I will never peal a potato again!! Check this out!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4W0qIPJmoo

At first I thought my gloom and doom feelings were to be paid attention too. Like something was going to happen. Then I thought, Oh you know what, I'm PMSing, which usually gives me that gloom and doom feeling. Then I find out from other family members that I'm not alone. My one cousin saw the spirit of one of our Great Aunt's (who has not passed yet, by the way), my sister has been having dreams of our old home town and a lot of fighting and general bad feelings, my other cousin in CA has even been feeling off and that something is about to happen. So far, my Godmother's long time boyfriend (loooonnnngggg time) passed away suddenly. That's one. It comes in threes around here. I hate the waiting. Although I don't want anything bad to happen, when I know it's going too, I just want to get it over with. Arg.

I haven't been getting a lot of sleep lately. I realized that even with all John's bitching about the lack of his sleep, he's still getting almost twice as much as I am. I'm always tired during the day and then at night, I'm wide awake. I can't seem to fall asleep. I'm usually up till around 1am and then I have to get up with Nick at 6:30. 5 1/2 hours sleep just doesn't do it for me. I've tried taking sleeping pills, but I'm so sensitive to medicine that, yes it knocks me out, but then I can't get up! Yesterday, I was just sooooo tired. After dinner, I took a nice, extremely hot bath. John was so sweet. He came in with candles and turned down all the lights for me. Awww. He even gave me a back rub. I don't know if it was the bath, the massage or the complete lack of sleep, but by 10 pm I was out! YAY me! And I got up this morning and didn't feel like I had to go back to sleep or fall over. Those extra few hours did me good. Now if only I could figure out how to do that every night without having to take baths and get massages (not that I minded!)

Oh, last night we had a super yummy dessert! I had run to the store for ketchup (meatloaf night) and I saw that they had strawberries on sale and they looked good. They also had those little sponge cake rounds things that they always have with berries to make like strawberry shortcake. I looked at the label and saw that there was a TON of sugar in those so was about to change my mind when I saw sugar free ones!! YAY I also found sugar free (calorie free, fat free, everything free) chocolate dipping sauce. I know that sounds like it would be gross, but it's made by the company that makes some of my favorite salad dressings which are also free of everything so I thought I would try it. And I grabbed some spray cool whip (which has less than 1 gram of sugar in it). So I sliced up the strawberries and sprinkled a little of a new sweetener I found (viu or something... just like splenda but doesn't have the funky after taste). After dinner I took my little cakes, scooped some chocolate sauce in the center, topped it with the berries and the whipped cream and VIOLA!! A completely yummy dessert with only about 5 grams of sugar (natural berry sugars). The kids skipped the berries. Calli likes strawberries, but didn't want to mix them with the other stuff and Nick doesn't like them at all. So they just had the cake, chocolate and cream. It was sooooo yummy I can't even tell you. Which only proves that I'm PMSing because all I can think about is eating! And that sucks cause I can hardly eat anything! WAH!

5 More pounds until I hit the 100 pound weight loss mark! Sooner or later. I need to start working out more. We had to take off most of last week because the kids were home sick and of course I can't seem to get my ass in gear to do it by myself. Damn elliptical broke! Anyway, I hope to find a cheap gym to join once we move.

Ok, off to dress my kid so we can go do the aforementioned work out. Tah.

Ok, totally crazy morning. I had a dream last night that I was hanging out with my old ex-friend (strange) that we were in Rockaway (my old home town) and watching some kind of dancing parade at my old school. Then we walked back to my old house and we were drinking beer (strange, I don't drink beer). When I woke up, my head was pounding like I had a hangover. WTF!

My head was pounding so bad I thought I would take a hot shower. As I was in the shower, I just had this feeling of impending doom. When I got out, I looked in the mirror and my face had exploded with my rosacea. That usually only happens when I'm severely stressed. I went out and smoked a ciggy and all these thoughts started racing through my head. Like, I had to call my sister to tell her that our Aunt died. Then it switched to my Mom died and I had to plan her funeral. That people were calling about the house and I was just telling them I couldn't deal with that right now because my mother had just passed away. I was thinking about how I was going to tell my sisters, how I was going to put it all together. I then started yelling at myself to stop thinking like that (I believe in that whole think about, bring about thing). But that sense of something horrible about to happen wont leave me. I just kept thinking, you need to call Mom right now.

I did call her and she's fine, but in my family, when people feel that something bad is going to happen, we go on red alert because we're usually right. I'm only about 50/50 on my feelings unless it's a cop up ahead on the road, then I'm always right, but the rest of the women in my family are usually dead on. So the word is being spread to see if anyone else is feeling it. My sister Joanne is usually the first one to feel it, but it's too early to call her right now. I'm hoping this is one of my off feelings cause this one is bad, very bad. I don't like it.

Ok, off that subject. On to my sick house. Nick was sick with fevers and a cough the beginning of the week. Then John got a cold. Mostly congestion, but of course he's dying! LOL MEN! Now Calli's got a cough and she said this morning that she has a tummy ache and a headache. Nick still has a nasty cough, but no more fevers. John's still dying. Oh lord. I pray I don't get it. My house would fall down if I was sick. God forbid MOM gets sick! Although, I have to say, I kinda like it when the kids are sick. They're so calm and snuggly. LOL I know. I'm a horrible mother, but all you mom's out there are thinking the same thing, don't deny it!

My house is cold this morning. We're almost out of wood. Probably only have a day or so left, but I really don't want to have to pay for another cord. I don't think we're going to need it and I don't want to waste the money. Of course, you know what's going to happen. We don't get anymore and then the temp drops to nothing for the next month and we freeze. Arg. At least we haven't run out this year. One of our neighbors has been getting it for us, and cheap to boot!

Ok, well, I guess I should go do something with my disaster of a house. My poor daughter hasn't had any jammas in a week or so cause she only has a couple that fit and they're all in the laundry that I've been desperately avoiding. Maybe if she didn't change pj's 15 times a day, she would have them to wear at night!

Casino Night was lots of fun as usual. They had a ton of great food and double the prizes as last year. But there was also double the people so I didn't really get a lot of play time in. It was nearly impossible to find an open seat! The rest of the gang played craps all night, but I'm not really good at that game. We did a little texas hold'um and black jack. Unfortunately, we didn't win anything. Shell and Tim and Allison cleaned up though!! Allison won a month of gymnastics at the place where Calli goes (the same prize I won last year) and she was sweet enough to give it to me! Very awesome! Shelly won a godiva basket, tickets to a kids play place, dinner at the Mohegan Sun and a casino night (TOTALLY COOL! - they bring in the tables and a croupier and everything for you). They last two were from the big ticket prizes. They were very lucky. Of course I would have liked to win some stuff, but that's ok. It was still a fun night.

We went to a birthday party for one of my mom's co-workers kids on Saturday night. It was a little weird. First, we didn't know anyone there. Then, they asked that all the kids get dressed up. Like formal dress. And the party didn't start until after 6pm, kinda late. They had a ton of food which was all good and some of it was really spicy. The father is Jamaican so there was a lot of that kind of food. They also had a live Jamaican band, who by the way, were outstanding. They sang everything, not just reggae and let me tell you, you would have thought they were playing cd's. Yeah, that good! By 10pm, we left. It was just getting too late and we were all tired.

Yesterday was an easier day. We cleaned for a showing that lasted all of 2 minutes. John fixed my car, brakes and something with the cat converter that was all busted up. I took the kids to go see the Oscar Mayer Wiener Mobile! The kids played outside for a little while until Nick came in saying he was tired. 20 min later I go upstairs to find him passed out in his bed. Wow, I thought, Mom must have really worn him out. When he woke up later, he was running a high fever and had a very painful cough. Oh boy, not worn out, sick. Great! This morning I got up and checked his temp again and it was back up, so I sent him back to bed and called him out of school. Right now he's just laying on the couch looking miserable. Poor kid. We'll see if I can get his fever down. I don't really want to take him to the dr. just so they can tell me he has a cold. That's so annoying.

Oh well, let's just cross our fingers that no one else gets it. Ta For Now

Need your help

My dearest friend Michelle makes these wonderful cakes (as you know!). She would love to start a business doing it but is having trouble with the pricing issue. Below is a link to her Facebook photo album with pictures of some of her cakes. If you could please go on there and set a price for each cake so we can kind of average out and get a better idea of what she should charge. Please BE HONEST! Don't worry about her feelings or any of that. She wants your honest opinion of how much you think a cake like that should cost. And don't let other people's prices bias you either. State you're own opinion. Don't worry about the first few cakes. Those are from when she was just learning hee hee hee, BOY has she improved! Pretty much just look at the ones I posted prices too. Happy pricing and thanks for your help!!

She said she opened this up to the public, so the link should work. Please let me know if it doesn't.

http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/album.php?aid=16152&id=1055700268

You know you're a paranoid mother when....

Last night, Calli, John and I were sitting on the couch. We were just playing and talking and I notice a very ugly looking mole on Calli's neck just below her jaw line. I touch it and feel that it's very raised and realize that it wasn't there a day or two ago. I immediately got very concerned and planned to call the dr. first thing in the morning. John looked at it and agreed that it was unusual. After a minute or two he called her over to look at it again. Then said to me, what did she have for lunch? I said, pb&j. He then proceeds to scrape off the "mole". Seems it was just a bit of jelly. hee hee, oops. I guess maybe it's better to jump to a conclusion concerning your kids health then to not notice at all.... right???

Speaking of Calli, the child NEVER STOPS TALKING! Mom said I was like that too and now I wonder how the hell that woman is sane at all. My God! It's just non-stop. She can talk about anything, and if she doesn't have a subject, she starts making up stories. It amazes me what she comes up with. Lately, I've just been sitting there watching her talk and watching the faces she makes (which are hysterical). She has such an imagination. I really have to try to get some of it on tape.

She's so unlike Nick. Nicky never really had an imagination. He never made up stories or played games like that. I'm sure it's an Aspie thing, but it could also be a boy thing. I feel like I've lost touch with him lately. He comes home from school and vanishes to his room. He doesn't really talk to me anymore. Even on the weekends, it's like he's lost in his own little world upstairs building legos, which he's amazing at. He comes down all proud of himself for what he's made. It's great, but I feel like I've lost him a little bit. I don't know how to interact with my kids. I don't know what to do with them "together" that would be fun for me too. I don't remember being one of those "imagination" kids like Calli. So when she wants to play like that, I actually don't know what to do. Weird.

So if anyone out there has activities that I can do with the kids that we can all enjoy and doesn't cost anything, fire away. I'm hoping that when we're in a warmer climate we can be outside playing sports and stuff. (HA!! Did you hear that? ME wanting to play sports!)

We went to the park on Sunday and that was fun. Nick brought his scooter and while John took Calli into the play area, Nick and I did a lap around the entire park. I had to run most of the way to keep up with him, and I didn't die. It was really nice. Before we left, we all went around again. John was so out of breath and I was fine. Hee hee, I told him, from now on whenever he wants a snack or to eat garbage, to remember that walk.

Weight update, I'm down to 167 - that's 90 pounds folks. My work out buddy injured her back so we haven't been able to work out (starting again today). And of course I can't seem to get myself to move without her. Although, I've been helping my friend Margaret clear up and organize her Mary Kay stock room and that was a little bit of a work out. Standing for hours and lots of bending. I felt muscles I didn't know I had! Hopefully I can get myself back on track now.

Ok, off to my workout. ttfn

Just incase you were wondering why I'm moving.... Here's an email my mom sent that's floating around about the joys of living in NJ.

Living in Northern New Jersey

Aug. 12 - Moved into our new home in Northern New Jersey . It is so beautiful here.. The hills and river valleys are so picturesque.. I have a beautiful old oak tree in my front yard. Can hardly wait to see the change in the seasons. This is truly God's Country.

Oct. 14 – New Jersey is such a gorgeous place to live, one of the real special places on Earth; I guess that’s why they call it the Ga rden State . The leaves are turning a multitude of different colors. I love all of the shades of reds, oranges and yellows, they are so bright... I want to walk through all of the beautiful hills and spot some white tail deer. They are so graceful; certainly they must be the most peaceful creatures on Earth. This must be paradise.

Nov. 11 - Deer season opens this week. I can't imagine why anyone would want to shoot these elegant animals. They are the very symbol of peace and tranquility here in New Jersey . I hope it snows soon. I love it here!

Dec. 2 - It snowed last night.. I woke to the usual wonderful sight: everything covered in a beautiful blanket of white. The oak tree is magnificent. It looks like a postcard. We went out and swept the snow from the steps and driveway..The air is so crisp, clean and refreshing. We had a snowball fight. I won, and the snowplow came down the street. He must have gotten too close to the driveway because we had to go out and shovel the end of the driveway again. What a beautiful place. Nature in harmony. I love it here!

Dec.. 12 - More snow last night. I love it! The plow did his cute little trick again. What a rascal. A winter wonderland. I love it here!

Dec. 19 - More snow - couldn't get out of the driveway to get to work in time. I'm exhausted from all of the shoveling. And that snowplow!

Dec. 21 - More of that white sh*t coming down. I've got blisters on my hands and a kink in my back. I think that the snowplow driver waits around the corner until I'm done shoveling the driveway. A$$hole.

Dec. 25 - White Christmas? More freakin' snow. If I ever get my hands on the sonofabitch who drives that snowplow, I swear I'll castrate him. And why don't they use more salt on these roads to melt this crap??

Dec. 28 - It hasn't stopped snowing since Christmas. I have been inside since then, except of course when that SOB "Snowplow Harry" comes by. Can't go anywhere, cars are buried up to the windows. Weather man says to expect another 10 inches. Do you have any idea how many shovelfuls 10 inches is ??

Jan. 1 - Happy New Year? The way it's coming down it won't melt until the 4th of July! The snowplow got stuck down the road and the sh*thead actually had the balls to come and ask to borrow a shovel! I told him I'd broken six already this season.

Jan. 4 - Finally got out of the house.. We went to the store to get some food and a goddamn deer ran out in front of my car and I hit the b*stard. It did $3,000 in damage to the car. Those beasts ought to be killed. The hunters should have a longer season if you ask me.

Jan. 27 - Warmed up a little and rained today. The rain turned the snow into ice and the weight of it broke the main limb of the oak tree in the front yard and it went through the roof. I should have cut that old piece of sh*t into fireplace wood when I had the chance.

May 10 - Took my car to the local garage. Would you believe the whole underside of the car is rusted away from all of that damn salt they dump on the road? Car looks like a bashed up, heap of rusted cow sh*t.

May 23 - Sold the car, the house, and moved to Florida . I can't imagine why anyone in their freakin' mind would ever want to live in the God forsaken State of New Jersey .

Ya know, I have my moments when this move seems like a really bad idea. Where the thought of leaving family and friends and my house is heatbreaking. I had that moment 2 nights ago. Lying in bed, crying. And then.... something happens to remind me why we're leaving. The next morning I woke up, got in the shower, washed my hair, put in conditioner and POOF, no more water. That's right folks, the pipes froze AGAIN!! 2 days without water this time. It finally came back yesterday afternoon. Although I still have my doubts, things like this dull them quite a bit.

It's Friday! If you haven't signed up for Casino Night, today is the LAST DAY to do it. Please come, it'll be loads of fun, I promise!!

I have a lot of catch up to do. Since we didn't have water, I have a ton of dishes and laundry that need to be done. Yippeee!

So after all that snow last weekend... this weekend it's supposed to be in the 60's! WTF? I don't get it.

What else??? I don't know. I can't think straight today, I'm so tired! Off to run some errands.

The speech was no big deal people. It's just kind of a visual for the people attending. When you're really fat, it's hard to picture yourself as thin. So seeing people come in who have had the surgery and seeing their before pictures, really helps them decide. It was really like a 15 min thing with a couple other post op people. You didn't miss anything, I promise. LOL Well, you missed me showing off my ass.

I booked my flight this morning. YAYAY!! I feel better knowing that's done.

Below are some pics from today. Damn winter.

And you wonder why we're moving south???

9 inches and counting (notice me with the ruler)

Feeling yucky today. I was feeling kinda off yesterday, but put it down to PMS. Today I woke up with a headache (never a good start) and then everything I ate made me pukey. I'm sure it's PMS plus lack of following the rules. Not enough protein, not enough vitamins, not enough fluids, all that jazz. I took my vitamins and drank a shake today, plus I drank a bunch of water and arizona tea (diet of course). Now I just have to make sure I do it every day. I really need to get my ass in gear.

I went for my check up with the surgeon on Monday and he was pretty pleased with me (except for the vitamins and protein). He invited me to speak at their seminar. So Wednesday I did just that. I went to the seminar that I went to before my surgery where they tell you everything about it. I stood up there and told them what I'd done in the last 6 months. (the good and the bad) I brought my before pictures too. I even showed off my ass!! LOL, hell, it's a lot smaller than it was. Afterwards, people came up to me and thanked me and asked some questions. It was nice. Kind of an ego booster but also helps them too.

I'm booking my flight from FL for the end of April. Of course when I wanted to go is the weekend after Easter and the prices were doubled!! Damn Thieves! Then I was thinking the weekend before Easter, but since I'm driving John's car down, leaving it there and flying back, that would leave me without a car for over a month.... I don't think so! So, it'll be the weekend of the 26th. I'll leave here Wednesday afternoon, get there Thursday some time and leave probably Monday (cheaper to fly than Sunday). That will give me plenty of time to get the lay of the land, see a ton of houses and hopefully secure one.

As for our house. We've dropped the price to $250,000 in hopes of a nibble. We've figured out that we're not going to make anything at this point, so we're going to submit any offer we get. Which we haven't as of yet. Either way, we're leaving in early May. I spoke to both mortgage companies and they are both on board for a short sale. Doing the "deed in lieu" where you just sign over the house, we found out, is actually considered a foreclosure. It just skips all the legal crap. So we'll stick with the short sale and just let everyone that's looking know that it's basically "no offer to low". At this point it's not up to us. It will be submitted to the bank and they will make the decision. We owe 230,000 I'm assuming they'll take 200 or possibly even lower. We owe 160 on the first and 70 on the second. So you do the math. Doesn't matter to us anymore. We were hoping to get like 245-250 so we could walk away with a couple thousand, but I don't think it's gonna happen. Oh well.

For those of you who want to go to Casino Night, it's LAST CALL. This is a charity event for the Children's Tumor Foundation. It's on March 13th. Friday, March 6th (THIS FRIDAY) is the last day to register. It's so much fun. The price includes dinner, gambling, a chinese auction and open bar. They are also having some vendors this year and the "Gold Guy". So if you have old gold or jewelry that you don't want anymore, he's paying cash on the spot for it. Pretty cool. It's definitely a fun night. I'm hoping my luck holds out from last year!! If you'd like to go, post a comment with your email, or send me an email and I'll forward you all the info. Again, FRIDAY is your last day to register.

The snow is coming.... again. Bah Humbug. They're calling for 6-12 inches tonight. Oh Joy.

What else.... hmmm... yeah, I got nuthin!