At first I thought my gloom and doom feelings were to be paid attention too. Like something was going to happen. Then I thought, Oh you know what, I'm PMSing, which usually gives me that gloom and doom feeling. Then I find out from other family members that I'm not alone. My one cousin saw the spirit of one of our Great Aunt's (who has not passed yet, by the way), my sister has been having dreams of our old home town and a lot of fighting and general bad feelings, my other cousin in CA has even been feeling off and that something is about to happen. So far, my Godmother's long time boyfriend (loooonnnngggg time) passed away suddenly. That's one. It comes in threes around here. I hate the waiting. Although I don't want anything bad to happen, when I know it's going too, I just want to get it over with. Arg.

I haven't been getting a lot of sleep lately. I realized that even with all John's bitching about the lack of his sleep, he's still getting almost twice as much as I am. I'm always tired during the day and then at night, I'm wide awake. I can't seem to fall asleep. I'm usually up till around 1am and then I have to get up with Nick at 6:30. 5 1/2 hours sleep just doesn't do it for me. I've tried taking sleeping pills, but I'm so sensitive to medicine that, yes it knocks me out, but then I can't get up! Yesterday, I was just sooooo tired. After dinner, I took a nice, extremely hot bath. John was so sweet. He came in with candles and turned down all the lights for me. Awww. He even gave me a back rub. I don't know if it was the bath, the massage or the complete lack of sleep, but by 10 pm I was out! YAY me! And I got up this morning and didn't feel like I had to go back to sleep or fall over. Those extra few hours did me good. Now if only I could figure out how to do that every night without having to take baths and get massages (not that I minded!)

Oh, last night we had a super yummy dessert! I had run to the store for ketchup (meatloaf night) and I saw that they had strawberries on sale and they looked good. They also had those little sponge cake rounds things that they always have with berries to make like strawberry shortcake. I looked at the label and saw that there was a TON of sugar in those so was about to change my mind when I saw sugar free ones!! YAY I also found sugar free (calorie free, fat free, everything free) chocolate dipping sauce. I know that sounds like it would be gross, but it's made by the company that makes some of my favorite salad dressings which are also free of everything so I thought I would try it. And I grabbed some spray cool whip (which has less than 1 gram of sugar in it). So I sliced up the strawberries and sprinkled a little of a new sweetener I found (viu or something... just like splenda but doesn't have the funky after taste). After dinner I took my little cakes, scooped some chocolate sauce in the center, topped it with the berries and the whipped cream and VIOLA!! A completely yummy dessert with only about 5 grams of sugar (natural berry sugars). The kids skipped the berries. Calli likes strawberries, but didn't want to mix them with the other stuff and Nick doesn't like them at all. So they just had the cake, chocolate and cream. It was sooooo yummy I can't even tell you. Which only proves that I'm PMSing because all I can think about is eating! And that sucks cause I can hardly eat anything! WAH!

5 More pounds until I hit the 100 pound weight loss mark! Sooner or later. I need to start working out more. We had to take off most of last week because the kids were home sick and of course I can't seem to get my ass in gear to do it by myself. Damn elliptical broke! Anyway, I hope to find a cheap gym to join once we move.

Ok, off to dress my kid so we can go do the aforementioned work out. Tah.