spoke to both mortgage companies and they are both on board for a short sale. Doing the "deed in lieu" where you just sign over the house, we found out, is actually considered a foreclosure. It just skips all the legal crap. So we'll stick with the short sale and just let everyone that's looking know that it's basically "no offer to low". At this point it's not up to us. It will be submitted to the bank and they will make the decision. We owe 230,000 I'm assuming they'll take 200 or possibly even lower. We owe 160 on the first and 70 on the second. So you do the math. Doesn't matter to us anymore. We were hoping to get like 245-250 so we could walk away with a couple thousand, but I don't think it's gonna happen. Oh well.

For those of you who want to go to Casino Night, it's LAST CALL. This is a charity event for the Children's Tumor Foundation. It's on March 13th. Friday, March 6th (THIS FRIDAY) is the last day to register. It's so much fun. The price includes dinner, gambling, a chinese auction and open bar. They are also having some vendors this year and the "Gold Guy". So if you have old gold or jewelry that you don't want anymore, he's paying cash on the spot for it. Pretty cool. It's definitely a fun night. I'm hoping my luck holds out from last year!! If you'd like to go, post a comment with your email, or send me an email and I'll forward you all the info. Again, FRIDAY is your last day to register.

The snow is coming.... again. Bah Humbug. They're calling for 6-12 inches tonight. Oh Joy.

What else.... hmmm... yeah, I got nuthin!

To the person who posted about the house. Unfortunately, we owe $230,000 in mortgage. And in today's market it's actually worth about between $200,000 and $250,000. I wish I could let it go for what you're offering, but we can't. Sorry. We are going into Short Sale and the listing price will be dropping to $250,000 as of today. Just an FYI

The party went well. Lots of food of course and we really didn't have that many left overs. Calli got lots of much needed clothes and some toys that are now all over. We spent yesterday getting Barbie tattoos and putting on make-up. YAY! LOL

John decided to take the day off Monday to help me clean up in case someone wanted to see the house. Of course, as fate would have it, someone called in the morning wanting to show it in the afternoon. So, John helped me clean everything. I spent most of the day upstairs putting the kids rooms back in order. We got it all done and then the realtor called and said, we're outside, but they said it's too close to the road, so we're not coming in. Bastards. Ya know, I even told her when she called that we had a party the day before and we'd have to do a lot of cleaning. You could have a little common courtesy and at least come in. Idiots!

We're dropping the price of the house $10,000 this week and will do it again next month. Hopefully that will do something. When I did the numbers, we figured we're not going to get anything out of it either way. Knowing what the market is doing and what people will pay, I doubt anyone is going to give us more than $240,000. For us to make any money, we'd need more than that. We were hoping for $250, that would at least get us down there and we would have been able to pay everyone off that we owe. Not gonna happen. So, it's pointless now. Short sale starts the end of April, so I think we'll probably leave the beginning of May and let what will be, be. Ho Hum

Above are a bunch of pics. The ones of her in the brown dress are from her actual birthday and the presents from us. Nick was so cute. He went and got his stuffed snowman and two of his match box cars and wrapped them for her. The rest are from the party. Check out the awesome "Cake by Shelly"!

5 years ago today...

I was enjoying company at my house after being on bed rest for 2 months. My sister was here with her kids and she was making a big turkey dinner for us. At around 7 I got up to make Nick's plate and WOOSH the mayhem began. Ambulances and doctors were called, paramedics started rushing in, the medivac helicopter was in the air. Rushing to the hospital while trying to avoid bumps that were making the gushing blood worse (sorry TMI) Being whisked off to labor and delivery, and then having an episode of ER begin. Nurses scrambling, rushing in and out, machines being hooked up everywhere, my doctor coming in and looking very concerned, complete chaos! Being wheeled off to the OR with urgent looks on everyone's faces. And then with about 15 min, seeing my VERY tiny baby girl being whisked off to the NICU. John telling me "She's small, but she looks good." Hearing her little cry that got her the nickname of "Mouse".

I can't believe it's been 5 years. It goes by so fast. For those of you expecting or have infants, cherish every moment. Even when you haven't slept in days and the baby has collic and is driving you insane... hold onto every moment, because there will come a time that you look down and your 2 month old is now 5 and you feel like you missed everything.

I'm being adventurous for the party. Normally I make store bought appetizers and everyone likes them. But this time, I'm making everything from scratch. Hopefully I'm not biting off more than I can chew. Here's the menu...

Sweet & sour shrimp puffs

Cheesy Chicken & artichoke bites

Mini ham & cheese calzones

BBQ meatballs

Avocado stuffed sliders

And for the kids..

pigs in a blanket

chicken nuggets

and possibly a ziti

Anyone who's ever been to a party at my house knows I like to feed my guests. I actually think it will cost a lot less for me to make all this then to buy all the frozen crap. I always cater more to the adults even when it's a kids party, just cause the kids are so busy playing, they never really eat anyway. As long as I can make something for them to shove in there mouths before cake, it's fine.

Let me know if you'd like anything else that I haven't listed. I'm up for the challenge... I think. LOL

Calli is very excited that so many people are coming. She's been asking me all morning when everyone is gonna get here. I keep telling her they aren't coming till Sunday, but she insists that TODAY is her birthday, so everyone should come today! LOL

I went through all my Mary Kay stuff yesterday. Holy crap there was a lot. There's nothing over $25 and that price is for some of the sets I have that were holiday things. Most of the rest is under $15. I have a lot of make up left, so please... take it all!!

For those of you that are coming to the party Sunday, I am selling off my Mary Kay inventory. I can't bring it all down there with me, it would just be silly. When I do decide to start the business back up again (yes Margaret, I said WHEN not if) I'd like to have fresh inventory anyway. I have a mishmosh of items and I'll most likely be selling everything at cost to get rid of it. I'll just put everything out on a table and ya'll can shop.

If anyone who's not coming wants something, let me know. I'll check to see if I have it.

Just an FYI

An ENTIRE WEEK!!! Nick is off all week. UG!! Don't get me wrong, I love my son more than life itself, but to have the two of them home together for a whole week.... I'm going to pull my hair out. They fight allllllllll the time. I wish it was warm out so we could go do something. But of course it's not. It's cold and muddy and gross out. YUCK! I'll think of something I guess. I know Shelly and I will be working on the cake, so that will take up some time.

John is getting much more antsy about this move. He actually wanted me to pack the house up so we could leave in the next week. I told him no. Not only can we not just leave the house, but Nick needs to finish the school year. I think he can make it through another couple of months.

I still don't know if I'm ready for this. I have a lot of mixed feelings. Yes, Florida is sunny and warm and would be good for the kids. BUT, It's very far away. AND, although he bitches about the cold, I know John's going to be bitching about the heat even more. I am actually pretty scared about doing this. That's probably why I'm not packing anything. I figure I have till the end of May to make up my mind and then I need to start packing. It's just realy scary. I know we'll go anyway, but it's still weird.

I've changed a lot recently. I don't know if it's the thought of moving or that I just finally grew up a little. Especially when it comes to cleaning. Anyone who's been in my house knows that I HATE cleaning. It's always trashed. When you came over, you just expected a disaster. Now it's clean all the time. I mean, like, you can see my kitchen counters. The dishes are done, the floors are vacuumed, the clothes are put away. My car is actually clean too! How bizarre?!? I wonder if being a stay at home mom finally kicked in.

I've become more forgiving too. I actually spoke to my ex-best friend. Nothing in depth, but a kind of catch up. Not that I want to go back down that road. AND!!! I actually let John invite his parents to Calli's birthday party. Now, if you were on the fence about coming to the party, THAT should make you want to run here. It should be VERY interesting. I'm taking bets now to see if she even speaks to me. hee hee hee

Maybe all these changes are good. Maybe it's a signal to me that it's time for a lot of changes and this move is what I need. Hell, maybe I just need to go to Sea World.

Just a little side note, Good luck today Tim. I know it's going to be hard, but know that he wouldn't have wanted anyone but you to do it. You're a good man.

Aaahhhh, it's so nice out. It's actually sitting around 60! I actually didn't have to wear a coat. NICE!! Of course, as with everything else in my life, it's just a tease. It's supposed to get cold again tomorrow. It'll be back in the 20's and 30's by Friday. YUCK.

Not much going on with the house. We had one showing on Sunday and that was it. Bah humbug. Why can't it be easy for once. Why can't we just get an offer and make it quick and easy. NOOoooooo everything has to be hard! Oh well.

I'd love to go to the park or something today, but everything is going to be sopping wet and muddy. Not that much fun to slide down a muddy, slushy slide. Maybe we'll just go for a walk.

Don't forget Calli's party everyone. Sunday, February 22nd at around say... 1pm?? Sounds good. (Shelly, I found a little mermaid doll!) As for gifts, John is crying about it since we just cleared out a ton of their toys. LOL Anyway, she's in a size 6. She likes Barbie, littlest pest shop, anything with animals, art stuff, pretty much any of that girly crap out there. It will be a Little Mermaid party so feel free to dress as your favorite character!! Any Disney character is fine. It doesn't have to be from that movie. Has anyone noticed that Little Mermaid doesn't have a mother..... come to think of it, not many of the disney characters have mother's (besides evil step ones). The only one I can think of is Sleeping Beauty. Hmmm, interesting. Did good old Walt have abandonment issues??

That's all for now. Enjoy the weather while it lasts!

Oh, below are some pics from the cake Shelly made me. (thanks to Liz and John) They don't do it justice! Tim, send me the ones you took too.

Well, the house is finally done! It took FOR - E - VER!!!!! We had our first showing yesterday and it seemed to go well. I had a dream the other night that someone came in with a full price offer as long as we could be out by the weekend. (Shelly didn't like that idea) LOL I doubt that would happen, but a full price offer would be nice. I'll be interested to hear what they thought of the place (Rich, let me know). We can't get it any cleaner than it already is, so it'll just be up to the house now. I'm sure we'll get the same complaints as last time, which mostly revolved around the dormered ceilings in the upstairs bedrooms. Cross your fingers folks!

We had a good weekend (besides all the cleaning). My little cousin came over to watch the kids for us Saturday night so we could go to a party at our friends Mark & Kim's. When I went to pick her up, I actually borrowed clothes from my cousin Valerie to wear to the party. HOW COOL IS THAT??? For those of you that don't know, Val has always been super fit and skinny. One of those really annoying women who don't really have to work to hard on their body because they're born with it. Don't we hate those people!?! But, we love them anyway. Thanks for the duds Val! And thanks for sitting Crystal. You left before I could give you some dough. I'll drop some off to you.

The party was lots of fun. Played a little beer pong. It was so nice to just be out without the kids. And my bestest friend Shelly made me an awesome cake!! (all those that took pictures, please send them to me so I can post them.) Wait until you see it!! If you wish to purchase a cake from Michelle, please let me know and I'll forward on your information to her. She's making Calli's cake for her birthday on the 22nd. Little Mermaid!

I tried to download a couple pics of me before we left for the party, but of course my stupid camera wont cooperate AGAIN!! Piece a crap! Anyway. I'm down to about 170. 13 pounds until I hit the 100 mark. Can you believe I've lost almost 100 pounds in 6 months? How crazy is that. I really thought that at this point I'd be pretty happy with the way I look, but I'm not. I think I could stand to loose another 30-40 pounds. I still have a big tummy and legs. We'll see once I'm down to 150 what I look like. Tummy tuck and boob job are definitely required! Especially the boob job. I'm so sad about the girls. They just aren't there any more. No matter what anyone says, I think your boobs are what makes a woman sexy. Big or small really doesn't matter, but they have to look great in and out of a bra. At this point, mine look crappy in a bra and aren't allowed to be shown without one do to the fact that they look like pancakes. Sad, very very sad.

Speaking of boobs... another Classic Callihan.... Sitting on the couch the other day, she starts flopping my boobs around and going, Mamma, why are your boobies down here. They don't go there, they're supposed to be up here. Why do they do that Mamma? - I don't know honey, just cause - You know what I think Mamma? I think they're sleeping. - I think you're right honey. ROFLMAO

I wonder if there's charities out there that donate money to poor women who desperately need tummy tucks and boob jobs?

So, no one has come forward to pack my house for me out of the goodness of their hearts. Oh well, guess I'm stuck doing it. Have I mentioned how much I hate doing that?

This house has to be "show" worthy by the 8th. That gives me a week. ho hum. I seem to do much better on the weekends. I'm so tired during the week. I think it's cause I have to wake up at the crack of dawn and then I work out. (that whole theory about working out waking you up is CRAP). I swear, I get nothing done during the day. It's after dinner that I start working. Weird. Guess I'm just a night person. On the weekends, I get to sleep in, and John's home so it motivates me somehow to get shit done.

We're having a birthday party for Callihan on 22nd of February. It's the big "5". It will also most likely be our last birthday party here for any of us, so I expect everyone to come. By then the house should be freaking spotless!

Speaking of parties, we are actually going to a party. All by ourselves, no kids!! How awesome is that? My cousin is coming to stay with the kids for the night since the party is in Weehawken and we'll most likely be VERY late coming home. The party is on my birthday too, so it's like a two-fer! How great is that birthday present! A night out with no kids. AAahhhh, can't beat that! Guitar Hero/Beer Pong, here I come!!

So, Calli has been very observant lately. Last night she was laying with her head in my lap being very cuddly when she starts poking at my "second" chin. She says "Mom, why do you have all this skin down here? Why do you have two chins?" Just cause honey. "You have another chin just like Grandma, you look just like a Grandma Mamma!!" Thanks Honey, you're the best!!

This morning she looked at me and asked "Mamma, why do you have a mustache? Only BOYS have mustaches!! You're so funny Mamma!!" Thanks again Babe! She just likes to find the best in all of us. So sweet. (rolling of the eyes)

Gotta love a snow day - can you hear the sarcasm?

First of all, I have to say this.... Every school day I get up at 6:30 and have to DRAG Nick out of bed to get him ready for school. It's a fight every day. On the weekends, the kid is up by 6am or earlier. Last night I made the mistake of telling him he may not have school today, so when I got up at 6:30 to go check the snow phone line, who do I see sitting on the couch playing the Wii, that's right, my little monster. Arg. It just pisses me off to no end. If he doesn't have school, he up, if he does, it's a contest of wills.

Anyway, so now the kids are both home today and I'm trying very hard not to kill them. It's not like I can even let them go outside and play because the snow has now turned to freezing rain. So they are stuck in the house with me. JOY OF JOYS!! I'm trying very hard to clean and I swear, as soon as I get one thing done and go onto the next, they've destroyed the first thing. I have now banished them to their rooms.

John is out in this crap cause of course there's no rest for the trucker. His stops got messed up too, so his day is even longer. I always worry about him in weather like this. I try not to watch the news or traffic reports afraid to hear that a trucker went off the road or whatever. It's very nerve racking.

So, the mortgage company in FL called today. It seems that our credit is way too sucky and there is no way we'll be able to get a mortgage. I was very disappointed to hear that. I also expected John to be pretty pissed. He surprised me though and said, Oh well, that's ok, we'll just rent for a couple years. Ya know, I think this move is going to be very good for him. Just the thought of it has made him so much happier.

Ya know what my greatest wish right now is..... That we could hire someone to come in and pack up all this crap. That would be sooooo awesome. I could just sit on the couch and watch! Aaaahhhh. But, alas, that is not in the budget. Bah humbug.

Ok, I have to stop stalling and get moving here. And now my beautiful daughter is standing next to me whining in my ear. CALGON TAKE ME AWAY!

I'm tired. I went back to sleep this morning after Nick left and was out till 10am when Calli woke me up asking for breakfast. I think I'm starting to stress a bit over this move and money and all that jazz.

They're calling for another snow storm tomorrow. It says at least 6 inches possibly more. Lovely. At least in the cleaning out process I found the kids snow tube, so that's something. LOL

I called the mortgage company in FL today to see if we can even get a mortgage with our crappy credit and they said they'd call me back. We'd need a freaking miracle to actually be accepted. Cross your fingers and say a little prayer to whichever God you believe in, cause we're gonna need it. Oh, and add a quick and full price sale on this house to that prayer too please.

Speaking of God.... you all know I'm one of those non believer types, but lately I've been watching that Joel Osteen guy. Now, I may not necessarily believe what he's preaching, but I really like his messages. What does that mean?? I guess having faith in anything is better than no faith at all.

I screwed up my 2005 taxes! Arg. I had gotten a letter from the IRS a while ago saying I was being audited for it. Something about my expenses for the Mary Kay stuff. I of course did what I always do and put it in a pile to rot. Now that I'm starting to get certified letters, I actually pulled everything out today and figured it out. When I estimated miles, I had put 25,000 for the year when it should have been 2,500. Oh Great. Looks like we owe the IRS money too. Wonderful. Cause we just don't owe enough people. I wrote them a letter and printed out all the correct mileage, so we'll see what they say.

We're just waiting on John's w-2's so I can do our return. Hopefully we get a lot back cause that's what's gonna take us down to FL.

Rich came last night to sign the paperwork for the house. He's not happy with the price I wanted, but oh well. I can't do it any lower because even with the price we're set at, people always offer at least 20,000 less and that's barely going to be able to pay off the mortgages and the real estate fees. We're going to be extremely lucky to walk away with anything on this house. I have a feeling it's going to end up being a write off and we'll get nothing.

Can you tell I'm in a sour mood? I think I'm PMSing. And that added to the already heavy stress is making me a not nice person right now. BBBAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!

Anyway.... I sold a ton of stuff on ebay. I have to go through it all now and ship it out. That's the worst part. We sold our select comfort bed on Sunday and the guy called me when he got home and said they couldn't blow it up cause there was a rip in the air chamber. CRAP. I think that when we shoved it under the spare bed it must have caught on one of the wires. They paid us $300 for it and he only asked for $100 back. I thought that was very nice of him. He had called the company and they said it could be replaced for $138. So we still made $200 on a bed we don't use. That money has to go towards a car payment now.

I got rid of two huge boxes of toys yesterday too. I put them on freecycle and they were taken within 30 seconds. LOL That's good. We've cleared out so much, I'm very proud of myself. I'm going to tackle actual packing now. Not today though. Today, I'm taking a break. I might even go take a nap. We'll see.

Let's see, do I have any good news? Oh, my friend Erin gave me an award! She made me smile today. Thanks girl! What else..... hmmm, the dog crapped in the kennel again today, oh wait, no that goes in the bad news column..... I found protein shakes that taste decent and only cost $14!! That's definitely good news. I also found milk Calli likes. The soy milk she's allergic too and the rice milk was kinda nasty. But I found Almond milk. I got the chocolate kind and it's unsweetened, so I added a little chocolate syrup to it and it tastes pretty damn close to chocolate milk made with skim milk. YAY, now if the plain kind tastes ok, we'll be gold.

Ok, off to eat something since I haven't done that yet today... crap, it's 2:30. Not good. See Ya

Good news and bad news.

The good news is that it got a little warmer today (32 degrees woo hoo) and the pipes defrosted. We had gotten all the water running except the washer and the kitchen sink. They are all running now.

The bad news.... a pipe burst in the basement. Arg. AND, while John was down there fixing it and I was at the computer I heard the horrible sound of water spraying everywhere. The heater pipe right by the computer burst. Arg, water everywhere. So John drained out all the base boards since we don't use them anyway and fixed the other pipe. Then I packed up all our dirty clothes and the 2 dozen soaking wet towels and went to spend the day at the laundry matt since the washer still wasn't working then.

And you wonder why we want to move???

We went through all the boxes that where in the attic and I got rid of half of the stuff. John brought in a bunch from the garage and I got rid of a lot of that, have some on craigs list, some on ebay, some going to salvation army and some on freecycle. I found a box of about 100 cassette tapes. What the hell am I gonna do with those?? They're on freecycle if anyone wants them. LOL

I have 3 huge boxes to go through tonight and tomorrow that are filled with clothes and toys. It's all gotta go. How the hell did I become such a pack rat? I don't get it. I'm opening boxes of stuff I've had since high school. And not even good stuff. Just stupid shit.

I finally went through my box of pictures too. I threw out half of them. Some where people I didn't even remember anymore, some where people I didn't WANT to remember anymore, and the rest were doubles of doubles of doubles. LOL Oh Shelly, you should see the pics I found of you and Tim. HA LOL Young love! And Beth (Waring), I actually have a bunch of pictures for you that I thought you might like. Let's get together and I'll give them to you.

Ok, off to go through those boxes. I hate ebaying. Well, it's a love/hate relationship really. I love the money, but hate the work involved. I'm so freaking lazy.

Oh, weight check. 179 YAYAYAYAY FINALLY!!! I Lost a stinkin pound!! WOO HOOO!!

Below is a video from the other day when we took the kids out on the ice.

What a horrible morning. I woke up this morning and it was 50 degrees in here. So I put Nick in the bathroom to change since there's a heater in there and go out to get the fire going. I stop in my tracks when I notice a smell. Ug, the puppy pooped in his kennel and decided to spread it all over. GREAT. So I put him outside and he goes running back in. AAAHHHHH Tracking poo all over the floor, carpet and then jumping on the couch. Mother Fu***** Get him back outside and go to wash my hands that now have poo on them to find that we have no water!!! The freaking pipes froze.

That's it, I'm done. Shelly, take a deep breath and close your eyes. We're outta here. I've called the schools in Florida and got info on what needs to be done for Nick. We have a realtor sending us listings for houses to rent. I called my mom and said good-bye and I'm now looking for truck rentals. I've had it. I'm tired of always being broke, I'm tired of always being cold, worrying about having enough wood, running out of wood, worrying about the pipes freezing, worrying about the kids getting sick. It's all too much. Too Crazy. It's time for a change. Something new. Time to start over. If it doesn't work, oh well, at least we wont freeze to death.

We'll put the house on the market for a short sale and hope someone takes it. If not, it forcloses and we have to wait 10 years to buy. Oh well.

Wow, a week since I posted. Hmm well I guess I should do some catch up.

IT'S FREAKING COLD!!!!!!!! We got slammed with a snow storm over the weekend. It wasn't as bad as they predicted though. They had said a foot of snow and we only got about 5-6 inches. Not to bad. Now we're in the midst of some horrible arctic blast. With the wind chill we're feeling about -10. Not fun. At least we're not in North Dakota where it's -45. That's just insane. That's don't leave your house till spring weather. Every cold day pushes me closer to Florida!

Well, we went to the doctor today to get all of Nick's test results. It turns out that he is allergic to milk/dairy/casein. He also has a large yeast build up. She gave me an rx for the yeast that he will have to be on for 2 months and that should flush it out of his system. As for the milk... he needs to go on a casein free diet. Ho Hum. Not fun. BUT, at least it wasn't the gluten. THAT would have been a freakin nightmare. So for now, no milk, yogurt, cheese, butter, etc. We don't have to pull things made with milk yet. She said start slow and see how he does. Just pull the straight dairy for right now.

She did Calli's workup today too and said she can tell just by the look of her that her tests will come back most likely the same as Nicks. So might as well put everyone on the dairy free diet. Of course if the kids have to be on it, we'll do it too. Not exactly good parenting to drink a milkshake infront of your kids who can't have it. hee hee hee. So now I'm on the search for what we can and can't have and recipes on how to cook now without using dairy. This should be interesting.

Weight check. BLAH!!! I'm still sitting at 180. It's been a month now and the freaking scale hasn't moved!!! It's so annoying. Although, I know it's because I'm not getting in enough protein. I'm out of shake stuff and I haven't had a chance to get more. I'm going to do that tomorrow. Hopefully that will kick it off again.

Oh, I have to download the pictures but the other day we took the kids sneaker skating! We don't have ice skates, and hell if I'm gonna buy them. The kid down the road cleared a bunch of the lake in front of his house for a hockey rink and we brought the kids down to slide on the ice. Nick even got to play some hockey with Sean. John was pushing the kids along the ice. They had a blast. I'll put the picks on soon. It was kinda scary to stand on the lake. I was just so scared that I would here CCCCRRRAAACK!!!!!! and we'd all fall in. Not that I really had to worry since the lake is only 6 feet deep. LOL But still, it'd be cold!

Speaking of cold, my toes are froze... I'm going on the couch under the blankie. Stay warm folks!

This weather SUCKS!! I hate it. Ya know, when it's any other season you think, oh, winter's not to bad. And then you go for about a week with your toes so cold it hurts to stand and you remember.... IT SUCKS!!

John's on a Florida kick right now. He's always said, no way, it's too hot down there. Now, all of a sudden, he's like, that's it, sell everything and let's go. He even went so far as to have me check real estate down there. I did find something that was 5 bedrooms, 3 baths, in ground pool, needed a TON of work, basically like this house was and it was $18,000. That's right folks, 18,000. Like I said, it needed a lot of work. But even the stuff that was in move in condition was nothing. Most of it was under 100,000. CRAZY!!!

I don't know. I like the idea of change. I like the idea of warm weather all the time. Sunshine on my shoulder, makes me happy!! (channeling John Denver). I think the only thing that would hold me here is my Mommy. I don't think I could live that far away from her. And I mean, how guilty would I feel if her last child upped and moved to Florida with the other two and left her up here all by herself. How crappy would that be of me! I SUCK.

Not that we could do it right now anyway. Maybe in a couple of years. The housing market sucks and we would never be able to sell our house. Although, if they foreclose, we would! lol Plus I would have to find a good Autistic school down there. That's a big deterrent. Pulling Nick out of his school would be horrid. And trying to find another school down there as good as this one... I highly doubt it. Plus, once we go down there, there's no coming back unless we win the lottery or something.

Oh who knows. All I know is this weather sucks. My deck is a sheet of ice and John stole my car this morning. BASTARD LOLOL oh well. Kids are both home today, so I better go entertain them before they trash my house. TA

Most of us have heard this one before, but here it is with a puppet, too cute. If you haven't heard it, you're in for a real treat. John lives by this song... he knows the truth about relationships!!

Thanks for the video Mom!

Nothing new going on here. Trying to get the house in order, as usual. I've sold a bunch of stuff on ebay and made $200. I still have a ton to do, so hopefully I can make enough to pay some bills.

I'm going to put my ad in the paper about doing child care. Hopefully I'll get some takers.

Calli's sick. Arg. Nick had a cold a couple weeks ago that turned into an ear infection and that started with a cough and loss of his voice. Calli's had a cough now for a few days and it seems to be getting worse. But she's more like clearing her throat constantly rather than really coughing. She's not complaining of anything else, so we'll see.

Our pets are starting to dwindle down. LOL We lost Tommy the hamster on Christmas Eve (of all days!) and my only male guppy died over the weekend. No more baby fish for a while. Only 300 more animals to go! LOL The new dog is doing well. He's still crazy and thinks he's a little chihuahua or something the way he jumps on you, but he's cute. He and Maggie have a race to see who can get the other's collar off first. Mason usually wins. We put them out to go to the bathroom and ten minutes later, Maggie comes in collar-less. LOL Doofy dogs.

Today it's back to reality for most of us. John went back to work and Nick went off to school. He was not happy about getting up early. Even though he's been up by 6am every morning for the last week, I couldn't get him up at 6:30. Arg Back to the routine boy!

Oh, speaking of routine. We've started the kids on chores and allowance. I made up a chore chart for each of them and it's really cool. They each get a set amount of allowance and loose money from it for each chore not done. We'll see how it works out. I'm trying to convince them to save all their allowance so they can spend it when we go to Florida at the end of the year. Cross your fingers that the pull of hot wheels and barbies doesn't take over!

Off to box more stuff. TTFN

2008 New Year's Wishes

I don’t know if I can top last years, but I’ll give it a try!

The first is for me (Hey, I’m writing it, I get the first wish!) – I wish for a healthy New Year. I wish for the body that I want. I wish for peace of mind. I wish to stop worrying about what other people think of me and just be me. I wish for people to tell me the truth even if it hurts and I wish to be able to tell people what I really think without worrying if it will hurt their feelings or our friendship. I wish for more friendship, more love, and always more money. I wish that doing day care at home pays off and I’m able to stay home instead of going back to work in the corporate world. I wish for my husband to love me more. I wish for my kids to be healthy and happy. I wish for more patience to deal with both them and John. I wish for more energy and more willingness and less procrastination.

John - I wish him Health. I wish that he would see what he’s doing to himself. That he needs to take care of his blood pressure, his sleep apnea and his weight before it’s too late. I wish him Hope. Hope that his future will be better than it is now. Not necessarily perfect, but at least more comfortable. I wish him Romance. I wish that he would see that I’m doing this to my body for him as much as for me and I wish he would recognize it more and encourage me more. I want him to have a trophy wife (not that I’ll ever be that good looking). I wish him Love. I wish that he knew how much I loved him.

Nick - I wish him Calm. To be able to know when he’s loosing control and handle it. I know that’s a wish for the far future, but I hope one day it happens. I wish him Knowledge. I hope that everything he learns in school gets sucked into that brain of his and makes him smarter than we are so he can do more than we’ve done. And I wish him Fun. I wish that he is able to have Fun at least once every single day.

Calli - I wish her Health. I wish her not to have to struggle the way Nick is. I wish I could go back in time and change something I did so that neither of my children would have to face the battle this life is about to deal them. I wish her Patience. Patience to deal with a Mommy who isn’t always patient with her. I wish her Happiness in everything she does. I wish her all the jewelry, make-up and dresses her little closet can handle.

Mom – I wish you Health. I wish for all your aches and pains to go away. I wish for Youth. For you to feel as young as you are inside. I wish you Nature. For all of your surroundings to bloom and grow into the beauty of the earth. I wish you a Happy Life and Retirement.

Pop – I wish you Health as well. I wish for your diabetes to magically go away so you can have all the sweets you want! I wish for the pounds to magically go away so you can walk and run and dance the night away. I wish you Money so you and Mom can quit working and have fun in retirement.

Joanne – I wish you Health always. I wish for the MS to go away and leave you in peace. Or at least a progression so slow that it doesn’t fully hit till you’re 90 and have enjoyed your life. I wish you Peace. Peace of mind knowing that everything may not be the way you want it to be, but it is how it’s supposed to be. I wish you Grandma’s love. I wish you to be the wonderful, loving grandmother that our Grandma was to us.

Andrea – I wish you Sobriety. I wish for you to stay on this new path you are on. To stay clean and sober and to live your life like you should have done for the past 15 years. I wish you Love with your man. I wish you Peace with your kids. I wish you Joy with yourself.

John's Family - I wish you Joy. Joy in everything you do from big to small. To be happy with every meal, every conversation, every sunrise. To smile for no reason, to laugh because you smiled. To love each other every single day.

Faith & John - I wish you Happiness. I wish to see you more often. I wish for our girls to be closer. I wish for a full life for you. I’m also still wishing for a new niece or nephew. hee hee

Aunt Irene – I wish you Joy. I am so glad that we have the relationship that we do and I hope that it just gets stronger. I wish you Love. Love from your man, your kids, and your friends. I hope that your kids know what a great mother they have even when you’re being a mother. You’ve been through it all and I hope they can see that even though they may not like it, you do know what you’re talking about. I wish you Strength. Strength to be able to handle whatever else may come your way.

Laura – I love you girl! I wish you Love. Enough love to spread through that brood of yours. And so much love in return that your heart is overflowing every day. I wish you Health. I wish you Hope. I wish you Joy and I wish you lived closer to me! Thank you for coming back into my life and saving me from many a meltdown when it came to Nick.

Cassy and Casey – I wish you Everything. You are starting your lives together in a big way. I wish you Strength to deal with whatever may come. I wish you Love to pour over that precious new baby. I wish you Money to pour into that new house. I wish you Peace in your everyday. I wish you abounding Happiness for the rest of your lives. I also wish you Knowledge. Remember, you’re smarter than you think and you can do just about anything. Choose a path and follow it. It may fork, but it will only lead you to a better destination. I wish you Luck. The best of luck for everything you do.

The rest of my family - I wish you all Health, Happiness and Peace. I wish that you all enjoy your lives the way they are and strive to make them even better. I wish you all a wonderful New Year.

All my old Avis co-workers – I wish you Employment! I heard that they were outsourcing all of you and I hope that you all move on to bigger and better things. May you all get 6 figure jobs! Best of luck to all of you.

My Baby Board Girls - I wish you Love. I wish I hadn’t strayed so far away from all of you. Just remember, I think of you often and you’re always in my heart. You guys are great friends/sisters. I send all of you warm hugs and kisses!

Margaret – I wish you Success. Success in MK so great that you surpass Cindy. I wish you Love. You ooze love from every pour of your body everyday and I hope that you receive just as much back and then some. You are a wonderful person through and through and I hope you see all that you have and treasure it.

Donna – I wish you Peace. Peace from the world. I wish for them to find a cure for cancer, a cure for immune diseases, a cure for age so that you can have your family with you always. I wish you all the best in everything. Thank you for being there for me the past year. The job may not have worked out, but life is trying to find a way. I also wish you more phone calls and visits from me!

Rich & Kevin – I wish you Abundance. An abundance of everything. Love, Joy, Hope and Peace. May your love for each other grow each day. I wish you tolerance. Tolerance from others as well as from yourselves. I wish you every happiness. Thank you for being our friends even if we are a bit uncouth!

Lea & Tom – I wish you Pleasure. Pleasure taken from everything around you. Your kids, your spouse, your crazy lanky dog. I hope that we stay friends for a very long time. Thank you Lea for all your hard work. For your pressure to keep me on track. For helping me through this transformation. Without your daily push, I wouldn’t be where I am today. You get ALL the credit on this one. Thank your for being my work out buddy! Thank you for looking so damn good that it gives me motivation to look as good as you! I’m so glad our kids got put on the same team. It’s been a great few months and I hope it can be a lifetime friendship. Tom, thank you for your patience. I know dealing with the technically challenged can be hard! We promise to wait until next year to screw anything else up!

Michelle & Tim – I wish you Love. Love each other and your kids with your whole heart everyday. I wish you Real Estate. I wish for you to be able to sell your house and buy the one you’ve always dreamed of. I wish you Friendship. I wish for you to have more friends than you can handle and more joy than your heads can take. I wish you Success in business. I wish for Tim’s phone projects to sell a gazillion and for Shell’s cake business to take off. Imagine that new house with a separate commercial kitchen in it! I wish you Patience and Tolerance. Patience to deal and appreciate my kids for what they are even if they are a pain in the ass. More tolerance for them would mean more chances for us to have fun together. Thank you for being our friends. For being there for us and for caring enough to want to.

Mark, Kim, Allison, Eric and Liz – I wish you Success. Success in everything you do. Whether it be business, love, home, or life. I hope to see marriage in the future for all of you. I wish you Growth. Grow your love, grow your lives, grow you minds. I wish you Sight. See things that are around you that you may not have noticed. And try to see things in a new light. Your opinion from yesterday could be different today. I wish you Love. Love yourselves for who you are not what you think you should be.

To all of the other people I know - I wish you the joys of the holiday season. To remember the holidays are about giving, not getting. And not necessarily gifts you buy. Gifts of the heart. Gifts of Love, of Friendship, of Hope. It’s about family and friends. I wish each of you a Very Merry Christmas and a healthy, happy, prosperous New Year.

What a long week! I think Christmas is just like a wedding. You plan for months and months and it's over in one day! Kind of a let down.

The kids made out pretty good. Unfortunately, I think Nick did better than Calli. He got way more stuff to "play" with. Calli got mostly art stuff, which is what she loves, but I noticed that besides that, she really didn't get many actual toys.

I got John a zip up fleece which I really like on him and a GPS, which he is in love with! He was pissed off at first cause Mr. Genius decided to go shopping for me on Christmas Eve of all days, and unfortunately the mortgage had gone through and wiped out our account so there was no money to buy me anything. Hence, the PO'd behavior cause he got stuff and I didn't. He did get me a set up for my phone that lets you download music onto it which is really cool.

I think when it comes to the holidays, I'm more of a giver than a receiver. I love the look on people's faces when they open the gifts I gave them. I think that's way more fun. I like to try to find something they really want. I'm totally fine with getting nothing really. I have too much crap already. The only thing I would really "need" is clothes. But I wouldn't want someone to buy them since at this point my clothes are only fitting for about a month. That's just a waste. So everyone being happy on the holiday is present enough for me.

John took the kids to his parents in the afternoon and they got a ton more stuff there. Nick got an Ipod and digital camera. Calli got a barbie horse and carriage and a couple of dolls. She also got the Crayola magic paint brush thing which is totally cool! Fiber optics ROCK!

Oh, speaking of the brat! She begged me for this stupid swimming baby doll. It was like $35 which was ridiculous, but she really wanted it, so fine, I got it. We put the batteries in, started the tub put her in and boom, she swims, really cool right.. WRONG. "Mommy, how do you make her not swim? I just want to play with her". WHAT??? I could have bought a $5 doll to do that! Arg. Well, unless you take out the batteries, it can't be turned off. Plus, it's all motorized, so if you start moving her arms and legs around, it'll break. Great. That's freaking money down the drain. Hopefully she'll like it more in the summer when the baby's swimming in the pool. Freaking kids!

Their favorite gifts were of course on of the cheapest! I bought them each back packs that had tents, sleeping bags and camping stuff in them. I got them for $10! We set them up in the play room and that is where my kids have slept since Christmas. LOL

So after a two week break, I told Lea yesterday that enough was enough and we needed to get back to our workouts. I feel like crud! She should be coming over today. We're doing it here cause both the boys are off of school and we have more room to play here. Plus the brakes on the car need to be done really bad, so John said not to drive it.

We got most of the Christmas stuff down last night. Didn't have time to do everything because yesterday was Lea's kids birthday party. They're only a couple weeks apart, so they do a combined party. After the party we went back to their house to hang out. We got home around 7pm and I was just fed up with looking at the mess. So I just started pulling down boxes and taking everything apart. I know, I'm bah humbug, but I wanted my house back. The living room is all done except for the mantel. Today I'm starting on the kitchen that looks like a hurricane went through it. Then laundry, then bedrooms, then I'll tackle the play room. I probably wont get to the play room today, but it's on my list of things to do ASAP. I want to get it back to a usable state. Calli's stuff is all still in her bedroom from the summer. I'd love to get some of those storage shelves like Michelle has, but we're too broke right now. Eventually I guess. I just need to get it straightened out right now.

Ok, off to begin! Nick just unloaded the dishwasher (rock on!) so now I have to go fill it back up again (boo)

Have a day folks.

Well, it's Christmas Eve. And it's rainy and foggy out! NO!! what's up with that? If anything, it's supposed to snow, not rain. BLAH!! Mother Nature is not in the Christmas spirit.

I am though. We finished wrapping all the presents last night. Ug! I made John bring them all in from the garage and we sat there for a couple hours wrapping. Then we put them all in big garbage bags and put them out in the smoking room. That way if the kids look, they'll just think it's garbage. Hee Hee... We didn't want to have to put them back out in the garage. So now I'm going to clean up the house and start getting ready for dinner at Aunt Pat's. Then it's home to put the kiddies to bed, bring in the presents and stuff the stockings. Just call me Santa!!

I can't remember if my "wishes" post was done on Christmas or new years last year... well, either way, I'll do it for New Years cause I need more time to prepare it. Don't worry, it's coming.

Merry Christmas all! And just remember, this holiday is about giving, not receiving. It doesn't matter what you get. The best present you can get is the happy look on other people's faces when they receive your gift. I know my greedy little kids are way to young to understand that now, but I hope they learn. Hell, when I was younger, I wanted all the presents I could get. Now, ... honestly, I don't care if I don't get a single thing (well, except my Christmas PJ's. Gotta have that!!) I am way happier giving to other people. (That's probably why we're so broke!)

Ok, Happy Holidays to all of you. I love you so much! Hope Santa's Good To You!

We went to a Christmas party last night held by our friends Rich and Kevin. They have a big bash every year and it's always lots of fun. Their house is beautifully decorated. This year they had 3 trees... oh wait maybe it was 4? I couldn't keep track! The food was outstanding as always. Everything was so yummy. His chicken wings always come out better than mine. I think he left out something in the recipe!

We even got to go.... without kids!!! My little cousin Crystal came over to help me make the last of the perogi and she volunteered to stay with the kids. WOO HOO!! You ROCK CRYSTAL!!

It's always great to see Rich's family. I love them so much. They're "good people". They had a heater going outside for the smokers but it was still freaking ass cold out there! This weather is crazy! The only negative thing I had to say about the party was the PARKING!! They live on a pretty narrow street and when it's snow covered... forget it. They need to rent out all the neighbors driveways and then put out signs or something. Oh or Valet Parking!! That would be perfect! We got pretty lucky. We had a spot pretty close. Otherwise, it was a complete success. Great food, great people, great house, great hosts. Love you guys!!!

Oh another cool thing... one of the guest had a couple bags of shoes and clothes that were given to her by one of her customers. I guess it was some really rich lady. Ya know, one of those people who only wear things once or buy things and never wear them. She had all these designer shoes that were awesome, designer as in Prada designer, that kinda designer. Of course they were all freaking size 7 1/2! What's up with that shit? I did get a couple of sweaters and a Louis Vitton cell phone holder. NICE!! Plus she said she had more clothes in my size at home and she would get some for me. WOO HOO! Can't beat a Christmas party like that. You go there for the holidays and your goodie bag has SHOES IN IT!! Now that's the way to a girl's heart!

Here's a picture of me in the "SIZE 12" dress I bought for the party. Damn, I look good! Still have a ways to go, but I think that ain't bad!! Feel free to stroke my ego and tell me I look hot! Or at least luke warm! LOL

I've decided that we are technological idiots! LOL

Our friends Tom and Lea gave us a big screen tv a few weeks ago. You'd think, cool, no big deal. Tom set it all up for us and everything. Nope, we've already had to have him come over 3 times to fix it. Once was cause Calli had her feet on the front while watching something and all of a sudden the sound went all crazy (turns out she turned on the surround sound). Then he had to come because some how the picture in picture got turned on and we couldn't figure out how to turn it off. Yesterday was the best of all.

Tuesday night I wanted the kids to clean up some before they went to bed, so I turned off the tv. They cleaned up everything and off they went. I turned the tv back on and it was freaking out. It has all these different set ups. Video 1, Video 2 and so on. It kept flashing from the picture to video 1. I did figure out that if you pushed the input button it would stop, but if you pushed anything on the remote again it would start all over. Very annoying. Then of course John decides he can fix it. After that, we got no picture at all!! LOL

So he comes over last night. He said he'd never heard of that happening, and he's in the business! Only us. So he's messing with it, checking it out, then he calls me in and says, something in the room is interfering. He covers the little thingy on the front and the flashing stops. So we're trying the lights, the tree, the switches, nothing. THEN, he moves the basket that's next to the tv with all the Wii stuff in it and it stops. Turns out that when the kids cleaned up they had put the remote to the old tv in the basket and one of the Wii remotes was pressing on it sending a signal to the tv to go to video 1. ONLY WE could have something so STUPID!!! LOL I told them to never give us anything ever again cause we're too much of a pain in the ass.

I finished making most of the pirogi. I still have some cheese ones to make cause those are my favorite so I bought extra. But the Christmas eve ones are all done. YAY ME. I gave Lea and Tom a batch last night (for their trouble) LOL I can't believe Christmas is next week already. Nick comes home yesterday and says, "Mom, next Tuesday we have an early dismissal and then we have off for a couple of days." I said, "I know Honey. Next week is Christmas." His mouth dropped open. He didn't realize that's why he had off. LOL I wrapped half of the presents last night before I ran out of tape and wrapping paper. I'll run to Walmart later and get some more.

I have to take Nick to the doctor this afternoon. He's been fighting a cold for over a week now. I've still been sending him to school though. Following the rules we grew up on. "If you don't have a fever and your not throwing up, then you go to school." I always hated that rule. LOL So he's had a nasty chest cold and some congestion. Today he woke up crying and said his ear really hurt. I hate that. It's just something you can't do anything to fix. I gave him some tylenol and promised him a doctor's appointment after school. I told him to go to the nurse if it gets too bad. Poor kid. He never gets sick. Of course the one time that he does, it's dragging on forever. Hopefully some antibiotics will kick it out of him.

Ok, off to do more laundry, it's never ending!

Feeling a little better this morning. I have to get to the post office today and drop off a car payment. So I'm glad I can breath a little bit.

I forgot to mention. The guy who emailed me about the van never made contact again (should have known it was to good to be true). Someone else did come yesterday and we sold it for $1,100. Not to shabby considering all the work it needs.

I threw my freaking back out!! UG! Saturday morning I woke up at around 6am with my back killing me. Now, most of you know that I have severe lower back issues, but this is all in my upper/middle back. I stretched a lot and got back to sleep around 7am. When I woke up a couple hours later (weekend) It was still really sore, but I just dealt with it cause I had a lot of stuff to do.

Saturday night it was really bothering me so I took a percocet and went to bed. John had fallen asleep on the couch after I went up. So when I woke up at 4:30am screaming, well, not quite screaming, more like crying loud whimpers cause I couldn't get my breath, I had to make my way down to him for help. It was soooooo bad I couldn't take a breath at all. Just these little tiny inhales. With every one of those I got a horrible stabbing pain. John was trying to hold me and my back just kept spasming. He got me in a hot shower which helped a little bit and then rubbed my back for quite a while. My crying woke up poor Nick at 5am.

I think I finally went back up to bed at around 6 or so and piled all the pillows up so that I was basically sleeping sitting up. I've been pretty much layed out all day today. I called my Mommy and she told me to try ice. That worked pretty good to, along with the Aleve. But I still can't take a good breath at all. Slow and shallow is all I can muster without a stabbing pain. I'd be in bed now except, 1) the Survivor finale is on and 2) I'm afraid that I'll wake up even worse and John won't be here to help me. He's leaving for work at around 2am. I wish I had muscle relaxers. John told me to call Joanne (my sister) to yell at her for moving to FL cause she would have one on hand. lol

I just wish I could breath. UG I was gonna finish off the pirogi today, but that didn't happen. Hopefully this will go away in a day or so and I can do it.

Ok, that's my whine for the day. BLAH. Off to take some drugs and head to bed.

Here are my gorgeous kids again!

Yay! Someone emailed me and offered me $1,500 for the van! I KNOW!! I'm just as shocked as you are!! SOLD, Come and get it. I'm waiting for their call. Hopefully it'll happen soon. Then I can give the money to Lea and cut out a large chunk of what's owed. Now I just have to go clean it all out. YUCK. It's so funny, the van is TRASHED and I'm anal retentive now about the car. "Don't you dare put anything on the floor" "No toys in the car" "NO EATING in the car" It's still spotless. I'm very proud of myself.

I ran to shoprite this morning cause our power was out, I had already folded and put away all the laundry, and painted Calli's nails. LOL Anyway, I got there and they have a fake tree, 7 feet, and pre-lit for $40. Which is what we spend on a real tree. I figured this would be better since we have the puppy and because the tree's in the middle of the room this year, not tucked in a corner like normally, so it's much easier to knock over. It's a little "charlie brown-ish" but it'll do for now. Calli's begging me right now to put it up. I need to eat something first. Haven't done that yet.

Uhm, what else.... The sun finally came out. It's about freaking time! Rain is so depressing. OH!! We went to get the kids pictures taken yesterday for Christmas. My friend took them (she took the fairy pictures) We spent $20 something and got a TON of pictures. Hee Hee, it's good to know people. Now I'm just going to scan one in to do our Christmas cards. Walmart does them for 33 cents a card. WAY cheaper the the picture place. Now I just have to get the scanner to work. When I do, I'll share the pics with you.

Ok, off to eat. TTFN

Due to the disgusting idiot from my prior post, I will no longer be allowing comments to go directly through to the blog. You can leave your comment as usual, but I will have to approve it before it appears on the actual blog.

Sorry to all my normal readers for any inconvenience. One asshole spoils it for everyone. It was not something anyone else should have been subjected to. Everyone else, Please continue to comment. I always like to hear the opinions and thoughts of sane, rational people. (Don't worry all my crazy friends, you're close enough to sane to count!)

To whomever wrote the comment I deleted in the hair loss blog: I did not apreciate 1)the insinuation that I don't take care of my children. 2) That my son would ever do anything that inappropriate or 3) the bald face lie that you put in your comment about something that never did or ever would happen. If it was a joke, it was NOT FUNNY!

Please feel free to NEVER READ OR COMMENT ON MY BLOG AGAIN!

The Christmas Tree Angel

When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure.
Then Mrs Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa even more.
When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were out, Heaven knows where.
Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scattered.
Frustrated, Santa went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the elves had drank all the cider and hidden the rum. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little glass pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom.
Just then the doorbell rang, and irritated Santa marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood a little angel with a great big Christmas tree. The angel said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't this a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?'
And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.

I'm seriously sad. I'm having severe issues with my hair. I never had a lot to begin with and now it's all falling out. And I mean in CLUMPS! It's gotten so bad that I have to put it up every day otherwise I'm covered in hair. I take a shower and remove a large hamster from the drain on a daily basis. This is not good people. I wont even touch my head anymore cause I can feel how thin it is and I just start crying. I'm taking the vitamins. I'm doing the shakes. I've even started eating protein bars even though some of them are high in sugar just to try and save what's left on my head. You have no idea how hard it is to get 80 grams of protein into your system on a daily basis when your stomach is the size of an egg.

I can not walk around with no hair. I'm afraid to even look to see if I have bald spots now. I can see my scalp already. This is just horrible. HORRIBLE!! I have to go buy some hats and maybe some scarves or something. Of course it sucks that all the holidays are coming and everyone is going to see me. They'll be like, "Oh you've lost so much weight your look wond..... oh what happened to all your hair?" I am NOT OK WITH THIS!!

For my birthday, everyone can chip in and get me a hair replacement. :o(

My beautiful friend Margaret cheered me up yesterday though. She, her husband and her daughter are the most talented family on the planet. (not to mention smart and gorgeous too!) They are all musicians, artists, singers, just talent out the wazoo. Her husband Rhett and their daughter Marea made up a little Christmas Carol. She sent it to me and I'm trying to figure out how to get it on here to share with you. I'm not having much success. I'm waiting for my friend, Blythe in California to wake up. She's a genius when it comes to this stuff and she can usually figure it out for me. Wait until you hear it. It's so cute and you'll be shocked to know that Marea is only 4!! Well, 4 3/4. LOL She and Calli are only 2 months apart. I think? I think she was born when Calli was supposed to be born. End of March? Mid April? Oh I don't know. I'm horrible at that stuff. AAAA HA!! Mid April it is. Wanna know how I know? Yeah, I know you don't care, but tough shit, it's my blog, I'll type it anyway.

I know because I just looked in my drawer and pulled out her birthday invitation from last year. Why do I still have it you ask? Because like I said before, this is the most talented family on the planet and it was the coolest invitation. A picture of Marea dressed as a princess on the back of a unicorn. I'd scan it and put it on here, but I don't want to do that without permission. Some people don't want their kids pictures plastered on the internet. Even the written part inside was amazing. I love this family. Although I learned my lesson to NEVER EVER EVER sing karaoke after Margaret. Make sure you go BEFORE!!! That way when she gets up there and blows people off their seats, you can just be happy. If you go after her, no matter how good your voice is, you might as well be kermit the frog, cause all you're going to be is cute with a boring voice. LOL

Wow, I really went off on a tangent about the Pennell clan. Oh well, it was something to talk about besides my head. As soon as I figure out how to do the song, I'll let you know.

Have a day people.

Damn I'm tired! It's been a crazy few days.

Friday, Nick had a shrink appointment. The good news is that he's doing well and she's happy that I started him on all the vitamins. The bad news... that was the first time she met Calli and of course Calli threw one of her infamous tantrums. The doctor just kept looking at her and asked me a couple of questions. She then basically confirmed that Calli most likely has Asperger's too. Not a banner moment for me, but I guess I was expecting it. I held back the tears.... wow, I'm not now though. I think my mind is back to that, what did I do wrong, phase. I will forever have to realize that I fucked up my kids. Damnit. Ok, deep breath. Anyway, moving on. She said that we wont start her on any meds or even discuss any of that until after we see how she handles school. Girls are usually better than boys. We'll see.

Ok, so after that, we went to the DMV and got all the stuff taken care of for the new car then went and picked it up. YAYAY!! No more climbing over the seats. Oh and Donna... it's got a butt warmer like yours!! LOL So, anyone want a POS Van??? It runs really well. I like it.

Saturday we did a little more dog hunting. I don't know if I mentioned that before. We've been looking at shelters and stuff cause John's been asking for a "real dog". LOL Our Maggie is a tiny thing and he's used to big dogs. Nothing has been really catching his attention and the ones that were had an OUTRAGEOUS adoption fee. It's crazy. Some of them wanted up to $275. That's just insane.

Sunday... Ahhh Sunday. Sunday was a killer. Ok, so back story. Since the beginning of time, Gramma hand made the perogi for Christmas Eve dinner. Which is a large undertaking considering that the kids now have kids and there's a lot of people to feed. Our traditional Christmas Eve dinner consists of breaded and fried fish, perogi and clam chowder. Ham has been added in the last few years. Plus a few odds and ends that unfortunately, I can't remember but they aren't the main focus of dinner.

Since Gramma passed away a few years ago, we have switched to store bought perogi. Which anyone who has had that and home made knows there is NO comparison. But since my Aunt Pat does the holidays at her house and if you remember from my previous post, a Thanksgiving that feeds a small county! We can't expect her to hand make perogis too. That's just way to much for one person.

So this year I decided that I wanted the real thing and I was going to attempt to make them. HA! Ok, so I've tried before and although I can make the filling perfect, I can not make the dough. I told Mom I was going to do it and she volunteered to come and help. Silly Silly woman. LOL So I call her when I'm shopping and say, Aunt Pat says to make about 150. How many potatoes should I buy? She says, oh, 10 pounds should be good. Ok, 10 pounds. Arg! Let me tell you, 10 pounds IS MORE THAN ENOUGH!! LOL

She got here around 10 am and left around 5 pm and we still had half a pot (the huge corn pots) of potato and cheese. We did figure out the dough though!! YAY. And I have to say, I make damn good triangles. I can't say the same for Mom's though. Attention Family: Any funky looking perogis were made by Barbara! Love you Mom and thanks for all the help. We were exhausted by the end of the day. My palms are still killing me from all the rolling and I'm still not done. I figure I'll wait until the pain dies down a little bit before I finish them. We ended up making about 250 of them. HA, anyone hungry??? OH and I made the plain cheese ones this year. We haven't had them since Gramma made them. You can't buy them in a store. They're made with farmer's cheese and were always my favorite.

Today I took Nick for his first appointment with the DAN! doctor (Defeat Autism Now). She's wonderful. I really like her. She said I was doing good with the vitamins and would stick with that. She's having me do a urine test, fecal test and .... blood work (FUCK!!!) I told John we have to do it when he's home cause it takes 6-8 people to hold him down. But the test will give her a lot to work with.

We also talked about Calli and we'll do her workup at the same time as Nick's follow up to get the test results. She said, "She doesn't look healthy". I said I know! That's how she always looks, sallow, pale, dark circles under her eyes. She noticed the distended belly and I mentioned the constant vaginal issues and the begging for food which she said is most likely a yeast build up and the constant food is feeding the yeast. So maybe we'll get both these kids straightened out a little bit. We'll see.

Ok, wow, I can't believe I forgot the worst part!! Stupid me went on Craig's List to look for dogs for john and found him a few. He picked one in Newton to go see. And... CAME HOME WITH IT!! And of course, all this time we've been looking at adult dogs, fully grown, house broken, all that. What does he bring home??? A 15 week old puppy!! Arg. Ok, so he's really cute. They said he is a shepard/pit mix. They had taken a litter of pups from someone who wasn't caring for them and they were left outside all the time. They were giving them away to good homes. He's very sweet and loves Calli to death. He follows her around and lays with her on the couch. Whenever she leaves the room, he just cries. LOL The bad part, of course John works all day. So guess who is house training! ME! Although, I do have to say, Nick has been great. If I'm not in the room and the dog goes on the floor. Nick puts him outside AND CLEANS IT UP!! How awesome is that!! I'm very proud of him. So now we have the two cats, Mocha and Muffin, and our Maggie so I told John he had to have an M name. So now we have a Mason.

Like I don't have enough to do!

Well, we weren't on Rachel all that much yesterday. You did here my UG! and her look at me and say "RIGHT?" but they cut the rest out. And then the only time you saw us is the last minute we were there before she did her cooking at the end. It was a really good shot of all 4 of us though.

Still thinking about the day care thing. And Mom, I did check the laws for NJ and actually, I can take up to 5 kids (not including my own). The car situation is a concern. But you have to figure, most day cares have more kids than they can tote around. If there is an emergency (knock on wood there wouldn't be - although, with Callihan around...... hmmm) I figure, you call and ambulance, then I call a friend to stay with the kids. I also figure, that if I do this, we'll make twice as much money as when I was at work. We could pay off our debt and then maybe save up for another van. After the holidays, I'm going to put a couple adds out there and see what I get.

As for MK, I know it's there waiting for me, but I can't wrap my head around that like you can. I can't see asking people to spend money on that when right now most people can't pay their bills. I'm sure I'll always be a MK lady, but not right now. I love you though!! Call me, we'll have a play date!

I've got a bunch of lots of clothes on Ebay right now. All size 18 if anyone is interested. Laura, no worries, you have your own pile! I still have so much more to do. I hate putting things on ebay, it's such a pain in the ass, but I like the money!!

Ok, off to shower. I have a ton of running to do today. Work out, gymnastics, pick up car paperwork, DMV, dress drop off for Shelly, home, and then car swap. Crap, I just thought of something really important that I had to do and then it went POOF! OH NO! I hate when that happens. (like daily!) Uhm,.... uh.... Oh I don't know. I hope I think of it. TTFN

Morning Folks.

Weight Check - 190!! Looks like I'm doing about 5 pounds a week. If that holds, I should be at my goal weight by my birthday (Feb. 7th). Happy Birthday to me!! I'm hoping to surpass my goal by about 15 pounds since there is a little bit of a gain back. I want that leeway.

Tomorrow I'm going to pick up my new car. THANK GOD!! We're buying it from Tim's sister. John's Dad checked it all out and gave us a green light. And thankfully they are happy to take payments. No more climbing over the seats or worrying that the wheels are going to fall off on the highway! Woo Hoo!!

We'll be on Rachel Ray Today!!

I know, I'm the worst blogger ever. Sorry.

Let's see. Thanksgiving went really well. Dinner at my Aunt's as usual. It was a smaller crowd this year. Only around 35 people. LOL It was all yummy of course, but I was very sad and depressed because I only got down about 4 bites before I was full and couldn't eat anymore. I swear I was gonna cry sitting at the table watching everyone stuff their faces and I couldn't. So depressing. I did take home a big plate of food that I've been munching on.

Friday, I was one of those insane people who got up at the crack of dawn and went shopping. I got almost everything I needed and the kids are done except for one thing for Calli. I didn't go overboard either, so I'm pretty proud of myself. The only thing I got that wasn't on sale was this stupid doll that Calli wanted that actually swims in water. Damn thing was like $35! UG. Oh well. It was on the top of her list.

My biggest fear was that I didn't get enough for Nick. Calli is so easy to buy for that I always seem to get more for her than for him. But once I unloaded everything, it was pretty even. He may have even had a little bit more.

We're going to get the car checked out tonight. Hopefully all is well with it and we can buy it. It's our friend Tim's sister's car. I can't wait to be able to get into the car from the driver's side (and out too!) That will be so nice. Driving around this weekend, I swear half the time we thought the front wheel was just gonna fall right off. Scary.

OH, I gave myself a little holiday present. I paid off our Walmart cards. They'd been in collections forever and I used to get calls from them at least (no joke) 15 times a day. Drove me insane. They sent us settlement letters and I was able to pay them off at 30% what we owed. Totally worth it. YAY ME!

So I'm thinking that I don't want to go back to work, no surprise there. Of course John HATES that idea. I was thinking of seeing if I could get some kids here and do daycare in the house. I believe that as long as you have no more than 5 kids that you don't need a licence. 5 kids X $200 a week.... that's more than I was making in the corporate world. Although, I don't know if I would take 5! LOL We'll see. I'll put an add on Craig's List and see what happens.

Today is a laundry and ebay day, so I need to get to it. TTFN

OH WAIT... Mark your calendars. This Wednesday!! We will again be on the Rachel Ray show. And when she shows the wreath and they say how much it is, I'm the one who makes the weird noise that she talks too! Hee Hee!!

Nick had a very nice birthday. He got lots of cool things and had fun with all his friends. The new Hess Truck Rocks by the way. Very cool this year!

It's been rainy and cold here for what seems like weeks. It's so dreary. I miss the sun. I've been reading the Twilight books which are based in the Seatle, Washington area and it's always raining in them. I swear, I think I'm projecting the books into real life. I just have a feeling that a gorgeous vampire is going to knock on my door any minute. LOL (Going to see the movie tonight!)

Weight check... 195! Woo Hoo 45 more pounds to go! I think I'll be really close by my birthday. YAY!! I'm now down 62 pounds.

I was thinking that now that Nick's birthday is done we can get back to some sence of normalcy. Nope. We have Brittnee's birthday party this weekend, Thanksgiving, Daniel and Sara's birthday's next month, not to mention that Christmas is quickly aproaching! Arg. I really need to get selling on Ebay so I can afford Christmas. It seems that as they get older, the presents get more expensive. They don't want the $2 doll or car anymore. They want the $50 talking Panda and the $80 Lego set. I really need to win the lottery. Every year we are broke around this time, but I always seem to manage. I think we'll be fine. Ebay will definetly help a lot. I just have to get my butt going and get stuff on there. I have PLENTY! Soooooo many clothes.

Our family of Eagles haven't been around a lot lately. The neighbor was over yesterday and said he saw them, so they must be hanging out further down the lake right now. Turns out it's a breading pair with 4 babies. Very cool.

Ok, off to warm up the house. Gotta get the fire going again (not easy with all the wet wood!)

I know my blogs are now few and far between, but boy, I just don't have a lot of time these days. Between baking, cleaning, laundry, cooking, gymnastics, workouts, and shopping for birthdays... I'm booked and beat. I just made two dozen cupcakes that are now cooling before I have to icing them. Those are for Nick's school tomorrow. Then tomorrow I have to make his cake for Saturday. Shelly let me borrow her giant cupcake pan and even though Nick was really upset that Shell couldn't make his truck cake, he got over it pretty quick when I showed him the cupcake cake. He thought that was pretty cool.

Going shopping for his birthday with Callihan in tow was a nightmare. She just kept saying, I want that, I want that. "It's not YOUR birthday!" I kept saying. We ended up getting Nick two Wii games (both on sale WOO HOO!) A Hot Wheels racing one and the Lego's Star Wars one. We got him the Wall-E movie, a construction trucks set (found in the cheapy section) and this zero gravity car that he was begging for. The thing drives on the walls and ceiling. Should be interesting.

If anyone else is looking for stuff for him:

Anything Lego's as long as they are the small ones. Plain Lego's are fine, but if you are going to buy the sets, stick to things that are cars or trucks. He's not really interested in the ships, space ships, air plane type things.

Any sets for his Geo Tracks train.

Games for the Wii or the Gameboy (not the DS!) - Non-Violent Only Please

Cars and trucks are always a winner for him.

Size 8/10 clothes

Moon Sand

That should be good for now. Christmas lists to come. Oh boy! Why couldn't I have summer babies???

Oh, Lea is taking me to the movies on Tuesday to see Twilight. That's the new movie out made from the book I just read that Cassy got me addicted to while she was here. I read the damn thing in 3 days. (500 some odd pages). She said she mailed me the next one, but I haven't gotten it yet. I have a feeling she sent it to the wrong town. Arg.

Ok, off to do another load of laundry and put icing on the cupcakes.

Party is around 1-2 pm on Saturday. Oh, let's say 1:30 and make it even. Please remember that we are also celebrating John's birthday which is tomorrow. No gift is required, but if you'd like to get him something, stuff for the fish tank would be good. Plants, little houses or even fish would be great. But a card and a hug is all he really needs. hee hee hee (when it's my birthday... I want PRESENTS DAMNIT!!) I'm greedy, what can I say.

What a crazy week.

Cassy and Casey were great. We loved having them here. We did the city, Aunt Pat's, Rockaway, and Mom's. It seems like we were running every day and the week went by too quick. It was really hard letting them go. Cassy looks great. You can barely tell she's pregnant. She's definitely FEELING pregnant though. Poor thing. She gonna be one of those chicks that we all hate who only gets a big belly and from behind you can't even tell she's pg. LOL

They've really got it all together. They have a 5 year plan and it's a damn good plan. I think they're going to be fine. I can't wait to see the baby. Two gorgeous parents can only lead to gorgeous kids.

Casey was such a big help too. Every minute he was like, what can I help you do? He loaded wood, cleaned the kitchen, pulled carpet. He ROCKS! Good choice Cass.

Saturday's party was a big success. We had a really good showing and everyone seemed to have a lot of fun. Not to mention that I got $170 in FREE STUFF! Woo Hoo. I even got some outfits in a medium. (Thinking ahead) And I replaced my Butterfly that so sadly melted. (Don't ask - we just found it that way one day) I cooked up a storm and everyone was happily stuffed by the end of the night. The last people left at about 2:30am. It was a lot of fun.

The doctor's office called me today. The nurse said that my blood work came back and it wasn't good. I had a B 12 deficiency before, but she said now it was extreme and I had to get to my primary ASAP to get a round of injections started. yeah Arg I have an appointment tomorrow morning to start. You don't realize the damage the lack of one little vitamin can do. Apparently it can cause permanent neurological damage, memory loss (yeah must have been deficient for a while!) numbness, tingling in the extremities, dizziness, fatigue and a plethora of other things. Just lovely. Hopefully after I get it leveled I'll start feeling better. We'll see.

So, did anyone see me on Rachel Ray today????? I did! WOO HOOO!! The next time we'll be on is between the 3rd and the 5th of december. I'll let you know.

Don't forget this Saturday is Nick's birthday. All are welcome. Probably start around 1 pm. Legos, cars, Wii games, gameboy games (no violent games please!) are all on his list.

Off to make dinner for these heathens!

Wednesday Weight Check: 199 BABY!!! I have crossed over the 200 mark with hopes of never ever returning!

Cassy is in town for a few days. (My niece) She looks great (as always). Even being 4 months pregnant - SURPRISE!!! We've been keeping it on the DL for a while. But yup. We will have a new member of our family come May. I'm going to be a .... UG.... Great Aunt. Although, I know I'm wonderful and all, but .... how about Rockin Aunt, or Awesome Aunt... Great Aunt just seems old. Hee Hee Hee,... Mom is going to be a GREAT GRANDMOTHER! Ha, talk about feeling old. LOL I'm very proud of Cass. She's just got it all together. Her and Casey (her man) have the next 3 years completely figured out already. I'm so proud of her. She's always been a smart cookie and when they hit this little speed bump, the just kept going. I see a very bright future.

We've had a very busy week that's why I haven't written. We picked them up in New York and then gave Casey a little tour since he'd never been there. He was quite awe struck. It was so cute. He took so many pictures. Cassey told him, and I quote "If you take one more picture of me, I'm going to shove that camera up your ass!" HA LOL Cassey is long past the awe of NY. LOL We had fun though.

Monday was blood work for me and a little running around. Tuesday was visiting day. We saw Aunt Pat and the gang. Drove though the famous Rockaway so Casey could get the full affect. (It was a very short ride LOL) I stopped and got a carpet for the living room. Threw my workout in there somewhere too.

Today we're going up to Mom's for the day. Busy Busy Busy!!

Ok, off to get dressed. Have a great day folks!

I went out and bought one of those automatic scoop litter boxes in hopes that it will stay clean and keep the cats from peeing on the carpet. I also convinced John to rip up all the living room carpet. It was a plan we've had for a while, but he had wanted to wait until we could afford new flooring. I told him at this point, we might as well just rip it up and get a remnant carpet for the middle and the rest will be covered by the furniture. This way, we get rid of all the pee and if they do it again, it will be easier to clean. Cross your fingers folks!

So, yesterday we went to Rachel Ray. SO MUCH FUN. Ok, so getting up at 4:30am to go to the city and then waiting 3 1/2 hours to get into the studio wasn't all that fun, but the show was! They segments for two different shows. The first will air on November 17th and its the next elimination round for the "Hey, Can you cook?" contest she does. (I know who the final two are!!) The other segment will air between December 3-5. They weren't sure which date but it will have Miranda Cosgrove (iCarly) and some holiday stuff.

We got snack of the day (yummy brownies), December's issue of Every Day with Rachel Ray magazine and the 1st season DVD of iCarly (which my kids were THRILLED about) - confession, I love iCarly. I find myself watching it all the time and the kids aren't even in the room! It's really cute. After the taping, we ran out of there, grab a quick bite (since we hadn't eaten anything but a mini bagel and a bite of brownie since 4:30 am!) and the rushed to catch the next train home. We had to do that because we had to be back home by 6:30 for Nick football banquet.

The banquet was really cute. All the kids got a nice trophy and we all had dinner (food wasn't so hot) We finally got out of there about 8:30, got the kids home and put them straight to bed. Calli had fallen asleep at the banquet because both kids were up at 5:30 that morning and she hadn't napped. All in all it was a very long day, but fun.

This morning I woke up, looked at the clock that read 5:45am and then saw John lying in bed. I woke him up and said, what time are you supposed to go to work. He looked at the clock, said FUCK, and jumped out of bed. Some how the clock had changed to Saturday, so even though it was set, it didn't go off cause it's one of those smart clocks that will only go off on the weekdays if you want it to. Needless to say, everyone in the house got woken up. So again, my kids have been up since the crack of dawn. Calli is DEFINITELY taking a nap today! She can do that, I'll clean this disaster and get ready for carpet removal.

So, it's bad now, but it will be bright and shiney and smell pretty for the party. I promise!

Would anyone like a cat?

We ADORE our cats. But they have to go. They've started peeing all over the house and we can't get them to stop. The kids are going to be devasted, but there's nothing else we can do. They need to go to seperate houses. Mom said if they are the only cat, that may help. One is orange and white and the other is black. There are pics of them on the blog somewhere. It's going to kill me to let them go, but it's just not healthy for the kids to be around the urine, plus, it's making my house stink to high heaven. I'm going to call the place where I got them, but thought I would offer them up to you guys first. I want them to go to a good home cause they are so sweet. Maybe someone who has a lot of property so they can be outside? Anyone Anyone?

Here are the pictures you've all been waiting for! Well, my ass is definitely smaller!

I ran to the store today to buy a shirt to wear tomorrow. I went to fashion bug. I actually had to shop in the normal section, not the plus side of the store! How cool is that?! I bought a size 12 top! (stretchy though)

So, without further ado......

Oh wait, one ado... I made sure to not suck in in either of these pictures so I knew how I actually looked. I still have a LOT of work to do, but it'll come.

So, without further ado again...

I got my camera to work!! Yay here are some pics. They are out of order cause it wouldn't let me upload them all at once. They are the kids playing in the snow, carving pumpkins and halloween. The scary lady with Calli is my Mom. She's such a dork. Gotta love her. I'm going to have John take some after pictures now and I'll do some comparisons for you.

2 Beautiful Things

Sorry I haven't written in a while. Busy Busy. Halloween went well considering we were walking around with 7 kids!! They all gave out around 7pm which is really early for us, but they were done. We went to the diner to eat and then back to Shell's for game night. We had a good time.

We FINALLY got wood delivered yesterday. After the first company not showing up.... TWICE, we got someone else to do it and they showed up the same day. Then Nick's football coach called one of his friends and he dropped some off too. We had 3 1/2 cords dumped next to the house. I immediately went over to the boys next door and their friends and said, Hey, wanna earn a couple bucks? Hee Hee. So we had them stacking all the wood. It was a double workout yesterday for me. I did my morning one with Lea, then I helped them unload the wood from the truck and helped the boys stack it. My back was killing me by the end of the night.

On to my 2 beautiful things.

The first... While stacking the wood yesterday, we saw a bald eagle fly across the sky and land in one of our trees. It was the most beautiful site. We then noticed that there was a female further back in the woods. I have never seen a bald eagle in the wild. I was in awe and close to tears. I ran and got my camera and took a couple shots but my USB cord isn't working for it and I can't download the pictures. ARG. They weren't really all that good though because of the position he was in. As I sit here typing this, I am watching him actually flying over the lake. The site of something like that... something that almost didn't exist anymore, is awe inspiring. He is just gorgeous with his big white head and wings that seem to stretch to heaven. We think they may have a nest up in the woods behind our house. How wonderful would that be?

The second beautiful thing... PRESIDENT Barak Obama. Now I know some of you are probably staunch McCain supporters and that is your right. But think about it. You have just witnessed history in the making. You saw, with your own eyes, prejudice be put aside. You heard, with your own ears, ideas of change. We may disagree about who's ideas are the right ones, but you can not disagree with the knowledge that his being elected is change in itself. Considering that 50 years ago, a black man couldn't even drink from the same water fountain as a white man. Black children couldn't play in the same playgrounds, or swim in the same pools as white children. Where black women were expected to be nothing more than maids. This election says a lot about how much our country has changed in the last 50 years, and I pray that it continues.

Personally I was for Obama all along. Last night I found out that John was a McCain fan. BUT, I believe that is because he never actually listened to both sides and heard what each one was planning to do. He only listened to what his MOTHER had to say. And we all know what that means. He actually gave me some bullshit last night about him not being able to be president because they can't prove he was born in the US!! What freaking stupidity is that... oh yeah. Been talking to Mom again. Then he's bitching about the united health care plan that he's planning. Ok, now, I can't say too much on this because I don't know all the facts. What I do know is that what he's planning is the same sort of plan that 1/2 the other countries of the world have and they all seem to be doing great. My friends who live in Canada have way better health care then we have and they have the plan he is proposing. I think it just pissed me off that he would just take everything she told him as gospel and not actually look at the facts and think for himself. If he had and still wanted McCain, I'd be fine with that, but not spouting this stupid crap. He also said Oh, I guess you want our taxes raised... HA, really? Are you making another $180,000 that I don't know about? He's gonna tax the rich people who have more than enough to go around. Not us poor folk.

It's just a beautiful day. And tomorrow... TOMORROW will be a GORGEOUS DAY!! Because TOMORROW, We will see RACHEL RAY!!! WOOO HOOOOOOOO!!!!!

So that little dusting on my car turned into about 4-5 inches throughout the day. It became total mayhem around here since no one was prepared for SNOW IN OCTOBER!!

Mom ended up staying here because most of the roads were closed and she couldn't get home. And then there was poor Nick...

My poor poor baby! The bus driver called me at 2pm and said, just wanted to let you know that roads are a mess and we are definitely going to be late. Ok, no problem. Then she calls me 1/2 hour later (when kids are normally picked up) and says, I can't get out of Hackettstown. WHAT?? After multiple calls back and forth trying to find a way out, she finally finds a cop that tells her she's not going anywhere. She asks me if I can go get them. Uhm, first of all, that's not my job, second, I'll have to wait for John to get home because I'm not driving in this with my daughter in the car and third, the school is only going to let me take MY kid, they wont release the other 3 to me. I told her to call her boss. She did and he said he would go pick them up (which should have been decided on an hour before). He finally picked up the kids at 4pm. My poor baby didn't get home until 6:30 last night. I gave him a pass on homework and let him go play in the snow. Considering he had been gone for going on 12 hours, I figured he'd need the reprieve.

Calli thought it was great. She got to play in the snow. She got to play with Grandma, which included doing her hair, brushing, clipping, putting in green spray. And she got to have hot chocolate. It was a fun filled evening for her.

We lost power and cable multiple times, but all was well. We are no worse for the wear. I'll upload some picks when I can.

HA, Calli just heard the weather report and she yelled to me... MOM, two more days of sunny and then it's HALLOWEEN!!

Ok, I'm off to call for firewood. We're running dangerously low.

This is what I woke up to this morning!! WTF!! It's OCTOBER!! There's no SNOW in October!! I actually had to go out and shovel the porch so Nick didn't fall on his butt. It's too early for snow. I'm sad! The kids on the other hand were jumping up and down screaming! YAY SNOW!! SANTA'S COMING! HA LOL Remember when we were that age and loved the snow? That's before we had to shovel it and drive in it. Arg. Mom called this morning to tell me that she had 3 inches already and they were calling for a couple more. There were a ton of trees down and all the power was out. They are running on a generator. The ground isn't frozen yet so the weight of all the snow uprooted the trees. HA, that's what you get for moving out to the sticks!! Love you Mom.

So, funny story. It seems I need to get my perfect vision checked. Every morning I weigh myself (I know you're not supposed to!). Right before I get in the shower, when I'm all naked (no added weight please!) I jump on the scale to see what it says. Today I got on the scale as normal and looked and thought ok, 213, that's fine. And got off. Then went... UHM, WAIT A MINUTE!! Looked at the scale again, got back on... realized I've been reading the damn thing wrong. It didnt say 213... it said 205!!! I was miss reading the marks. (Need a digital one!) That's right friends. I am now down 52 POUNDS in 2 1/2 months!!! I haven't been this weight in eight years, since I had Nick. One more pound and I'll beat that record. And then I wont have been that weight in .... uhm.... in about 19 years... holy crap. I went into high school at 225.

Definetly keeps you motivated! WOO HOO Bring on the skinny jeans!

Off to do preschool with Calli. I'm making her do some book work so she doesn't fall behind.

Cassy will be here in 12 days! YAY

Here are a few pictures I've taken recently of my lake in the early morning just before sunrise and of our mountain. The leaves are just gorgeous. Enjoy!

And the last one is of my gorgeous kids! How great is that picture??!!!

We've got a great group for the party this year. It's gonna be a blast. Don't miss out!

I just started using Picasa... I know, I know, I'm slow on the uptake. But it was soooo cool. It found ALL the pictures on my computer. So I thought I'd show off my pictures. This is my yearly pick of the kids. I started with the first one (top left) when Calli was 1 1/2 and Nick was almost 5. The last (bottom right) is my newest addition. Calli will be 5 in February and Nick will be 8 next month. They grow so fast, but they better get used to these picks cause I'll be taking them until their 90 or I'm dead!

Clutzy Week

Wednesday, Calli and I went to the mall. We stopped at Sears so I could look at those exercise ball things. She was climbing on one of the bikes and I promptly told her to get down. I turn around and a few seconds later I turn back and said, Callihan, come here... to watch her immediately fall off one of the treadmills and bash her face into the side of it. Sears employees came SWARMING out of the wood works. "Is she ok? We'll get ice" (please don't sue!) HA. She scratched her nose and forehead and they were swollen, but besides that, she was fine.

We come home and get Nick ready for football. I made Calli stay home with me that night cause it was too cold. John and Nick walk out the door and walk back in about 30 seconds later with Nick crying. I'm like, what the hell did John yell at him for, they just walked out? Then John says, Go in the kitchen buddy. Hmm, ok. He comes to me and I see blood coming out his nose! OMG What the hell happened?? Turns out he missed the last step and went face first into the van. His nose was swelling. After some icing, we checked it out and figured it wasn't broken, but probably close to it. He said, I think I can still play football. Awwwww.

Yesterday, Lea watched Calli for me while I went to another BORING unemployment seminar thing they make you go to. When I got back to her house, no one was answering the door so I walked around back to see if the tv was on. As I was coming back to the front, my foot slipped off the brick path, into the ditch beside it and completely twisted. OMG, I was standing in her back yard SCREAMING as she was calling my cell to tell me they were at McDonald's. So I hobbled back to my car and drove home to sit on the couch with my Boo Boo Clifford and wait for them. It's the same ankle that I've torn the ligaments in twice and the one I broke at shoprite. It's just not having a good life. Today, I have a pretty bad limp and if I step wrong, I'm screaming. Needless to say, workout are on hold. I did end up getting the exercise ball though, so I'll do some crunches today.... maybe.

Let's see, I haven't heard from Jessy, Lisa, Margaret, Aunt Irene, Jackie, Wilson, Valerie and a few others. Come to the party, it'll be fun!! Hell, Nick's teacher is even coming!!

Off to ice my ankle. Later gators!

OMG OMG OMG!!!

I got tickets to the Rachel Ray Show!!! I'm soooooo excited! I had put in for them like 6 months ago. At the time Shelly said, yeah, I keep putting in for them but never get picked. Friday I got an email that said "Tickets available" YAYAYAY. Of course I called Shell right away. So it will be me, Shell, Tim and either John or Lea. The only bad side is that they are not a guarantee. They offer more tickets then seats, so it's first come first serve. We are going November 6th for the 10:15 shooting. Shell was here last night and we looked over the train schedule. If we catch the 7:30 train, we can be there by 9am, catch a cab (subway was way to confusing) and be there by 9:10. That gives us a little over an hour of leeway. Hopefully that's enough. I'M SOOOO EXCITED!! I love Rachel. Her man hands annoy me and her obsessive love of her dog is a little out of control, but hey, she'll feed me!!

Weight check.. I am now 214 down a total of 43 pounds. 7 pounds to 50 and 15 pounds until I break into the 100's!! So even though I HATE working out every day... I guess it's working. YUCK not to mention the fact that I haven't been keeping my food down lately. I need to start eating slower. I'm still eating very little, but I eat so fast that my tummy gets pissed and sends it back up. I'll figure it out sooner or later.

YAY, I have party goers!! Anyone else??? Jessy? Lisa? Valerie??

Off to do more laundry.

Hey People, Seriously need to know if anyone is coming to the party... Anyone Anyone?

We had a miracle on Saturday. Nick's team actually WON A GAME!!! We played against Jefferson (who had lost all their games as well). I was watching Nick and realized that when he was on defence he would get down, then get up and stand there with his hands up just waiting for the guys to come at him. I pulled him aside and said, don't wait Bud. As soon as that ball moves you plow right in between the guys in front of you and hit the dude with the ball. A few plays later (and me yelling from the side lines to remind him every play), that's exactly what he did and he PUMMELLED the quarterback. WOO HOOOO GO NICK!! He was so proud of himself. He ended up with two sacks this game.

I think the parents were more excited than the kids. We were all standing on the side lines just screaming!! LOL They did good and at least they can say they won one game.

I made John help me clean today. I'm sick of this disastrous house. I'm really trying to go through room by room and clear out. It took me about 2 hours to do the computer desk on Friday. Arg. I spent most of today in the bathroom. There was shit in the cabinets that expired in 2002. Yeah, I'd say that's not good anymore. LOL Stuff just gets pushed to the back and you forget about it. Now it's all nice and neat in there. ... ... ... for now. I figure if we focus on one or two rooms every Sunday, by the time the party rolls around, we'll be in good shape. (if anyone comes... damn, I need more friends - or at least less busy ones)

Update on the van. Most of you know that in MAY!! my driver's side door jammed shut and has been stuck that way ever since. We've had multiple people try to get it open and it's a no go. Friday we went over to Donna's and her son took a turn. We ended up ripping off the inside panel to get at the part and it still wont budge. It's just not worth it anymore. I told John we should see what we could get for it as a trade in and buy a used car. (Unless anyone has a car they don't want anymore that runs and all the doors open??) LOL It has to be inspected in a couple of months and it's going to fail. Might as well get something else now, or at least start looking.

OH, I forgot. I went for my interview and from what it sounds I'm exactly what they are looking for and have all the qualifications. They said they would let me know in a few weeks. If I get this job it will be a cake walk! It's basically what I did as an Admin for Cendant for a department of 60 people and 500 entities except this company is 3 people and 5 entities!! Rock on! Plus they are really easy on hours and such. They're like, "We don't take a head count here. You come in when you come in and your leave when you leave. As long as your work is done, we don't care." NO MORE FACE TIME!!!! Gotta love it. I was soooo not interested in going on this interview, now I'm glad I did. We'll see what happens.

Going to veg out before dinner. Don't forget to let me know that you are coming. Stroke my ego folks, it's freaking depressing.

Mark Your Calendars!!

The Annual Toy and Lingerie party will be held on November 15th at 8 pm. Feel free to come early and get your drink on. We all know it's way more fun when you're not so inhibited!! I figure everyone should come around 7pm, eat drink and find a seat. Please either email me at flutterbyheaven@gmail or add a comment to the blog to let me know if you can make it. I need to know how much food and drinks to buy.

I've now been working out for an hour a day 5 days a week. This morning I added 45 minutes of Yoga (which is really freaking hard by the way). I started doing it and when Calli woke up, she joined me. I was really jealous of how flexible she is. All the poses were like nothing to her. I struggled with every breath. Damn kids! Needless to say, after all this working out, everything prettu much hurts. My shoulder, my back, my arms, my legs, hell, sometimes my hair hurts!! But I keep telling myself it's all worth it.

I went to Lane Bryant yesterday to get an outfit for my interview tomorrow (since my suit doesn't fit anymore) and almost everything I tried on was in a 14. I was shocked. I love that store but one more size and I wont be able to shop there anymore. So Sad! :o(

Nick's school is doing Book It! which is a program they run with Pizza Hut. The kids have to read for 15 min a night and at the end of the month they get a personal pan pizza for free. HA, the kid is so excited about that. It cracks me up. But hey, if it gets him to reading I'm all for it. He's sitting her next to me reading now. Oops, should I be listening???

I'm so excited about the party. This is the only party I ever have (adult wise), so I enjoy it. I hope lots of you can come. I'm giving you a months notice people!! The first one of these I had, the place was packed!! It's dwindled down to only a few now. It's more fun when it's lots of people (not that my regulars aren't fun!!) but you know what I mean. And don't forget, it's co-ed so all the guys can come too!! I don't care if you're prude or not, close your eyes when the toys come out and just look at the jammies, eat the food and hang out.

Oh, Nick's birthday is the following Saturday, November 22. We'll be having a party here for him with a very special "Cake by Michelle" WOO HOO So mark that day on your calendar too. I can't believe my baby is going to be EIGHT! I feel so old. Jeeze, I remember when he was 2 and thinking that 10 seemed so far away. Now it's right around the corner! WWAAAAHHhhhhh

Ok, dinner is begging to be made. TTFN - don't forget to let me know if you can come. Let me know if you can't come too so I can talk you into it!!

Happy Thanksgiving!

To all my Canadian friends that is! Hee Hee

So, I'm supposed to do some call today in about 20 minutes for a job at Cadbury (yup, the candy people). The only problem is it's in the tax department. Arg. I don't really want to do that again. Tax is a pain in the ass. Everyone is stressed ALL THE TIME and they work insane hours. I don't want to say straight off, No, I wont work overtime, but she has to be aware that during busy season (which for tax is like, 9 months out of the year) I can't stay till 8pm. We'll see what happens. Hey, if they offer me a crap load of money, I can't really say no I guess. Not that I want to go back to work at all.

It's crazy being home. There's ALWAYS something to do. Whether it be cleaning, cooking, laundry, baths, shopping, bills, kids, it's just never ending. I don't know how I ever got anything done working full time. I don't want to give this up, but I know unemployment will only last so long. Bah Humbug. Why can't unemployment just pay me forever? Or why can't they offer to double John's salary? I shouldn't bitch though, considering they layed off a couple people at his work last week. I should just be happy he has a job.

We were standing around football practice the other night with a bunch of other parents and John was the only one in the group with a job.. (SHOCKER, I KNOW!!!) They were all talking about how their companies were just laying people off left and right. It's a scary time. I'm just picturing us turning into the poor from the great depression and everyone standing on line for a loaf of bread and a hunk of cheese that needs to last us for a week. HA Talk about a diet! I'm sure it will turn around sooner or later.

Ok, this lady is gonna call soon. Gotta go bond and gag the kids.

Nick's team lost again yesterday... no big surprise. But Nick played a lot more than usual. I guess giving the coach a what for and then plopping our chairs right behind the bench so the coaches had to look at us really does something. Hee Hee Hee. They did really well and they always try their best. That's what counts, even if they suck! lol

My cousin Valerie stopped by today to bring me some clothes. I pulled out a pair of size 14 jeans and told her they would have to be put away for a while. She said no no, try them on. Now keep in mind that they were stretch jeans, but.... They fit! Well, no, they didn't extactly fit. They were really really tight, BUT, I got them BUTTONED!! I haven't been in a 14 since... uhm.. well, I don't actually ever remember being in a 14, but I had to have been at some point right? Probably 6th grade? I can't wait till they really fit and I don't get that sausage roll over the top of them. And then I can't wait till they're too big! Sooner or later I guess.

John cleaned out the garage today and moved all my boxes of crap from the back to the front so that I now have no excuse for not going through them and getting rid of everything. I have to do a lot this week because the mondo garage sale is this weekend. For those of you that live in Jersey, BARKS Garage sale is this weekend at Wild West City. This thing is awesome. It's huge and you walk around, grab a ton of stuff and they look at it and say, Uhm, $5 for everything. Sunday afternoon they have $1 bag sales. You pay a $1 for the bag and fill it with as much as you can. I've gotten some really good stuff there including Bovarian china that completed my grandmother's set. Check it out if you're in the area. If you're not, it's worth the trip!

That's it for now, gotta tuck the kids in.

I am putting in a Mary Kay order. If anyone needs anything, please let me know by Monday! Check out the site. They have a TON of new stuff. All new colors and compacts, and don't forget about all the skin care, holiday gifts, etc. And you know you all get discounts! www.marykay.com
Because I haven't been doing it a lot, my web site lapsed. So just go onto the main site and then email me with what you want. Don't order on the site! flutterbyheaven@gmail.com

Monday night will be the deadline.

Congratulations to Beth and Mike!! A new house is so much fun and it's good to know that someone is buying and selling in this market! Dang, you should've bought the house down the street from us. It's GORGEOUS, huge and going cheap! But I'm still happy for you. You're really close to me now. Poor Mike, he's gonna have to see me more. hee heee heeeee.

Party Time!!! I talked to my chicky who does the shows. We still have to nail down a date. The 14th is no good for some, so it will either be the 7th, 8th or the 15th. I'm trying to shoot for the 15th. Mark your calendars folks. Pencil it in all the dates! I'm hoping for a bigger group this year. Come one come all! Lots of new stuff to see. And I'm much skinnier now, so I can try on some of the clothes without looking like a sausage! Woo Hoo

I was a gymnastics yesterday and saw my reflection in the glass... it was very bizarre. You know how you picture yourself in your mind is never what you really look like. I'm used to having a thin picture in my mind and then seeing a reflection of the michelan man. Yesterday, what I saw was much smaller. I must have looked like an idiot standing infront of the window turning this way and that. HA LOL

I kept Nicky home from school today. Poor kid could not get to sleep last night. We tried everything. Normally he's a good sleeper and is out within 5 minutes of his head hitting the pillow. Last night he was up till after Midnight!! And do you know he was still up before the bus came. (I left a message for her but I guess she didn't get it) I'm glad I kept him home though cause he's really congested. He's coming down with something. Might as well head it off at the pass. That's probably why he couldn't sleep.

Off to do laundry.... YAY! :o( It's never ending!!

Steak is not my friend. It's soooo yummy, but I guess I don't chew it well enough or eat too much, but damn. It wasn't even a stomach ache. It was just pure pain, like it was stuck (which it probably was). The puking lasted a while and I felt like I pulled all the muscles in my chest. Then I get up this morning and I can barely move my legs from yesterdays workout. I don't think working out today would be a good idea. I think it might cause more damage than good. I'm sure Lea will talk me into it, but I'd have to do all upper body, and that all hurts too. I don't want to do something major. Knowing my luck, I'd tear a muscle or something and then not be able to do anything for weeks. I think I'll lay low today and stick to laundry. Cross your fingers that Lea agrees.

TV TALK

I have become addicted to the Duggar family. You know them, the ones with the 17 children and one on the way. They live in a HUGE beautiful house in AR that they built BY HAND themselves. Anyway, they have a new weekly show on. Last night, their oldest son Joshua, now 20, called some chicks parents and asked to "formaly court his daughter". Ok, now in our world, that's cute and that would mean dating... not in the Dugger world. In the Dugger world, it means he PROPOSES to the girl and they get to know each other during their engagement. Not only is that bizarre, but they are only allowed to hold hands. There is no intimate contact allowed at all, including kissing, until the wedding day. Hmm okkkkkk. They have to have a chaperone with them at all times. Now, if this was me, I'd run away from home. Not only are they ok with all of this, but ALL 17 of the Dugger kids are on the same page. "Oh no, it makes it so much more special if you save the first kiss till the wedding day" WHAT??? What if they are really sucky kissers and you're now stuck with a wet slobbery kisser for the rest of your life? Hey, to each his own. The Dugger's have a happier home life than ANYONE I know so they must be doing something right.

So, I go to bed last night and I'm flipping through the chanels and realize that the world is coming to an end. I mean, what is happening when they have televised the "National Rock, Paper, Scissors Championship". ???? That's right folks, it seems that our old game of throwing out hands to see who wins something is a.... dare I say.... Sport??? Tell me it ain't so!!! Of course, I got sucked in and had to see who one the ... get this... $50,000 grand prize. SHIT, If I knew I could win $50,000 for THAT, I would have been in a long time ago. What the Hell??? I just don't get it. I mean, seriously. What's more unbelievable is that they put it on TV. That's just wrong. I'm sure there are much better things people can be doing with their time. And yes, I know that I watched it, but that was only for a journalistic point of view so that I could report this nonsence to you.

I've only lost one pound this week. I'm not really happy with that, but I had to figure that I worked out 5 days straight and I'm sure I built a little bit of muscle. And considering that my body has never had an ounce of muscle on it, it probably weighs a lot. So, I'm down to 217 that's a 40 pound loss. 18 more pounds and we have a party!!!

Speaking of parties, it's October, which means we need to plan the November "toy party" (this is adult toys, not kid toys). I'm thinking November 15th. Let me know if that's ok for everyone. This is a boy girl party (cause it's more fun that way)

Ok, off to do my workout ..... again.... wwwaaaaaaahhhhHH!!!!

Before I go, I had to share this. (Thank you Margaret) There is a New Presidential Candidate... It's someone we know!
There's an effort to elect an unknown random person as President. I think this is an incredible idea! Watch this online video about the surprising new nominee:

http://www.tsgnet.com/pres.php?id=357563&altf=Lbzmfof&altl=Qfbsdf

OMG, I soooo did not want to get out of bed this morning. My alarm went off, and off and off... lol, but I got up to get Nick off to school. This past week he has been sleeping in. I'm gonna have to go buy him a cheap alarm clock cause he's a bear to wake up in the morning. It's so much easier if he's up playing the Wii when I get up cause then I can just get him moving. Otherwise I'm dragging him out of bed.

After getting him out the door I debated about whether to stay up or go back to sleep.... sleep won out. Calli crawled in with me at about 8 and I turned on Disney for her. She let me sleep till almost 10. Of course then I felt even more tired. The thought of going to work out was horrible. I thought about calling Lea and telling her I wasn't coming. BUT, I toughed it out and went anyway.

APPLAUSE TO ME!! Come on people, I want to hear some major ooo's and aahhh's. I did an ENTIRE WEEK of work outs. You should all be very proud of me.

My major thing to talk about today is that I got the new Jenny McCarthy book "Mother Warriors". It talks about her battle with her son's autism and has a bunch of other stories from parents. She is a huge believer in the vaccines causing autism. As I read through the book I was shocked at all the similarities. Not just in the autism characteristics, but in WHEN they became evident. Also that these kids (not all of them, but a good amount) can recover with the proper diet and vitamin supplements. WITHOUT MEDICATION.

One of the biggest eye openers was that a B 12 deficiency can cause a lot of the outburst behavior in autistic kids. I have a B12 deficiency and so does my niece, so much so that she has to have the shots for it. There are a bazillion tests you can do to find out what they are deficient on and what toxins and metals they are high on. And all of these things can be fixed.

They have these doctors called DAN! doctors (Defeat Autism Now) that only treat biomedically (no drugs). There is one in Hackettstown and I'm going to try to get in to see her. The biggest problem... insurance doesn't cover autism. How STUPID is that. They cover Nick's doctor's appointments and meds but that is because he also has ADHD and OCD. They wont cover speech therapy, occupational therapy, or group therapy. Thankfully his school offers all of this for free as part of their program. They most likely won't cover a DAN! doctor. But it's worth a shot.

Jenny is going to be on Ellen today, which starts now, so I'm gonna go watch it. I have more to tell you about the mercury in the vaccines and getting them while your kid was sick. Tomorrow.

I did my first workout today. It felt pretty good. Except for maybe the crunches (that made me want to throw up) but I'm sure as I continue it will get easier. Lea has no stomach at all, so it must work. We did the treadmill, the giselle thing (which takes a while to get used to) then we did stomach stuff. We were gonna do some yoga but we couldn't figure out how to use the dvd player. LOL She's gonna ask her hubby so we can do it tomorrow.

We'll be doing Monday - Friday at 11:30. I think working out 5 days a week is pretty good. Plus I'll still walk around the field at Nick's practices and Shelly offered to loan us back the elliptical, so I can do that at night. DAMNIT I'M GONNA BE SKINNY IF IT KILLS ME! And let me tell ya, those crunches damn near did kill me.

Nick's game is tonight at 6pm but it's not at Thomas Jefferson. It at the new fields on Main Street by Grandma's Attic. Come one come all. He's so excited that Shelly's coming. He keeps telling everyone. "Shelly's coming to watch me play!!" LOL So cute. Hopefully they at least score once tonight.

I got my unemployment checks today!! YAYYYYY!!!! I can pay the mortgage. WOO HOO!!!

That's it for now. I'm stinky and need a shower. See you tonight if your coming!

GAME ON!!

So far so good. The game should be Tuesday night at Thomas Jefferson. Most likely it will start at 6pm. Hope to see you all there!

Slow go on the weight loss. I'm at 218. Arg. I only did 1 protein shake last week. I know, I know!! I'll get back to it. I just wish they didn't take like shit.

We got a lot accomplished yesterday. John cleaned out the smoking room/sun room and then we tackled the play room. It was all Nick's stuff since we haven't moved Calli's back down yet. We made Nicky do "Keep one, toss one" He did great. Plus anything that was broken he tossed too. He is ready for Birthday and Christmas!! There's actually hardly anything in there now. It's amazing.

Now I have to take on Calli's room. Oh lord. That'll be fun. She has about 4,000 stuffed animals and she plays with all of them. Getting her to get rid of some is gonna be hard. She actually negotiated to keep one of Nick's trucks for herself yesterday though. She gave up a stuffed giraffe. At least I know she's got the concept. But then I have to figure out what to do with all those stuffed animals. They're all in like brand new condition. I really would like to sell them, but I don't think many people buy used stuffed animals. I'll probably have to freecycle them.

OH ya know what someone needs to invent.... Barbie hair that doesn't become a rats nest or that you can brush without pulling all the hair out. Am I right people??

Ok, off to shower and then to call Lea and see if she wants to start our workout regime today. TTFN

GAME CANCELLED

Tomorrow's football game has been cancelled. I guess no one wants to sit in the rain. It has been tentativly scheduled for Tuesday night at the TJ field. I'll let you know as soon as I do.

Saturday's Football Game Info

Saturday's game will be held at the Wharton Field folks. I know it's not right around the corner and it's supposed to rain, but he was really excited at the idea that some of you might come to watch him play. Game starts at 11:30 but feel free to come around noon or so. The games usually last about 1 1/2 hours. If you need directions, go here:

http://www.leaguelineup.com/location.asp?sid=222427210&url=jrpatriots&locationid=561967

Check out my AWESOME cousin!! She's on TV!! This is an episode of "The Secret Lives of Women".

Skip past the scary vampire lady. Go to about 2 minutes in. Laura is the first one you see talking at the table. OMG!! I wanna be on tv. :o(

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6orhXL7_vr8&feature=related

Crap, I can't remember how to make the you tube video just come up, so you're gonna have to click the link.

Nothing much going on here. Although, I got the worst mother of the year award yesterday. I totally forgot about gymnastics. She was PISSED. I'm going to call them and see if maybe she can make up the class.

Unemployment called yesterday. The went through all the questions and then said they were going to call work and get their side of the story or something like that. They said I would have a determination in a week. That I'd either get a check or a letter of denial. Well, jeeze, thanks.. uhm... how about a hint?? Nothing. The guy had NO sense of humor at all. Cross your fingers that it's a check folks!

Ok, gotta run. I posted on craigslist that I needed clothes for Calli and a lady has offered me some. Going to go pick them up. TTFN

Pics Pics and more Pics

Calli and Muffin napping

Our new pool - which is now empty cause it's been freaking cold
Lunch, pool side
It was THIS BIG MOM
Nick and his "girlfriend" Jackie
Nick and his AWESOME teacher Maryanne
Feeding the baby cow (what's up with the ladies face?)

Me too, Me tooDA BEARS
Feeding the animals

My Monkeys feeding their monkeys

Pony rides

Here is our pic with John (Bo Duke) Schnieder

Calli's first time at gymnastics which she LOVES by the way. If anyone is thinking of gifts for her for christmas/birthday, she would love to be able to continue this.

Going backwards on the balance beam

tumbling down the hill
forwards on the balance beam
Look how HIGH I can jump Mom!
Here comes my kartwheel

That's it for now. Football pictures to come.

Get this... yesterday at football practice, I did my normal walks around the field. On the second time around, Calli came with me and we decided to race. I JOGGED PEOPLE!! And it felt good. Not like normally where I would go about 10 feet and want to die right there. She couldn't keep up so we stopped and started a few times. But I think I probably did at least one turn around the field at a jog. Aren't you proud of me?!?! I am.

If I didn't fear that I would be squished like a squirrel on my road, I'd go around here. I have to find a place to go that's close by and doesn't risk my life. LOL

Mom called, told me to bribe Calli with a treat to see how many of the letters she actually knows. She said Andrea (my sister) did the same thing and she actually knew all her letters, she was just being a brat. LOL I'm gonna pick up some M&M's or something today just to test her out.

I put in a few applications for jobs. I really want to stay close to home, but there's not many jobs around here. We'll see what happens. I've had a lot of calls from job agencies, but I don't want to go that route just yet.

Hey Shelly, where are you? Long time no talk. Call me babe!

Well, it's Monday again...

Weight check... I am now 222 pounds. I think I miscalculated on my last weight check cause I've lost a few pounds since then. I am NOW down 35 pounds. I have been remembering to take my vitamins, but I'm still fighting against the shakes. YUCK! Calli and I are going to start doing some of the Fit TV workouts. LOL OH, and if I can find them, I'm pretty sure I have some kick boxing tapes somewhere... hmmm, I'll have to look for those.

This weekend went pretty well. Nick's team lost miserably again. 6-25. Oh well, they have fun. Someone has to loose, right? I didn't get to go to the game. I went to the Mary Kay Holiday workshop and then to Fashion Bug for their fashion show (we get names from it). The workshop was great. We had to leave early though which sucked, but I still got a lot of good info. A lot of ways to do a gift giving service for the holidays. Ya know, like, make a list of all the people you have to buy for and price ranges. I get it all together for you, wrap it and deliver it. It's really pretty cool. They also showed the new BIG MAMMA COMPACT. The last one we had was ridiculously huge. This one is much smaller, but still fits a ton of stuff. And, it's way prettier.

None of you have called me yet to say you've got people together... what's up with that? I'm going to put together a flyer or something that tells all my old customers that I'm back in business. Hopefully that will bring some business.

I did our homestead rebates today. Hopefully they won't screw it up again like last year. Our lots are split and we only pay about $100 a year in tax on the other property. Somehow that's the only info they had, so we got back $20! Uhm, yeah.... NO!! We got it straightened out, but it was a pain in the ass.

Question for all you mom's out there... Calli is 4 1/2. She can say her ABC's and can count pretty high, but she can't recognize them by sight. Is that normal? Nick was so ahead of the curve that he could tell you letters by the time he was 2. How can I help her learn them? I have flash cards that we've been using, but it doesn't seem to help much. Since she's not in preschool right now (no money) I want to be able to teach her something.

Off to clean... never ending. Oh we did get our kitchen back in order. John fixed the fridge and we moved the other one out. I'm not sure what to do with it now though. Keep it.. Sell it... Anyone need a fridge? $150

I'm at a loss people. I really don't want to go back to work, but we all know that's not even an option.

John thinks I should do Mary Kay full time (did you hear that Margaret??) But when you just start out in the business, it takes a while to get into the full swing and make some money. Not to mention the fact that I know that I'm REALLY LAZY!! Don't get me wrong, when I get to the people's house and start my thing, I have a BLAST! I love it. But, I hate all the work behind it. I hate having to call people, keeping track of everything, setting up. I procrastinate too much. Hell, Margaret told me to call 5 people I know to have them do a party and I still haven't done that!! 5 stinkin people, and I haven't done it. What the hell??? I am doing a fashion show this weekend which will give me some names to get off the ground with though.

I think maybe I'll look for something part time as well. Just to keep some definite money coming in. Part time wont be a lot of money, but it's something, and then I can supplement with MK.

There is one job here in town that is a full time Admin. I'm going to put in my application and see what they pay. If they'll pay me what I was making, I think maybe I'll take it. I don't know. I'm ready to just pack up and move to Utah or something.

I can't keep my mind straight. I'm forgetting things, I'm tired, totally out of it. I need to get myself back together. Ug, such is my life.

So anyway, I need five of you to get together 3-5 friends. Hell, I'll bring the wine! (Not guaranteeing good wine) Just get some friends together that have a little dough to spend. I need to get MK rolling. If you guys call me and say you have people, I'm going to have to get off my ass. Come on folks, save me!

OMG, I soooo did not want to get out of bed this morning. My alarm went off, and off and off... lol, but I got up to get Nick off to school. This past week he has been sleeping in. I'm gonna have to go buy him a cheap alarm clock cause he's a bear to wake up in the morning. It's so much easier if he's up playing the Wii when I get up cause then I can just get him moving. Otherwise I'm dragging him out of bed.

After getting him out the door I debated about whether to stay up or go back to sleep.... sleep won out. Calli crawled in with me at about 8 and I turned on Disney for her. She let me sleep till almost 10. Of course then I felt even more tired. The thought of going to work out was horrible. I thought about calling Lea and telling her I wasn't coming. BUT, I toughed it out and went anyway.

APPLAUSE TO ME!! Come on people, I want to hear some major ooo's and aahhh's. I did an ENTIRE WEEK of work outs. You should all be very proud of me.

My major thing to talk about today is that I got the new Jenny McCarthy book "Mother Warriors". It talks about her battle with her son's autism and has a bunch of other stories from parents. She is a huge believer in the vaccines causing autism. As I read through the book I was shocked at all the similarities. Not just in the autism characteristics, but in WHEN they became evident. Also that these kids (not all of them, but a good amount) can recover with the proper diet and vitamin supplements. WITHOUT MEDICATION.

One of the biggest eye openers was that a B 12 deficiency can cause a lot of the outburst behavior in autistic kids. I have a B12 deficiency and so does my niece, so much so that she has to have the shots for it. There are a bazillion tests you can do to find out what they are deficient on and what toxins and metals they are high on. And all of these things can be fixed.

They have these doctors called DAN! doctors (Defeat Autism Now) that only treat biomedically (no drugs). There is one in Hackettstown and I'm going to try to get in to see her. The biggest problem... insurance doesn't cover autism. How STUPID is that. They cover Nick's doctor's appointments and meds but that is because he also has ADHD and OCD. They wont cover speech therapy, occupational therapy, or group therapy. Thankfully his school offers all of this for free as part of their program. They most likely won't cover a DAN! doctor. But it's worth a shot.

Jenny is going to be on Ellen today, which starts now, so I'm gonna go watch it. I have more to tell you about the mercury in the vaccines and getting them while your kid was sick. Tomorrow.

OMG, I soooo did not want to get out of bed this morning. My alarm went off, and off and off... lol, but I got up to get Nick off to school. This past week he has been sleeping in. I'm gonna have to go buy him a cheap alarm clock cause he's a bear to wake up in the morning. It's so much easier if he's up playing the Wii when I get up cause then I can just get him moving. Otherwise I'm dragging him out of bed.

After getting him out the door I debated about whether to stay up or go back to sleep.... sleep won out. Calli crawled in with me at about 8 and I turned on Disney for her. She let me sleep till almost 10. Of course then I felt even more tired. The thought of going to work out was horrible. I thought about calling Lea and telling her I wasn't coming. BUT, I toughed it out and went anyway.

APPLAUSE TO ME!! Come on people, I want to hear some major ooo's and aahhh's. I did an ENTIRE WEEK of work outs. You should all be very proud of me.

My major thing to talk about today is that I got the new Jenny McCarthy book "Mother Warriors". It talks about her battle with her son's autism and has a bunch of other stories from parents. She is a huge believer in the vaccines causing autism. As I read through the book I was shocked at all the similarities. Not just in the autism characteristics, but in WHEN they became evident. Also that these kids (not all of them, but a good amount) can recover with the proper diet and vitamin supplements. WITHOUT MEDICATION.

One of the biggest eye openers was that a B 12 deficiency can cause a lot of the outburst behavior in autistic kids. I have a B12 deficiency and so does my niece, so much so that she has to have the shots for it. There are a bazillion tests you can do to find out what they are deficient on and what toxins and metals they are high on. And all of these things can be fixed.

They have these doctors called DAN! doctors (Defeat Autism Now) that only treat biomedically (no drugs). There is one in Hackettstown and I'm going to try to get in to see her. The biggest problem... insurance doesn't cover autism. How STUPID is that. They cover Nick's doctor's appointments and meds but that is because he also has ADHD and OCD. They wont cover speech therapy, occupational therapy, or group therapy. Thankfully his school offers all of this for free as part of their program. They most likely won't cover a DAN! doctor. But it's worth a shot.

Jenny is going to be on Ellen today, which starts now, so I'm gonna go watch it. I have more to tell you about the mercury in the vaccines and getting them while your kid was sick. Tomorrow.

OMG, I soooo did not want to get out of bed this morning. My alarm went off, and off and off... lol, but I got up to get Nick off to school. This past week he has been sleeping in. I'm gonna have to go buy him a cheap alarm clock cause he's a bear to wake up in the morning. It's so much easier if he's up playing the Wii when I get up cause then I can just get him moving. Otherwise I'm dragging him out of bed.

After getting him out the door I debated about whether to stay up or go back to sleep.... sleep won out. Calli crawled in with me at about 8 and I turned on Disney for her. She let me sleep till almost 10. Of course then I felt even more tired. The thought of going to work out was horrible. I thought about calling Lea and telling her I wasn't coming. BUT, I toughed it out and went anyway.

APPLAUSE TO ME!! Come on people, I want to hear some major ooo's and aahhh's. I did an ENTIRE WEEK of work outs. You should all be very proud of me.

My major thing to talk about today is that I got the new Jenny McCarthy book "Mother Warriors". It talks about her battle with her son's autism and has a bunch of other stories from parents. She is a huge believer in the vaccines causing autism. As I read through the book I was shocked at all the similarities. Not just in the autism characteristics, but in WHEN they became evident. Also that these kids (not all of them, but a good amount) can recover with the proper diet and vitamin supplements. WITHOUT MEDICATION.

One of the biggest eye openers was that a B 12 deficiency can cause a lot of the outburst behavior in autistic kids. I have a B12 deficiency and so does my niece, so much so that she has to have the shots for it. There are a bazillion tests you can do to find out what they are deficient on and what toxins and metals they are high on. And all of these things can be fixed.

They have these doctors called DAN! doctors (Defeat Autism Now) that only treat biomedically (no drugs). There is one in Hackettstown and I'm going to try to get in to see her. The biggest problem... insurance doesn't cover autism. How STUPID is that. They cover Nick's doctor's appointments and meds but that is because he also has ADHD and OCD. They wont cover speech therapy, occupational therapy, or group therapy. Thankfully his school offers all of this for free as part of their program. They most likely won't cover a DAN! doctor. But it's worth a shot.

Jenny is going to be on Ellen today, which starts now, so I'm gonna go watch it. I have more to tell you about the mercury in the vaccines and getting them while your kid was sick. Tomorrow.

So we had our first MAJOR clutz incident on Friday.

We were over a friends house and Calli had gone upstairs to play. I was in the kitchen and heard a huge BANG. But no tears or anything after, so didn't go running or anything. Just figured one of the kids dropped something. 1 minute later I hear Calli coming down the stairs saying, "MMmmaa maa, I hurt myself". THEN I went running.

I get to the bottom of the stairs and see blood coming from her forehead. I yell to Lea to ask where the bathroom is (it was our first time there) and she came around the corner and turned white. Ready to run back to grab the phone so she could dial 911, I just asked again where the bathroom was. (Ha, just realized this second that I could have just used the kitchen sink. HA, oh well). By the time we got to the bathroom she was covered in blood. She saw her self in the mirror and her eyes got so big and she said, "MOM, I'M BLEEDING!!". Normally when she said that it was a scratch or a tiny drop of blood, now she knows what it really means to bleed. Poor kid. Lea grabbed a bunch of paper towels and I started cleaning her up expecting to find a huge gash in her head. When I finally got it cleared, all she had was a tiny little hole. But that sucker was bleeding good.

After wringing out the paper towels for about the 5th time, I finally got the bleeding to stop. Lea told me that she had a cross on the door upstairs. It was made out of building blocks and spelled out Jesus Loves Me. Calli must have tried to open the door and it fell off and hit her in the head. HA, Jesus didn't love her that day. LOLOL

She had a little head ache that night, but nothing else. She's fine now. The Clutz strikes again!

Weight check... I'm down about 35 pounds. Still have to drink more of my protein shakes and remember to take my vitamins. I'm working on it.

Ok, gonna go do some job hunting. woopee. :o(

I know I haven't written in a while, but the rain just never stops falling around here.

Fridge, cars, bills.... AND, to top it all off.... I got let go on Tuesday. I was told that they decided that they needed someone that could work in the city. Freaking wonderful.

Amazingly I didn't panic as much as I should have. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's just being in shock or something. Who knows.

We did end up getting a cheap fridge, so I don't need one of those anymore. But if anyone knows about a JOB!! THAT would be great!

Honestly, I'd rather not work at all. Just stay here and deal with the house and kids. Unfortunately, the bill man doesn't like that idea. We could never pay our bills on just John's salary.

I am getting back into my Mary Kay. That will at least bring in some money. So all you people with skin out there, start thinking of 3-6 people that you want over your house for a few drinks one night. I expect at least 3 or 4 of my friends/family to hold a party for me to get me off the ground since I'm basically going to have to start over.

No nervous break down yet... although I am about to go through all my bills, that should bring it on nicely. Yay ME!

Oh, Nick's first real football game is this Saturday at home. Let me know if you're interested and I'll give you directions.

When it rains... if FUCKING POURS!!!

The cars are both in need of repair.. The freaking van driver's side door hasn't opened since Memorial day so I've been climbing over the passenger side for months.

We're a month behind on both mortgages, plus all the other freaking bills. They're gonna shut everything off soon. Which wouldn't be a big deal except for the fact that I work from home and need electric and internet.

The fridge died yesterday. We got someone out to look at it today and he said that we're basically screwed. The part we need is really hard to find and would cost a minimum of $300. He said might as well by a new one.

And the electric company showed up today and said $1,700 or they shut us off. Like I had that money. I wrote them a check anyway in hopes of figuring something out before they cash it.

I hate my life right now. Why do we have to use money? I don't get it. Why can't we go back to bardering???

I took all my jewelry down to the "we buy gold" place and the guy only offered me $98 for my wedding rings. I told him hell no. And the price for the other stuff was equally as bad.

Ok, so, basically, if anyone has a fridge they're not using... I NEED IT BADLY!!!!

Just shoot me now.

I forgot to tell my story from the weekend. On Saturday I drove down the shore to my Aunt's house for my little cousin's 3rd birthday. He's the cutest little thing you've ever seen. We had a really fun day. The kids played football in the yard. The funniest thing was that Calli wiped the floor with the boys and made 2 touchdowns! HA LOL

So we pack it up to drive home. John calls (he had to go to some safety training thing for work) and said he had the guy he car pooled with drop him off about 7 - 8 miles away from our house and that he was walking home. (the guy was annoying and John didn't want to sit in the car with him anymore. lol Cause we all know how patient John is!) So I was like, well we've left already, so I'll pick you up about 1/2 way home.

Did you know that sun glare can make it so that you can't see any signs on the highway? I ended up on the wrong highway. Lordy. But, it was 1 & 9. I said, no big deal, I can take that up. Forgetting of course that I had to get on 78. So, me and the kids took a lovely trip through Newark, Jersey City and Hoboken (for those of you that don't live around here... not the BEST areas of Jersey). We went over the lovely Polaski Skyway (that's scary). So, as we're driving dangerously close to the Holland Tunnel, Nick's in the back seat yelling, "CALLI, Look, the Empire State Building!! We're going to New York!!" Considering I had all of $10 on me and the tunnel costs like $8 or something, I said, Not if I can help it!! John called and said, How's it going.... Not so good honey. LOL

After driving around Hoboken for about 20 minutes, I finally found signs to get me back where I was going. Needless to say, a drive that should have taken about an hour, hour and a half took me 2 1/2 hours. The funniest thing... I picked up John about 1/4 mile from our house! LOL Poor guy.

Well, at least it showed how much the kids really want to go into the city. HA Maybe when we have some money we'll take a trip in. Go to the top of the Empire State Building. That'll be fun. I've been wanting to take them to the Central Park Zoo anyway. We're booked up for quite a while. FOOTBALL!!

OH, Nick got weighed in last night and he ... MADE WEIGHT!! YAYAYAYAYAY We're very happy. This week is all football. Practice Monday - Thursday, a pep rally on Friday and a scrimmage on Saturday. At least he's enjoying it.

Our roomates are moving out Sunday/Monday. She's getting the truck Sunday but can't move into the house until Monday. We're going to help her pack up on Sunday, but we have plans with Shelly for Monday. So my house will finally be stinky dog free next week!! YAYAY

Here's a good story for you. Last night Heather and I are sitting here watching one of those documentaries on the Duggers (the family with 17 kids) and I hear Maggie outside barking like crazy. Then I hear what sounded like garbage cans outside. THEN, I put 2 and 2 together and said, Oh shit, BEAR. So we run out to the deck and peak around to see if we can see it. Then realize it wasn't the garbage cans, it was Heather's cooler. That's the second time they got the cooler. LOL She like, damnit, get me a flashlight. I said, what are you gonna do when a 500 pound black bear decides not to give you back your cooler???? Dumb Ass. We went up to my room and went out the back deck to look. He had the cooler dragged up into the back yard and we heard him back in the woods. He didn't come back out.

UNTIL... lol. I went out this morning to take Calli to school and saw that he decided the cooler didn't have enough in it (juice boxes and snack stuff for Heather's kids) cause one of the garbage cans was pulled back there too and opened all over. Damn Bears!! At least be out there when we're looking for you so we can take your picture!! hee hee hee

Ok, now that I talked long enough to avoid work.... gotta go do some.