FYI - I am putting a ton of stuff on ebay. Right now I have a bunch of my clothes on there, so if you're a size 18, check it out. I'll also be putting up more clothes and a ton of kids clothes soon. If any of my blog readers buy I'll throw in free shipping! My seller name is oklene.

I've been told that Calli looks like my sister Dana who passed away when she was very young. I went through some pictures to see if I could compare and the pics I have of Dana... they don't look that much alike. BUT, in my search I found these...

Except for the fact that my hair is darker, she could be my twin. It's pretty scary. Actually, we showed the pictures to the kids and they both said it was Calli. LOL Looks the same to me, even down to the crappy hair cuts. Sorry I couldn't make the pictures of me any bigger. Couldn't figure out how.

I also wanted to share my handsome boy with you...

And had to share my super cute kitties who just love each other...

They actually will just lay like that and give eachother a lick. Too cute.

No cabbage needed!!

Nick's team kicked ASS!!! It was a really long day though. We got there at 8:30. They started the parade at 9. The kids then all had to stand there while a bunch of speeches were made. Then we had about 45 min to kill before the game started at 10:30. Mom came which was cool and so did my in-laws who I haven't seen or spoken too in almost 2 years. hee hee hee. My father-in-law talked to me and was very nice. My mother-in-law wouldn't talk to me at all. Oh well. HA

The game started at 10:30 and by 1pm the next 2 teams were standing there waiting to get on the field. We actually had to stop the game at the top of the 6th. We won 23 to 13 AND we didn't get our final at bat. YAYAY. I was thinking our team wasn't all that great. Turns out NONE of the teams are great and we're pretty good! YAYAY.

Nick only had one big meltdown which is pretty good considering. He hit the ball and ran his butt off to first base but was tagged out. He was PISSED! Then he decided he wasn't playing until I gave him lunch. Uhm, there's no lunch in baseball! I gave him some carrots and sent him back out on the field. He held it together for the rest of the game.

Ever see the Basking Robbins commercial with the Grandma that's been watching the kids that trashed her house? "These little angles??" KABOOM!! HA, That's my mom and my kids. LOL I always picture my mom jumping over that explosion. LOL

Why does Rachel Ray wear clothes that make her look fat?? I kept telling Shelly that Rachel got really fat. Today she's wearing form fitting clothes. Turns out she's not fat. She's got a flat stomach and is really fit. I don't understand why she wears clothes that make her look round. She still has man hands though. LOVE HER! I put in for tickets to go to the show.

Ok, going to start taking pictures of stuff for e-bay. Type atcha later.

Today's Did you know: The largest turkey in the world weighed in at 86 pounds. It was raised by Leacroft Turkeys, Ltd. in Petersborough, United Kingdom. *** Wow, that turkey might actually be enough to feed our family for Thanksgiving. I Aunt Pat has to cook 2 HUGE turkey's every year. It's insane. Yummy, but crazy!

Today's Stupid Law: Speaking of the United Kingdom, here's one from them - Any person found breaking a boiled egg at the sharp end will be sentenced to 24 hours in the village stocks (enacted by Edward VI). *** DAMN, They're really strict over there. I didn't even know eggs had a sharp end.

I think I've lost my touch. I read my past posts and realized I was much more interesting a few months ago. I wonder if it's because I'm home now? I don't have all those people at work to talk about. Hmm. Not that I would give this up. It's just to good. But I feel bad for all you readers.

The only things I can really talk about now are how my house is a mess, how my kids are insane and what's on tv. OH speaking of what's on tv... that bear that was in paramus yesterday... They found it, tagged it, sedated it and guess where they brought it?? UP HERE!! Ha. Someone must have read my blogged. They packed him up and shipped him to Sussex County. The bugger's probably walking around my back yard. If I see him, I'll take a picture for ya.

I guess you'll all just have to deal with me talking about stupid things.

Nick had baseball practice yesterday and the coach told them that the parade and first game is on Saturday. He also told them they will probably be on tv. So today Nick asked me how many breaks they would have to take. Huh? What do you mean? Well, mom, we'll have to take breaks so the tv can take commercial breaks. LOL HA, how funny is that. He's more excited about being on the tv than he is about playing in his first game.

While we were at practice I was talking to one of the other mom's who I know from a parenting class we went to. She is separated from her husband and renting a house. She told me that she has to move out for 2 months because the owners use the house as a summer home. She can move back in after that but was kinda lost at what to do for the summer. I offered for them to come and stay with us. She was actually thrilled with the idea. She offered to pay me $1,200 a month!! I told her that was way to much money. Her sister lives with her too, so I told her to discuss it with her and then let me know what they think.

Hmmm, guess I should tell John we may be having company. HA. Hey, I figure it'll be good for everyone. They'll have a place to stay and we'll get some extra cash. We'll see what happens.

Everyone wish Nick luck tomorrow on his first game!!

Today's Did You Know: Babe Ruth wore a cabbage leaf under his cap while playing baseball, and he used to changed it every two innings. *** Anyone know where I can find cabbage on sale?? Nick's team is gonna need all the help they can get!

Today's Stupid Law: Ok, these two are from NY. I'm doing two because I have an issue.... 1. Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used as a business. 2. It is illegal for a woman to be on the street wearing “body hugging clothing. *** Uhm, it's ok to be ne'kid, but not to be completely covered albeit in tight clothes? Does anyone else have a problem with that?? I bet a MAN made that law!

Ok, so as I'm sure you have all noticed, I haven't put any updates of my diet on here. Well, the reason for that... I didn't stick to it. Of course. I never stick to anything. I'm lazy. Although it made me feel really good and woke my ass up, I still just don't "want" to do it.

So I went ahead and took the next step. John and I went to a seminar last night on the Lap-band and Gastric bypass surgeries. I wanted more information. To see if I qualified for it. I think I qualify. If your BMI (Body Mass Index) is 35 and you have added illness on top of that like high blood pressure, diabetes, etc. then you qualify. If you have a BMI of 40 you automatically qualify without needing any other circumstances. My BMI is 39. I don't have any of the major circumstances, but I do have spondalolysthesis (my broken back), arthritis in both my knees, hypoglycemia, and my funky heart thing which is all exastrabated by the weight. So we'll see what they say.

I made an apointment to have a consultation with the surgeon next friday and the physc and nutritional appointments (required) the following week.

I am looking at the Lap-band surgury. My aunt had the bypass and had a LOT of complications. It really scared me. I don't think I can do that. The lap-band is a lot less invasive and it's completely reversable. So god forbid something happens, it can be fixed. These surgeons also have a zero percent mortality rate for lap band. Their gastric rate is 1 in 400-500. Although those are good rates, unless it's 1 in a million, it's too risky. I don't want to die to loose weight. Not worth it. If that's the choice, I'll stay an alive fat cow.

New subject... what's up with the bears lately??? Is there something in the air? We got one killing it's trainer and another roaming around in Paramus. I think it's hysterical that they cancelled all the outdoor activities until they find it. When you live in the sticks like I do, you get used to it. If a bear is outside, oh well. That's life. We live in their town, not the other way around. You leave them alone and they'll go on their way and then you can do what you need to do. It's not worth everyone freaking out. Stupid City Folk!!

Today's Did You Know: A person remains conscious for eight seconds after being decapitated. **** Ok, a couple things on this one. First, how do they know? Who tested this theory? "Bob, I want you to lay here. We're gonna cut your head off. You keep talking until your dead so we know when you loose consciousness." "Ok, but someone's gotta hold my sign!" Second, OMG, You're conscious for eight second??? That's gotta be the longest eight seconds ever. I always thought that would be a good way to go. You don't feel anything. Well shit, your head falls off and you fall on the floor and look up and see your body! AAAAHHHHH NO

Today's stupid Laws: Here's one from Alabama - You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time. ** Well, that SHOULD be illegal. You'd not only ruin your pants, but you'd crush a perfectly good ice cream cone!!

Child for sale!!

I have a beautiful little 4 year old girl, packed and ready to go. Selling cheap. Hell, I'll pay you to take her!!

Oh lord save me. She is a flipping nightmare. She is ten times worse than Nick ever was. She is a complete horror. She does what she wants, when she wants and it's basically "Screw You" if you have other plans. She'll tell you NO flat out. You tell her to do something, she wont even look at you. When you do get her to look at you, she'll just stand there and not do anything. She is so strong willed it's going to kill me.

Yesterday I kept her home from school. Don't ask me why, I have no idea. But let me tell you... never again. Sleep away MILITARY SCHOOL!! I was ready to either tear all my hair out or beat the ever loving crap out of her. She was just completely HORRID. We sent her to bed at 7pm and unplugged her tv (cause even though we said no tv, she had it on anyway. - and not just unplugged because of course she would just plug it back in, but disconnected from the cable, which she hasn't figured out.... yet).

Today she WENT TO SCHOOL!! I had a much better day. Is that mean? Am I a horrible mother that I can't wait to get my daughter out of the house??? It was just me and Nick here today. He hung out in his room most of the time putting legos together. He made a really cool fire truck today. Then he helped me work. LOL Well, not really, but he thought he was helping. I was logging stuff in and had a bunch of papers and I handed them to him when I was done and he put them all together for me. He was very cute. I love it when it's just the two of us... he's just the sweetest thing.

Then of course John came home all cranky and RUINED IT!!

Whatever. Finally broke down around 4pm and went to pick up the brat from school. I had packed the bikes in the van and we went to the fields to ride. And then we did some baseball practice.

Nick's first game is Saturday. It's going to be a long day. We have to be at the field at 8:30am for the opening day parade and then we have a game at 10:30. Oh joy. He's gonna be wiped out before the game even starts. We'll load him up on meds... he'll be good to go. HA

Speaking of meds. His dr. changed them around again. It's hard to keep track of it sometimes. Now she's got him taking something at 1pm. So he'll have to take it at school. Arg.

Ok, I'm off for now. I actually worked all day today and still have some more to do. Write atcha later.

Today's Did You Know: Mark Twain while staying overnight at the house of a friend, once threw a pillow at the window of the bedroom he was sleeping in (well, attempting to sleep in).
When the satisfying crash let in what he thought was fresh air, he fell asleep at last. In the morning he discovered that he had broken a glass-enclosed bookcase. **** From what I hear, Mark Twain really enjoyed the bottle. I'm sure he was wasted and didn't know the difference.

Today's Stupid Law: Here's one from good ole' Jersey - It is illegal to wear a bullet-proof vest while committing a murder. **** If you're a murderer, do you generally do things legally?? Oh, crap, I can't slice that guy into little tiny bits right now, I'm wearing my vest. Excuse me sir, can you just stand there for one moment while I take this off? Then I'll be happy to tear you apart. Hmmm, Uh, NO.

Hey, I just want to let you know that I talk about EVERYONE on here. EVERYONE. I don't say anything about anyone to be vindictive. I don't try to hurt people's feelings EVER!!

When I talk on my blog, I talk about everything that happens to me and around me. If you take offense I'm sorry. But such is life.

If I write something about someone that I think should be kept low key, but would make for a good read, I keep the names out of it. That way no one knows who I'm talking about and they can still get a good laugh.

Really people, please don't take offense at what I write. And if you do, please don't read it. I refuse to sensor myself any more than I actually do. I think I've been really good.

Sorry if I hurt your feelings. I didn't mean it and it actually wasn't directed at you anyway. I just meant that stuff like that happens all the time and I thought it was really funny. I wasn't calling you out on anything.

Now that the service announcement is complete, I need to call work and see if they have anything for me to do.

Here to catch you all up. I know I've been off for a while.

Casino night was a blast! We had so much fun. It was me, John, Michelle, Tim, Mark, Kim, Donna, Steve and their daughter Christine. We got there and had some really good food, toured all the prizes and had a few free drinks. Then we went in to start playing. I learned how to play craps which was really fun. Michelle played it really well and they won a boat load of money. We tried out most of the games but ended up playing craps most of the time. Towards the end of the night I went over to the blackjack table that Donna had been at all night. I sat down with her and put down a five dollar chip. The guy next to me said, No No No, put down more. I said I don't play this very well, I don't want to loose it. So he gave me two $100 chips and made me bet both. I couldn't believe my eyes when I won!! I then played a couple more hands before I noticed that the dealer was "helping" us along. She watched the cards go down and did a... "you need a two, here ya go, you need a 10, here ya go" kind of thing. LOL So basically, you couldn't loose. She let us play a game of black jack go fish. She gave each of us two cards and we had to grab from other players fast and make a good hand. That was really fun. We went in with $1500. When I got to that table at the end of the night we were down about $400. When I left that table 5 min later, I was up to about $2,600. HA!! We like that dealer. HAAHAHAHA.

After that, they shut down the casino part and we all had to go cash in. When you cashed in, you got sheets of tickets for the tricky tray. John and I had sheets and sheets of tickets. The only thing that sucked was ripping them all apart. What a pain. LOL We put lots in the 50in plasma flat screen tv... unfortunately, we didn't win it. Boooooo While I was finishing putting the tickets in, they started calling the numbers. We won the first 3 prizes right off the bat! LOL HA WE ROCK! We ended up winning 5 of the prizes!! We won:
#1) a dog basket filled with stuff like brushes and shampoos, gourmet treats and puppy perfume (which works really good by the way I figure it's about $50)

#2) free gymnastics for a month $58 plus 2 free ice skating and rentals coupons $25 maybe

#3) a foursome of golf at some golf course in Sparta (we gave that to Donna since they're big golfers, I can't golf, and they invited us to come to this and hadn't won anything - my cousin said that would probably be about $300)

#4) a $50 gift certificate for dinner at Carrado's in Clifton.

#5) a Fathead of Batman (this is kind of like those clingy things you stick to your windows, except it sticks to your walls and is life size. They run about $100)

We totally made up the money we spent to go. Actually, we doubled it! YAYAY US!!

We all had a really good time. Well, wait, John and I had a really good time, cause we kept winning! Everyone else had fun. I will say that the "open bar" was taken a little to literally and someone was praising the porcelain gods by the end of the night (not mentioning any names). Hee Hee Hee. Let's just say they regretted it severely.

After the benefit, John and I dropped the gang off at Michelle's and headed to Smiles which is a go-go bar by us. Our neighbor works their so I thought it would be fun. Unfortunately it's not a nude bar cause in Jersey if you serve alcohol, you can't be ne-kid. So unfair. Although, when I went in to go potty, I did get to see one of the really hot chicks completely ne-kid while she was changing. Ooo Baby.

We're gonna hit a real strip club one of these days. We just have to find one that's not completely raunchy.

Yesterday we went to mom's for my stepfather's 60th birthday. What a beautiful day it was. I had to borrow some shorts from mom cause it was so hot. The kids stayed outside all day. They were pooped by the time we got home. The entire gang was there. Even Bob's kids came. Of course, because it's my family, drama HAD to ensue, if only in the slightest. My Uncle took my brother-in-law aside and bitched at him about some work that he did on a car that isn't right or something. I only know half the story, but supposedly the work was done like 2 years ago. Who knows, but of course that brought on some bad vibes. Typical. Nothing in my family can be drama free. The rest of the day went great though.

Today mom came over because they were doing the Barks garage sale at Wild West City. The garage sale is HUGE and ends up being really cheap. I got 2 huge book shelves for $35. You can buy a bunch of little stuff and take it upfront and they'll charge you like $5 for everything. They're very reasonable.

So these book shelves... I went to put them in the back of mom's car - ducked in the back to move something and smashed my head into the roof, feeling and hearing my neck crunch down into my shoulders. It hurt my head. But that sound... I was just thinking... that's not good. Of course in the last hour or so my neck has tensed up, the top of my head hurts and my back and shoulders are in serious pain. I think I'm in trouble. Wonderful.

Anyway, the shelves are really nice. I put all our movies and dvd's on them (which took up all of the shelves - Blockbuster anyone!) I was able to clean up a lot of that little side room. Finally.

Ok, I'm hurting a lot now so I'm signing off. I think that caught you all up reasonably well. Adios

Today's Did You Know: In Tennessee, shooting any game other than whales from a moving automobile is against the law. **** Ok, I may have been out of school for a pretty long time, but I'm pretty sure that Tennessee is landlocked. So, uhm.. why/how could someone shoot a whale. Not to mention..... is there a lot of drive by huntings in good old TN? I mean, ok, I understand if you lazy and all, but isn't it easier to go to the supermarket and grab a steak than to shoot a deer doing 80 on the highway, then having to pull over, find the damn thing, skin and clean it??? Hmm, maybe it's just me.

Two days in the city for work. I LOVE the city. I enjoy the hustle and bustle of all the people. The sites, the sounds, the smells. It just makes me smile. I know most people despise going to the city (for those of you who don't know, I mean New York City) for the same reasons that I love it.

I took the train in. Both mornings I nearly missed the train. I can't leave until Nick gets picked up and then I have to drop off Calli and then race my ass to the train station. Today I had about 10 seconds to spare because Calli screamed like crazy in the car because we forgot her pillow and I couldn't go back, which of course made her have to pee. So pit stop at Quick Check.

Today was interesting. A typical day in NYC. As I walked to the office I saw a woman standing on the corner waiting to cross the street in a strapless wedding gown. Just standing there waiting like it was no big deal. LOL At lunch I went to a dollar store. Not a normal dollar store. A NYC dollar store, which had FOUR FLOORS!! LOL Our office is in the middle of the fashion district so for many blocks in either direction you can see the most beautiful clothes, shoes and fabrics. Just lovely.

Yesterday Donna and I went shopping for tiaras. HA! We're going to that benefit on Friday and the theme is Denim and Diamonds. So all of the girls are doing it up with style. Being in NY and in the fashion district, it only took us 3 stores to find what we wanted. We found other tiaras, but we didn't want to spend $150!!! We found the Cinderella Club. PERFECT.

Now I have to find clothes to wear and more jewelry. I'll do that Thursday since I have to go into the city again tomorrow. Then I think I'll hit the dollar store around here and see what nonsense toy jewelry I can find.. I plan to go over the top completely! LOL I'm gonna have FUN!

The band, Five for Fighting, is generously donating $0.49 to Autism Speaks for *each time* the video is viewed the funding goes toward research studies to help find a cure. When you have a moment, please visit the link below to watch the video and pass it along to your friends and family. They are aiming for 10,000 hits,
but hopefully we can help them to surpass this goal.

http://www.whatkindofworlddoyouwant.com/videos/view/id/408214

Mike was going to be married to Karen so his father sat him down for a
little chat.
He said, "Mike, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our
honeymoon suite, I took off my pants, handed them to your mother, and said,
here - try these on."
She did and said, "These are too big, I can't wear them."
"Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will."
Ever since that night, we have never had any problems.

Hmmm..., thought Mike. He thought that might be a good thing to try on his
honeymoon.

Mike took off his pants and said to Karen,
"Here - try these on."
She tried them on and said, "These are too large. They don't fit me."
Mike said, "Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will. I
don't want you to ever forget that."

Then Karen took off her pants and handed them to Mike. She said, "Here- you
try on mine."
He did and said, "I can't get into your pants."
Karen said, "Exactly. And if you don't change your smart-ass attitude, you
never will.

***** NUFF SAID!!

What to talk about today.... hmm..

Calli woke up around 2:30 with a very soar throat. I loaded the humidifier back up and took about 1/2 hour to get her to swallow some tylenol. She was hurting so much she had a lot of trouble with it.

Today she's hardly been able to drink or eat anything. Poor kid.

I've had a runny nose for a few days and this morning woke up with a cough. I'm hoping it's allergies. I never used to have them, but it seems that I've gotten them to some degree over the past few years. Joy.

Nicky is sitting at the computer with Calli playing her game. He's being so sweet to her. Right now he's singing to her tell her he loves her. LOL Ahhh, if only he could always be like that.

Nick started baseball practice over the weekend. I took him to the second one last night. He did really well. He's about in the middle on talent compared to the other kids so I'm really happy about that. We're not a sports family, so I was worried that he'd be in trouble and totally lost. His only issue is not understanding that he can't catch every single ball that goes out into the field. If he's on third and the ball is hit between first and second, he's running for it. He got really pissy that the other kids were getting it first. LOL

Then there's the fact that he runs like a girl! I actually yelled to him yesterday "Stop gliding like a girl! Pick up your knees when you run!!" Hee hee hee, I know, I'm a mean and horrible mother. Get over it! (which is what I tell him every day)

Beautiful weather today. In the 70's. Calli and I went for a walk and then went across the street to feed the swans and the fish. Hopefully it stays that way. I can't wait for Calli to go back to school. I have plans!! In the warm weather I'll be able to go outside and do some real gardening. YAY.

I'm going to start selling a bunch of crap on Ebay soon. I was going to start it today, but I actually got work to do. The kids need summer clothes, so I have to get to sellin! Anyone want anything??? I'll sell it to ya cheap!!

Ya know, now that I'm not out.... I have a lot less to talk about. Not to mention that I know some of the people that read this and would love to talk shit about them, but can't, cause I know they read it. I don't want to burn any bridges. If any of you are starting to get bored, let me know. I'll start making shit up.

Today's Did You Know: The first novel, called The story of Genji, was written in 1007 by Japanese noble woman, Murasaki Shikibu. ***It's funny to think that there were no books back then. No one thought to write anything down?? Odd.

Incentive Checks from the Government

Here ya go folks... Go to this site and it will tell you when you will be receiving your money!

http://www.irs.gov/irs/article/0,,id=180250,00.html

YOU'RE WELCOME!!

Actually, scratch that... Thank Mississippi Valerie!

So, I'm sure you've all seen on the news about this "guy" who is pregnant. HA!! When I first saw the news about it, I was very surprised. Shocked even. WOW, how did that happen, amazing.

AND THEN>... You see the entire story. It's not a "guy", it's a transexual. He used to be a woman and decided that she was a he and traded in her va j j for a ding dong. Actually, I'm really confused, because on the View today they said he/she took testosterone so he/she could grow a tiny penis and have sex with his/her partner. I wonder if they meant his/her partner did. Oh, who knows, I'm so confused.

ANYWAY, So this shim is now having a baby. It shouldn't really surprise anyone that's it's actually a woman. Cause there is NO WAY IN HELL that an actual man would EVER get pregnant. And not just because it's physically impossible but because there is NO WAY they would be able to handle it.

We all know that a small cold can put a guy flat on his back for at least a week proclaiming that he is indeed DYING. Trading in a runny nose and a cough for vomiting about 15 times a day, mood swings, hot/cold sweats, cravings (oh that one they can handle), swelling with enough fluid to fill a small pool, and back pain.... would never happen.

And THEN... the contractions and hours of labor. Not to mention pushing a watermelon out a hole the size of a grape. There's just no way. Although, I think they would be thrilled with having their boobs grow 3 sizes. I'm sure they'd be molesting themselves constantly... well that is of course only at those few fleeting moments in the day where they don't feel like they are going to rip open at the slightest touch because they are so full.

If something happened to women and the only way to procreate was for men to carry the babies..... Goodbye Man Kind. Oh don't get me wrong, I'm sure a couple of guys will step up and try to be all macho... "Oh, there's nothing to it, I can handle that". But let them get out of the hospital after pushing out that truck and see what they tell all their friends. Word will spread so fast they'll be shutting down maternity/paternity wards within a month.

Today's Did You Know: During pregnancy, the average woman's uterus expands up to five hundred times its normal size. **** Ha, sounds like a guys Beer Belly!!

Sounds that make you move faster than light speed:

The horn of a tractor trailer right behind you

The fire alarm

A scream for help

A child who is sleeping in bed with you who wakes up at 1:30 AM and says, Mamma, my tummy's gonna be sick.

Unfortunately for the last one, light speed isn't always fast enough. I jumped up, she puked, I grabbed her to run to the bathroom and she threw up all over me. It was GREAT! Changing the bed at 2am was an eye opener. Calli said, I wont throw up on your bed again Mamma. LOL Like she could help it.

She went to bed around 5pm last night (late nap) and slept right through... well except for the above. She had gotten up about 12:30 with a nightmare and was awake off and on until the puking. I was pretty much awake and talking to her. I had just fallen to sleep when the aforementioned statement was made.

The alarm went off at 6:30 and I got up with Nick (who had a nightmare and ended up in bed with us too) Got him ready and out the door and she didn't want to wake up. She slept till 9:15. She up now, but taking it pretty easy.

Mr. Riccio passed away. For those of you who don't know, Mr. Riccio was my neighbor at the Rockaway house my entire life. Actually, his sister is married to my grandma's brother, so they are related to us somehow. It's gonna be really bizarre not having him there. He was a staple of George Street. Always there to tell you that your lawn needed cutting or to ask how you were feeling. He had stories that could go on forever and ever. But he was a really good man and will be dearly missed.

Today's Did You Know: Most insects are edible. According to eatbug.com, there are 1,462 recorded species of edible insects. And they're quite nutritious. For instance, 100 grams of cricket contains only 121 calories, less than half of beef. A cricket contains only 5,5 grams of fat, compared to 21,2g of beef. Beef contains more protein (23,5g - a cricket 12.9g) but the 100g of cricket also contains 5,1g of carbohydrates, 75,8 mg calcium, 185,3 mg phosphorous, 9,5 mg iron, thiamin, riboflavin, and niacin. *** Ok, I don't care how fat I get... I'm not eating bugs!!

The honeymoon period ended. The pain hit yesterday. Calli woke up at 4:30am in pain and with a fever. She spent the rest of the day zoned out. She basically laid on the couch all day. She doesn't like the tylenol with codeine because it tastes nasty, but she actually took it a couple times yesterday. Her fever was off and on all day. She livened up when Heather came over with the kids. Then it was hard to get her to lay still. Six of one, half a dozen of another I guess.

Nicky has his first baseball practice today as long as it doesn't rain. John's taking him and I'll stay home with Calli. We'll see which one gets kicked off the field first. John woke up in a nasty ass mood. Lovely.

I have come to hate Spongebob. I've decided to hate every minute of it. How is it that they can play the same 8 episodes over and over and no one complains. How do they pour drinks, how do they drive their boats around and land on a beach, lite fires, a squirrel living in a dome? ... under water? Kids don't find this odd? Don't get me wrong, it's a funny show, but after watching it for about 4 hours straight... you start loosing brain cells. I don't have that many to loose.

I know my blogging schedule has been all messed up, but I'll try to do it every night so that you all have it in the morning.

I need some topics. I'm sure you're all getting bored with reading about my life. If anyone has anything they'd like me to talk about, let me know.

Today's Did You Know: Although a cow has no upper front teeth, it grazes up to 8 hours a day, taking in about 45 kg (100 lb) of feed and the equivalent of a bath tub full of water. A healthy cow gives about 200,000 glasses of milk in her lifetime. ****Damn, I should have bought a cow. It would have saved us a lot of money with they way my kids drink milk!

God, where the hell is the remote! I gotta get this shit OFF!!

Calli got up this morning and feels like a million bucks. Or so she says. She's not complaining of any pain. She ate Mac and Cheese last night and oatmeal this morning (only a couple bites this morning). She got up about 6:30 and then passed out on the couch at about 8. She slept for about an hour and a half and got up fine. She's eating an ice pop now. She keeps saying her throat is fine.

The most bizarre thing... her voice has gone up about 2 octaves. It's really weird. Her voice is so much higher now.

So, I have told you about our bizarre fish?? I don't think so. We have a huge plate glass window that separates our living room and front room and the fish tank is up against the front room side. We keep getting water spots all over the window on that side. There isn't a top on the tank and we've caught the cats up there quite a few times. We figured the water marks were the cats sticking their paws in the water.

Turns out the insane shark Michelle gave us likes to do whale jumps out of the tank. It jumps up, does a flip and falls back in. Hence the water marks. We're gonna find that thing on the floor one of these days.

Why is it that they felt the need to make Nemo deformed? Why did he have to have a little fin? I don't think that was necessary. My favorite line... "You guys made me ink!" LOL HA

Surgery went really well. They gave her the goofy medicine and she thought it was pretty funny. She kept sitting up and saying, I'm dizzy and then falling back down. They put her in a modified crib with padded walls and she sat up and looked at the end of the bed and said, What's in there? I said nothing, it's just bars and padding. She leans really close to it and says, no, there's things in there... they're moving!! Look, you see them moving. HA, Sure sweety, we see it. Then we're walking down the hall and there's a statue of the virgin mary and she says, COOL, LOOK AT THAT MOM!! WOW!! I just laughed, yes, it's amazing dear. John and I were cracking up. She was all loopy.

She didn't come out of the anesthetic as well as she went in. She woke up screaming and coughing. Crying that her throat hurt and that she wanted a drink. They allowed her a tiny medicine cup full of water. It took us about 15 min to calm her down and she fell back to sleep. Once back in her room, she woke back up and was fine. She drank and had ice cream and talked for a while. She went back to sleep again and slept for a few hours. When she woke later the nurse asked if she wanted medicine and if her throat hurt. She said, no, it doesn't hurt. The nurse looked at me in a bit of awe. LOL Typical. I did have her give Calli some pain meds before we left just in case though.

We're home and watching Shrek now and she's resting. We'll see what tonight and tomorrow hold. Hopefully it'll be this easy. I'm assuming that she probably doesn't feel the pain because she's been in pain for so long that she's used to it. (kinda like my back) The struggle will be keeping her calm. They did give us tylenol with codine, so that should do it. LOL I've already had to yell at her to get her butt back on the couch 3 times. This isn't going to be easy.

Today's Did You Know: The can opener was invented 48 years after cans were introduced. *** Anyone thinking what I'm thinking? Obvious question of course.... hmm,

PS - Sorry Mark, I don't think we'll be able to attend the party this weekend. I don't think I'll be able to leave Calli with a sitter so soon. Sorry!!

Day One

Ahhh, Sunny Florida!! We got on the flight and a lovely young man from Sweden was seated next to me. He pulled out a paper and Donna and I proceeded to embarrass him as much as possible. He was a really good spot. He works for an airline company and was coming to FL to visit his parents. We had fun asking him all kinds of questions about the mile high club. Then he had fun trying to translate his paper for us. It was like a Swedish version of the National Enquirer. That was fun.

We had a really good flight. Just a little turbulence on the decent. I started saying WEEEEEEE! Donna grabbed my hand and said, NO, There will be NO WEEs, NO WEEING!! HA I thought it was fun! LOL

We land, walk outside and it’s 85 degrees. It’s freaking beautiful!! We got the rental car and we all rolled the windows down. Just lovely.

We pulled into the boss’ house… wait hold on, we pulled up to the gated community that he lives in, punched in the number to open the gate, and then drive through the estates to find his house. Then, we pulled into his house and it’s beautiful. HUGE. It’s only 2 years old and gorgeous. The outside has a huge screened in room the holds the pool (with hot tub attached). It’s a dream house.

We ate dinner, and I made the boss go out and start up the hot tub so I can jump in. It’s dark, so he turns on the lights in the pool, color changing of course. I can’t believe I’m here. It’s a bit of a downer that I’m here for work and not with my family. I’d love to be enjoying this with my family, but oh well.

I’m jumping in the pool tonight cause you never know what the training is going to be like and if we’ll have time later. I’m sure we will, but you never know.

I’ll update later on what else goes on. Unfortunately, I can’t connect to the internet so I’m going to write this in word and save it to put it on the blog later.

Day Two

The hot tub was chilly. He couldn’t get the hot water heater going. That’s ok. It started to rain so I didn’t stay in long. We went to bed about 11.

Got up Monday morning, showered, ate breakfast and they started the day. I was wiped out by the time we were done at 6:30. We had breaks in between, but I was still really tired. We went out to eat at a Mexican restaurant that was really nice. I sat across from the big boss and we had some really nice conversations. On the way back to the house we had him stop at a gas station to get ciggys. $26 A CARTON!! Jen and I bought 2 each. We walked out and she looked at the receipt and realized that they only charged us for 3 cartons. We thought it was really cool, unfortunately, we were stupid and told the boss. He pulled out to the end of the parking lot, turned and looked at me and said, you need to make a decision. Realize that he probably only makes about $5 an hour and he’ll have to make up that cost. I was just like… CRAP! YA KNOW, IF YOU WEREN’T MY BOSS…. ARG. Fine. Go back. So we go back in, I pay for it and leave. We pulled out of the parking lot and CRAP, we don’t have any more matches! Poor Bob, drives around again and Jen runs in. They tell her that it’s illegal for them to give them out now… Huh??? Whatever, she bought a lighter.

Came home and checked the pool, the heater has now kicked on. It’s 90 degrees so Donna and I jumped in for a while. It was like swimming in bathwater, just lovely. Got out and went to bed.

For all of you that are mad that I’m in sunny FL, you’ll be happy to know that I’ve slept horribly. Waking up half the night in pain. Took lots of Tylenol today.

Day Three

Got up, took a shower and started our meetings. I’m DONE!! I can barely concentrate anymore. Bob, the owner, went through his stuff licketly split. Everyone else is dragging on and on and I’m just not here anymore. I think it’s cause I know I’m in FL and a little sad that I really can’t enjoy it. I thought our flight was in the afternoon tomorrow so I could have time to chill in the sun… Nope, it’s at like noon, so we have to be out of here by 10. The house is 5 min from the Gulf of Mexico. I would have like to go see it, but I don’t think we’re going to get too. Total Bummer. Oh well. There’s nothing I can do about it. Maybe we’ll take a vacation down here.

I told John that we were moving to FL. I love it here. It’s so nice, sunny, warm, pretty, everything’s green! The palm trees swaying in the breeze. I think that when we move in a couple of years, we’re going to have to move somewhere warm. You don’t realize how much the cold weather sucks until you come to a place like this.

Half the group just had to go on a conference call and the rest of us got to go out and lay by the pool. Carla came out and said we’re gonna start again and she wants to hurry cause she wants us to go to the beach. YAYAY!!

Going Home

We never made it to the beach. The rest of the day ran late and then we went to dinner. I was exhausted by then and after we ate, they all sat there and talked for an hour. We didn’t leave until after 10. I was so done. We put on pj’s, said our goodbyes to those leaving early and went to bed.

We got up, packed and were out the door by 9am. We got to the airport, checked our bags and got on line for security… and stood there. There was an “old people leaving FL” convention. They were going so slow that we started to panic. Our flight was due to take off in 5 min and we were still way back in line. Some nice folks let us go ahead of them and we ran to the gate. We just made it.

I finally got to see the Gulf of Mexico… as we flew over it. I took some cool pics on my phone, but I really wanted to put feet in it. The water was so blue. Oh well, someday.

We got off the plane and the car service was nowhere in site. Donna called and they said, go outside, he’s out there somewhere. HUH??? The whole point of car service is they come in and get you and help you with your bags. Donna was seriously PO’d. I didn’t care, I just wanted to go home.

Home now. We stopped at the store and bought Calli a soft blanky, a mooshy doggie pillow and some fun games and coloring stuff. We’ll have to be up at 5:30 tomorrow and be at the hospital by 6:45.

Everyone cross your fingers that all goes well in the morning and she won’t be in too much pain.

I’ll update in the afternoon