When it rains... if FUCKING POURS!!!

The cars are both in need of repair.. The freaking van driver's side door hasn't opened since Memorial day so I've been climbing over the passenger side for months.

We're a month behind on both mortgages, plus all the other freaking bills. They're gonna shut everything off soon. Which wouldn't be a big deal except for the fact that I work from home and need electric and internet.

The fridge died yesterday. We got someone out to look at it today and he said that we're basically screwed. The part we need is really hard to find and would cost a minimum of $300. He said might as well by a new one.

And the electric company showed up today and said $1,700 or they shut us off. Like I had that money. I wrote them a check anyway in hopes of figuring something out before they cash it.

I hate my life right now. Why do we have to use money? I don't get it. Why can't we go back to bardering???

I took all my jewelry down to the "we buy gold" place and the guy only offered me $98 for my wedding rings. I told him hell no. And the price for the other stuff was equally as bad.

Ok, so, basically, if anyone has a fridge they're not using... I NEED IT BADLY!!!!

Just shoot me now.

I forgot to tell my story from the weekend. On Saturday I drove down the shore to my Aunt's house for my little cousin's 3rd birthday. He's the cutest little thing you've ever seen. We had a really fun day. The kids played football in the yard. The funniest thing was that Calli wiped the floor with the boys and made 2 touchdowns! HA LOL

So we pack it up to drive home. John calls (he had to go to some safety training thing for work) and said he had the guy he car pooled with drop him off about 7 - 8 miles away from our house and that he was walking home. (the guy was annoying and John didn't want to sit in the car with him anymore. lol Cause we all know how patient John is!) So I was like, well we've left already, so I'll pick you up about 1/2 way home.

Did you know that sun glare can make it so that you can't see any signs on the highway? I ended up on the wrong highway. Lordy. But, it was 1 & 9. I said, no big deal, I can take that up. Forgetting of course that I had to get on 78. So, me and the kids took a lovely trip through Newark, Jersey City and Hoboken (for those of you that don't live around here... not the BEST areas of Jersey). We went over the lovely Polaski Skyway (that's scary). So, as we're driving dangerously close to the Holland Tunnel, Nick's in the back seat yelling, "CALLI, Look, the Empire State Building!! We're going to New York!!" Considering I had all of $10 on me and the tunnel costs like $8 or something, I said, Not if I can help it!! John called and said, How's it going.... Not so good honey. LOL

After driving around Hoboken for about 20 minutes, I finally found signs to get me back where I was going. Needless to say, a drive that should have taken about an hour, hour and a half took me 2 1/2 hours. The funniest thing... I picked up John about 1/4 mile from our house! LOL Poor guy.

Well, at least it showed how much the kids really want to go into the city. HA Maybe when we have some money we'll take a trip in. Go to the top of the Empire State Building. That'll be fun. I've been wanting to take them to the Central Park Zoo anyway. We're booked up for quite a while. FOOTBALL!!

OH, Nick got weighed in last night and he ... MADE WEIGHT!! YAYAYAYAYAY We're very happy. This week is all football. Practice Monday - Thursday, a pep rally on Friday and a scrimmage on Saturday. At least he's enjoying it.

Our roomates are moving out Sunday/Monday. She's getting the truck Sunday but can't move into the house until Monday. We're going to help her pack up on Sunday, but we have plans with Shelly for Monday. So my house will finally be stinky dog free next week!! YAYAY

Here's a good story for you. Last night Heather and I are sitting here watching one of those documentaries on the Duggers (the family with 17 kids) and I hear Maggie outside barking like crazy. Then I hear what sounded like garbage cans outside. THEN, I put 2 and 2 together and said, Oh shit, BEAR. So we run out to the deck and peak around to see if we can see it. Then realize it wasn't the garbage cans, it was Heather's cooler. That's the second time they got the cooler. LOL She like, damnit, get me a flashlight. I said, what are you gonna do when a 500 pound black bear decides not to give you back your cooler???? Dumb Ass. We went up to my room and went out the back deck to look. He had the cooler dragged up into the back yard and we heard him back in the woods. He didn't come back out.

UNTIL... lol. I went out this morning to take Calli to school and saw that he decided the cooler didn't have enough in it (juice boxes and snack stuff for Heather's kids) cause one of the garbage cans was pulled back there too and opened all over. Damn Bears!! At least be out there when we're looking for you so we can take your picture!! hee hee hee

Ok, now that I talked long enough to avoid work.... gotta go do some.

Sorry I haven't written in a while.
Update.... I'm still at 230. I didn't drop any weight this week and I'm not really happy about that. I don't know if it's cause I was kinda constipated for quite a while, or cause I haven't been drinking enough, or maybe not getting in enough protein. I don't know. But at this point.... I start freaking out wondering if I went through all this for just a 30 pound loss. I'm not happy with that. I can eat food and I don't think I should be able too. Like, I think I should be throwing it up or something. LOL I can almost finish one egg with a slice of cheese and a couple slices of turkey bacon. I think that's too much. Although, that one meal can last me all day. hee hee. I think that's part of the problem... I'm not eating enough meals. Oh I don't know. I don't know how to work this stupid thing.

I did get some Arizona Diet Iced tea. It's something I can drink and get it down. Hopefully I'll be able to get in all my liquids between this, the protein shake and some water. Protein and liquids... that's the main thing.

Nick's really starting to like football. I'm glad. His first game is next saturday. Hopefully he makes weight. I'm trying to get him to drink more fluids too. And cutting out his snacks has been are real pain. He's really doing well. He LOVES to tackle!! lol Surprise, Surprise, Surprise!

Ellen and Portia got married. The pics in the new People were great. I love Ellen. I think she's great and really funny. I'm glad she's happy. They really look happy together and so in love. Congrats Ellen and Portia.

Work is busy. I need to clear the voicemail every week and call them all back. I called in today and there were 78 messages!! Oh lord. I charged my phone last night and I used the entire battery today. It died, so I finally stopped making calls at around 3. Ug.

Ok, going to put dinner in the oven. Have a great day folks!

Hurricane has hit Florida. No word from my sisters. I talked to my niece today who said everything was cancelled/closed. Can't get a hold of my sister though. I told Cassy to tell Joanne to "phone home". They already got hit with it and now it's turning around and going over them again. Lovely. Cross your fingers that all is ok down there.

It's cold here today. It's beautiful outside, but it's really chilly. My house stays really cool as it is, so when it's chilly out, it's freezing in here. I'm about ready to start a fire! The kids want to go swimming!!! Nut jobs. The pool is only 70. HELL NO!

Still kinda hurting. I just could not get comfortable last night in bed. I ended up taking a pain pill. Once I finally got to sleep I was ok. Today's a little better. I'm just afraid to move around too much.

I also have a fear of eating. HA, funny isn't it. Now that I can eat a little more, I'm afraid to eat anything. Not because it might make me sick, but because it will slow down my weight loss. How sick is that?!?! I know I need to eat, but 1/2 the time I'm not hungry and the other 1/2... I think about the scale. This is very bad. I need to stop that. It's 12:30 and all I've had today is a polly-o string cheese. I need to try something else.

My cat is sick. All the animals in the house got fleas, so John bought flea collars for them. Mom had said, be careful cause cats can have a reaction to them. Well, guess what.... Mocha is wheezing, coughing, sneezing, her eyes and nose are running. I called mom today and she said that's really really bad. Mom bred cats so she knows what she's talking about. She said the vet can't really do anything about it except for to give them fluids. It's a waiting game to see if she'll make it through or not. Cross your fingers for that one too folks. The kids will be heartbroken if the cat dies. DAMN FLEAS!!

I need my hair dyed. The grays are making quite an appearance. I just haven't had the time to do it. I really need to get around to that. Maybe I'll go red again. We'll see.

I need an ice cream maker. Does anyone have one they don't use?? I found this blog of a woman who had the same surgery and she has awesome recipes. She also has a TON of protein ice creams on there!! YUM. Hence, my need for the ice cream maker. If anyone has one shoved in the back of their closet that they never use, HAND IT OVER!!

Off to get Nick ready for football.

The pain and burning has continued. I think I might have done way too much walking the other day. Turning over in bed is a nightmare and don't even ask about sneezing. OH LORD. It's a little better today though. So that's good. I plan to walk again tonight, but not as far or as fast. Aunt Irene says... A "Stroll".

I'm supposed to drink this Skim Plus milk. I don't like it. I'd rather just have skim milk. This is thick and has a odd flavor. Blaaa (Ha, I always thought it was SKIN milk. I mean, that's how I always said it anyhow)

I was hoping it would be warmer today so the kids could go in the pool, but ... nope. I think it's barely gonna hit 80. I'm finally home during the summer and it's a spring!! Arg.

Ok, today's a short one. I need to go call Shell. Haven't talked to her in a while.

Friday night we see a commercial for a car dealership that's having some big Dukes of Hazzard day. John Schneider was going to be there. (He played Bo for those of you who don't know) Since the kids love Dukes of Hazzard (and so do we) we figured we'd go.

Ok, should have left WAY earlier. We waited in line for 2 hours!! Thank god it was under a tent. I had to sit a couple times cause my tummy wasn't liking standing there. They had free burgers, dogs, snacks and drinks so the kids didn't complain too much. When we finally got up there at about 2pm... Can I tell you... that man had been STANDING there greeting people since 10 am and he was the sweetest thing! We had read that his son also has A.S. and we asked. He said oh yes, and actually took a couple minutes to talk to us about it. I was so impressed by him. We have a picture and I'll post it as soon as I can. 25 years later and he's still gorgeous!

Yesterday was a really nice day. John blew up the jumpoleen which is too small for Nick really, but since it was so cheap, we didn't care and let them jump in it. Later, we put it in the pool and the kids had a blast. The water was wayyyy toooooo cooolllldddd, but they were in it anyway.

Then at like 7 I said, how about we go for a walk? We walked around the lake. A real nice walk. We decided to do that every night. And on nights that Nick has football, we'll walk around the field. I can't quite work out yet but I thought walking would be ok. Although... my left side is hurting a lot. I left a message for the nurse to ask her if it's normal.

Ok, update...

As of today (2 weeks post surgery)... I am down 27 pounds. John and Mom say they can see it... I still can't really. Oh well, I'm sure I will soon. I was 257 at the start of surgery and I'm at 230 now. That is 2 pounds less then my high school weight. My lowest weight was 205 after I had Nick. So I still have 26 pounds till I beat that. I just can't wait to get under 200. Too see 199 ... I think I'll cry.

I had to keep telling myself last night that we love our son and that we signed him up for football so he could get some much needed exercise and socialization. All that being said didn't help much as I sat there in the POURING rain watching him play. Did I think to bring an umbrella? NOOOooooo. Calli has a couple little girls (other players sisters) who she plays with and the ones mom had a huge umbrella that all the girls sat under and played. John had his rain gear and Mom was smart enough to bring an umbrella. I just got soaked. LOL Loverly. But Nick had fun, so that's all that matters.

My house still freaking smells. 2 more weeks until the dog is gone. And I think the cats have finally decided to protest and are peeing all over. ARG. When these guys leave I'm gonna have the carpet and furniture cleaned. Anyone know of a cheap place that will get the smell out??

My tummy hurts today. More like a tummy ache then any surgery issues. I had some cottage cheese this morning. Some people say dairy doesn't work well. We'll see. BUT, I got up this morning, before 8 am, took a shower, did a load of laundry, sorted out all the other laundry upstairs, did a load of dishes and got Calli off to school. All before 9:30am. YAY, here comes the energy I guess.

Off to clean more.

PS - I forgot to thank Lisa and Jessie for coming to see me in the hospital. That was very sweet of you guys. Can't wait to see you again! The November Toy Party is right around the corner!!

Last night I experienced my first "dumping syndrome". Let me tell you... I will NEVER drink orange juice again!

I was told I could have watered down fruit juice. So I grabbed some OJ last night and drank almost a whole glass. Probably way to fast. By the time I was almost done I started to feel weird. Like all the juice was just sitting above my ribs. Lots of pressure and then pain started. Went potty and started throwing up. Do you know how much it hurts to throw up when your stomach is barely back together? A LOT.

I ended up tossing my cookies (which was actually all dry heaving and phlem) from about 10:30 - sometime around 2am. Combined with lots of pain. It was horrendous. So yeah, no more OJ for me. I plan to call the dietician today to find out what I can and can't actually have.

I didn't get to see the end of the women's gymnastics last night. Arg. I was so sick that them swinging around on the bars was just making it worse. So, I turned it off. Now I have to go look to see who won. Hopefully there will be a site I can watch it on.

Ok, off to try to put something in this stomach... .ug, I don't wanna.

Doctor's appointment went well. I got all my staples removed (24) and I've lost 10 pounds! Yay Me! Cellulitus is mostly cleared up now. Feeling crappy and down today though. I'm really tired.

Things I learned yesterday....

Nick realized that his penis "looks HUGE" when he's wearing a cup. He said, Hey, it looks like an elephants nose. - I swear, I thought John and I were both gonna pee our pants last night listening to him.

Calli has come into her 6th sense. She's said a couple things in the past that made me think it was there. Like she's seen people's eyes in the living room if she wakes up at night and comes down stairs. Just kinda weird stuff. Last night we were at Nick's football practice (hence the cup) and she was sitting on my lap. All of a sudden she said, Mommy, who's that man?

What man?

That man over there. (Pointing to the bleachers across the field).

I kept saying Where?

She said, MOM, Don't you see him? He's got on funny make up and he's wearing a costume. Let's go over there and see him.

Hmm.. WHERE??? (This went back and forth for quite a while with her trying to describe where he was and what he looked like)

Right.... Hey, where did he go?

10 minutes later she said MOM MOM, There he is again, do you see him?

I said the bleachers over there or over there? (There were two sets)

Over there.

Ok. See the man sitting there with the black baseball hat on?

Yeah.

Is he by him?

Yeah! He's right there! Aaaand Now he's gone again.

There was no one sitting by the man with the hat the entire time we were there. Now, Calli has an active imagination and talks silly all the time, but she was ADAMANT that there was a weird guy over there. And, Calli can't lie to save her life. If you look at her and say, Are you fibbing? Her hand immediately goes to her mouth to cover her grin as she says No.

John just said... Ok, is it time to go now. LOL Chicken.

Welcome to our world Calli! Hold tight to it.

This is going to be a VERY long blog, so hang in there folks!

Tuesday morning I had to get up early. I am NOT a morning person. I was brought into the back room pretty quickly and they started hooking me up to everything. The had me all ready and the doc comes in and says, "Ok, just so you know, I just left the party 20 minutes ago, so I should be good." HA LOL Then... uhm... crap, I don't remember. I don't remember leaving the prep room or getting into the O R. Weird.

I then remember hearing aliens talking, feeling an amazing amount of pain, AMAZING AMOUNT OF PAIN, saying OMG, I can't handle this. The aliens saying something about, ok, we're going to change your pain medicine. I then remember being wheeled out and hearing John say "It's about time!". Supposedly the dr. had come out after about an hour and told him everything went ok, but they left me in recovery for hours and hours. Don't know what was up with that.

In my room... Don't know how I got there. Just know I was there. They set me all up and I don't remember much else. I had one of these sponge on a stick things that I could clean my mouth with.. nasty. I ended up just swishing water in my mouth and then spitting it out. Mom came after John left and hung for a while.

Day Two - I had a couple bought of vomiting, well dry heaving really since there was nothing in there, which was horrid. they had me on Delauded, a very strong pain medicine. They wanted me to get up and pee. I had some real problems getting the pee out. It didn't wanna come out! I also kept falling asleep on the potty. So I didn't push my pain button for hours so that I could do a little bit of walking. Well, it still felt like I was hitting the button. I was in a constant haze, in and out of sleep and not able to stay coherent for very long. Well, since I always like to be in control... as most of you know... I started to freak out. The nurses came in and I just started bawling!! Totally freaking out. I do remember hugging the nurse at some point. I don't know. Like I said, totally out of it. Well, they immediately removed the pain meds. Seems this is not a very good reaction. HA I went to shots of morphine and percocet. Right after that, Shelly showed up (I think it was after that) She got her hair cut and looks really pretty. I don't remember what we talked about or how long she was there. But I remember her hair cut.

Mom, John and the kids came later. Don't remember much of that. Then sleep again. Wake up to try to pee, sleep, walk a little, sleep, pee, throw up a little. It was a very hazy 3 days.

Thursday, The dr. came in around 10. Said everything looked good. He said "You ready to go home?" I said .. uhm NO. He said "Great, let's get the tube out and call your ride." Uhm... k. The tube... yeah, so they have this drainage tube coming out of your tummy going to a bulb thing that they drain. I said, is this gonna hurt, he says.. "Noooooo , ok, on four. 1, 2" PULL. OMG. That was the most awful, bizarre feeling. He pulled out like 3 feet of tubing that was all wrapped up inside me. Just sooo weird. Hurt a little, but just mostly really weird.

I called John and said, k, come get me. He's like, huh? So I went home. My friend Margaret came to pick up Calli and took her for a play date. They went swimming in the lake and late lunch at Mcy D's so the girls could play in the play room. That day wasn't too bad. Kept on my pain meds.

Friday I realized that all that pushing to try to pee gave me a roid... oh joy. Never had one of those and it wasn't too bad. Mom went home... booo hooo hooo. I told her that when she retires, she needs to move in here and be our housekeeper. She kept up with everything. It was so great to have her.

Saturday I got up and did something stupid. I had John drive me down the shore to a baby shower. It was for my friend from high school that I hadn't seen in years and I really didn't want to miss it. We left pretty late unfortunately. We ended up hitting a lot of traffic and it took us 2 1/2 hour to get down there. The kids were on the brink of death. They couldn't stop the entire way, touching, hitting, fighting, screaming... omg... it was horrible. When we got there, she was sooo surprised to see me. I'm glad. Made the trip worth it. She opened her presents and then people started to leave. John came back with the kids and we ate lunch there. (They had pizza, I had really way to salty onion soup - just the broth) Then we headed back. Only took about an hour and a half to get back.

Well, 4 hours in the car with a small roid makes a very big painful roid. I was up most of the night. At 3 am I was only looking for a cure. I got up in the morning just crying in pain. John ran to the store to buy me stuff. Then I went to take a warm bath since that's supposed to help. As I go in to take my clothes off, I realize that my leg hurt. Look down and the entire top half of my thigh is bright red. Looked like a had a really bad sunburn. Felt that way too. John said it looked funny. So after my bath I called Mom, who said call the Dr. Dr. said, sounds like cellulitus. Get to the ER and spend 4 hours there which was not fun. Cellulitus was the correct diagnosis. Turns out it was something that I had to have gotten in the hospital. They made me do a round of antibiotics through IV before I left and sent me home with a script. I also got stuff for my roid! YAYAY. The stuff the ER gave me for the roid works SOOOO much better then the shit we bought at the store.

Got home and was running a pretty good fever. I was freezing! Felt pretty crappy. But I slept well last night.

I got up this morning feeling pretty good. I go to the Dr. today to get all my staples out and to get weighed in. I'll let you know what happens,... I have a pretty good idea though. :o)

Ok, before I boar you all to death....

Signing off!

This is it folks. My last day in the eating world. Well, actually, yesterday was my last day since I'm not allowed to have anything but clear liquids today.

So, my bathroom is really nice... I've been spending a lot of time in there. Noticing all the little things that need to be done. Ceilings washed, floor redone, repaint... it's still nice though. All the pretty blue flowers. I think I'll be able to count all the flowers by the end of the day. The shit I had to drink wasn't too bad. It was actually sickeningly sweet. And it works... FAST. I was on my first run to the potty within 10 min. Ug. It's funny, I wasn't really scared of the surgery, I was scared of that drink!!!

My surgery is scheduled for 7:45 tomorrow morning. I have to be there at 6:15. So by the time most of you wake up tomorrow, I'll be out of surgery. I will be at St. Clair's Hospital in Dover. Feel free to come visit. Bring flowers and balloons and shit... NO FOOD!! I will be there till Thursday some time. So this will be my last post till probably the weekend depending on how I feel. I plan to be completely drugged. Say YAY to Drugs!!

Saturday I have plans to go to a baby shower. HA. LOL I got an email from the sister of my best friend from high school. She's having a little girl and the shower is on Saturday. Her sister and Mom are so excited I said I would come. They said I would be the only thing they could surprise her with. LOL I already bought all the presents, so I"M GOING!!! John's gonna drive me down and I'll be drugged. I'll bring my little shakes and drinks. No baby cake for me... waahhhh. :o(

Ok folks... that's it for me. Think about me tomorrow morning. Cross your fingers!!

Love ya all.

Sorry, I haven't written in a while. Not much was going on.

Thursday was the football meet and greet. They had a little bbq for everyone to meet their coaches. It was fun. I talked to the head coach to find out where Nick was supposed to go. After looking at him, he said, ok, go over there to that group. They had told me at sign ups that Nick would be on the flag football teams this year. He really wasn't happy about that. He didn't like the idea of not being able to actually tackle. lol Well, turns out that the group they put him in is pre-clinic, which is full contact tackle. OH LORD SAVE ME. He is THRILLED. He was so happy even when they had them run sprints. Monday is his first practice and he's bouncing off the walls in anticipation. Now, I know... I was the one who said from birth that my son will NEVER play football. It was too dangerous a sport. And now... well, I still believe it's totally deadly, but it'll be good for him to get some exercise and burn off some aggression. Again, Lord Save Me.

Yesterday we went to the NJ State Fair (better known as the Sussex County Farm and Horse Show). For those of you that don't know, this fair is massive! We were there for 7 hours. That's right, I said SEVEN HOURS. By 9pm, the kids wanted to do more rides, but we were exhausted and broke. We said no and then of course 5 minutes later, they realized they could barely walk anymore. They won stuffed animals, ate their hearts out, did rides, watched shows, did the pig races, rode the elephants and ponies. They had a very full day.

Oh, they have a huge green house there and the "Master Gardner's of NJ" were there. It's a group of ladies that offer advice on gardening. I asked them for something that I could plant and not kill. They thought I was kidding... I wasn't. I kill everything. I have black thumbs. They gave me something called Wegilia. It's a SHRUBBERY!! (From the Knights who say NIH!) It's got dark purpley leaves and she said they get little pink flowers on them. Cross your fingers folks. I'm gonna try to plant it tomorrow. Ug.

Today, we woke up with plans to go to Wild West City. We live right down the street from this place. Literally 1/2 a mile down the road and Nick hasn't been there since he was two and Calli has never been there (except for the easter egg hunts). So, we get ready, head out the door towards some breakfast, get 2 min down the road and what happens... DOWN POUR! So as we are eating our breakfast and watching the cats and dogs hit the pavement, we realized that going to Wild West City where it is walking along dirt roads that would now be mushy mud, was NOT the best idea. It started to let up a little so we thought maybe Space Farms. We asked the kids which they wanted to do and Space Farms won.

It turned out to be a very fun day. We walked around Space Farms, saw and fed all the animals (I'll post the pictures of the kids bottle feeding a baby calf. So cute) and looked at all the antique toys, cars, and farm equipment. Lions and Tigers and Bears.. OH MY.

2 more days folks....